The truth at last???

[snakehips 0]

Discussed this with my colleagues.

 

This lad Jesus. He knaas he's gonna come back to life, right? So what does he do beforehand? He does what every self-respecting bloke who knows he's gonna get killed then come back to life would do - he insures himself up to the fucking hilt, man!!! Probably in the region of a couple of million Roman sistursees (sp).

 

So he's on the cross thinking ' Aye, it's a bit sore, but I fucking knaa (who can honestly say he didn't talk like that?) I'm not gonna die. Shit' So he has to insult the Roman guard to kill him with his spear. Something like ' hey ya ginga hermer, you're just a Roman Mackem' or some such like. The Roman takes great umbrage and spears Jesus - dead.

 

Now Jesus is pronounced dead and taken to the cave. Meanwhile, Mrs Jesus, Mary Magdelaine (sp) goes and collects the dosh.

 

She then goes round to the Garden of Getseminal and gets him out the cave, they sail off up the Med, buy France and live there happily ever after...........Sorted!

 

Dan Brown, it's over to you.

[ewerk 31770]

[Jimbo 175]

Discussed this with my colleagues.

 

This lad Jesus. He knaas he's gonna come back to life, right? So what does he do beforehand? He does what every self-respecting bloke who knows he's gonna get killed then come back to life would do - he insures himself up to the fucking hilt, man!!! Probably in the region of a couple of million Roman sistursees (sp).

 

So he's on the cross thinking ' Aye, it's a bit sore, but I fucking knaa (who can honestly say he didn't talk like that?) I'm not gonna die. Shit' So he has to insult the Roman guard to kill him with his spear. Something like ' hey ya ginga hermer, you're just a Roman Mackem' or some such like. The Roman takes great umbrage and spears Jesus - dead.

 

Now Jesus is pronounced dead and taken to the cave. Meanwhile, Mrs Jesus, Mary Magdelaine (sp) goes and collects the dosh.

 

She then goes round to the Garden of Getseminal and gets him out the cave, they sail off up the Med, buy France and live there happily ever after...........Sorted!

 

Dan Brown, it's over to you.

 

Too far fetched, no fucker would ever buy that story !

[snakehips 0]

Ah, but!

 

What are two of the most famous words in French??

 

JE SUIS !!!!!! It's a corruption of JESUS, JE-SUS !!

 

Jesus is in France and after a while he decides to introduce himself to a few of the natives.

 

'hiya' he says, and points to himself 'Jesus' again 'Jesus'.

Now the locals at that time don't have any language of course so they haven't got a scooby what he's on about. So they just try and mimic what he is saying. 'Jey zzuz' they say (caus they're not used to talking) 'Jay sux' then all of a sudden 'Je suis'. At this they just go mental jumping around shouting their new words to each other and completely ignoring Jesus.

 

The beginning of modern French. See, he was in France after all !!!!

[Radgina 1]

Ah, but!

 

What are two of the most famous words in French??

 

JE SUIS !!!!!! It's a corruption of JESUS, JE-SUS !!

 

Jesus is in France and after a while he decides to introduce himself to a few of the natives.

 

'hiya' he says, and points to himself 'Jesus' again 'Jesus'.

Now the locals at that time don't have any language of course so they haven't got a scooby what he's on about. So they just try and mimic what he is saying. 'Jey zzuz' they say (caus they're not used to talking) 'Jay sux' then all of a sudden 'Je suis'. At this they just go mental jumping around shouting their new words to each other and completely ignoring Jesus.

 

The beginning of modern French. See, he was in France after all !!!!

 

[Rob W 0]

he never read the small print

 

 

"Insurance is only valid if not convicted by the High Court of Jeruslaem of owt including reckless chariot driving"