Guest Toplass-101 Posted July 23, 2006 Share Posted July 23, 2006 Geez you went though a hard time having your son, think ill stick to being a Mam to cats only, after reading about the birth of your lad. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jimbo 172 Posted July 23, 2006 Share Posted July 23, 2006 I know what you mean, Toonraider, I'm a very selfish person by nature, and I remember seeing my daughter for the first time and thinking that for the first time in my life there was someone in this world that meant more to myself than me. Sounds like a horrible thing to say, I love my parents and my partner dearly but when I first saw my first born, it felt like there was another me in this world, and I think thats the best way i can describe it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Toonraider 0 Posted July 23, 2006 Share Posted July 23, 2006 Geez you went though a hard time having your son, think ill stick to being a Mam to cats only, after reading about the birth of your lad. 163537[/snapback] Nooo TL, dont let anybody's experience put you off, yes i had a very long and difficult time, but all was well in the end, plus that was over 20 years ago, things have changed now. It was typical me, im bloody awkward anyway!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Toonraider 0 Posted July 23, 2006 Share Posted July 23, 2006 I know what you mean, Toonraider, I'm a very selfish person by nature, and I remember seeing my daughter for the first time and thinking that for the first time in my life there was someone in this world that meant more to me than myself. Sounds like a horrible thing to say, I love my parents and my partner dearly but when I first saw my first born, it felt like there was another me in this world, and I think thats the best way i can describe it. 163540[/snapback] yep, thats pretty much spot on jimbo! I was young myself, still a kid in a lot of ways really, i had to grow up pretty damn quickly, for I had someone else to put before myself. And so it remains i think. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jusoda Kid 1 Posted July 23, 2006 Share Posted July 23, 2006 I know what you mean, Toonraider, I'm a very selfish person by nature, and I remember seeing my daughter for the first time and thinking that for the first time in my life there was someone in this world that meant more to myself than me. Sounds like a horrible thing to say, I love my parents and my partner dearly but when I first saw my first born, it felt like there was another me in this world, and I think thats the best way i can describe it. 163540[/snapback] Ditto! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ted Maul 0 Posted July 23, 2006 Share Posted July 23, 2006 I know what you mean, Toonraider, I'm a very selfish person by nature, and I remember seeing my daughter for the first time and thinking that for the first time in my life there was someone in this world that meant more to myself than me. Sounds like a horrible thing to say, I love my parents and my partner dearly but when I first saw my first born, it felt like there was another me in this world, and I think thats the best way i can describe it. 163540[/snapback] Ditto! 163545[/snapback] I bet the bond with yours was due to physical stature though, Wacky Me? Kids? I'd love to have them someday but i'm far, far to young to even contemplate that at the moment. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kid Dynamite 6961 Posted July 23, 2006 Share Posted July 23, 2006 My lasses mam had her at just turned 17. Tbh im surprised my lass turned out as well-rounded and kind hearted as she has cos her mother is one of the nastiest self centred women ive met. Makes her daughter buy her lunch on payday (she earns £50 a week in the co-op), orders her to iron her clothes for work, make her dads tea etc. Its just little things but they wind me up. They had a family holiday and made her pay to go with them. Its not right! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Mighty Hog 498 Posted July 23, 2006 Share Posted July 23, 2006 Just the thought of it scares the bejesus out of me. I think it'd be a long way into the future. Sure as hell not ready for the responsibility of bringing a life into this world. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lazarus 0 Posted July 23, 2006 Share Posted July 23, 2006 Yeah, I do. Getting to a point now when I wonder if I ever will though. A combination of circumstance and medical probs means it's not as likely as it once was, but hopefully it'll happen at some point. 163457[/snapback] buy some cider and hang around bus stops! you'll be on your back in no time. me? i'd love bairns - and lots of em. no girlfriend at the moment so its kinda difficult. think i'd give one of the lads my dads name as a middle name and one of the lasses my nanas name as a middle name as well. i also reckon the celtic sounding names would go really well with my surname. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Toplass-101 Posted July 23, 2006 Share Posted July 23, 2006 Very cute babies Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
catmag 336 Posted July 23, 2006 Share Posted July 23, 2006 Yeah, I do. Getting to a point now when I wonder if I ever will though. A combination of circumstance and medical probs means it's not as likely as it once was, but hopefully it'll happen at some point. 163457[/snapback] buy some cider and hang around bus stops! you'll be on your back in no time. me? i'd love bairns - and lots of em. no girlfriend at the moment so its kinda difficult. think i'd give one of the lads my dads name as a middle name and one of the lasses my nanas name as a middle name as well. i also reckon the celtic sounding names would go really well with my surname. 163567[/snapback] You've really given it some thought, haven't you? No sproglets imminent in the Gateshead area as yet, but there are still 11 hours to go and I've probably just jinxed myself into a horrendously busy night..... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Radgina 1 Posted July 23, 2006 Share Posted July 23, 2006 Very cute babies 163592[/snapback] My God... thats a litter and a half... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Fish 10659 Posted July 23, 2006 Share Posted July 23, 2006 yup I want two boys, I think I'd be far too controlling and possesive of a girl. Obviously if the first thing that popped out was a girl I'd love it unconditionally (until the adoption papers came through ) my dad is an awesome bloke, a real hero of mine and if I can use the same methods he used in bringing me up, with a few changes here and there I think I could be a good dad too. When I was engaged a few years ago the girl I was with fell pregnant despite the "safe" sex, we discussed it and decided that we were no where near responsible enough or financially prepared to bring up a kid. Now it sounds pretty cold, but I looked at it this way, I can barely provide for myself, I'm still living with my mam and dad... how the hell could I support an entirely seperate person as well? then last year I got a phone call from the DWP declaring that a girl have asked them to contact me for child maintenance, now it turns out they got the wrong guy. But I felt a real sense of being ready to be a father. If I'm honest fatherhood is something that I think about daily (not obsessive) but it colours a lot of my choices and decisions. so in short, yeah I want kids more than anything... but only when I can offer them the kind of life all kids deserve Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kid Dynamite 6961 Posted July 23, 2006 Share Posted July 23, 2006 And you didnt sue them! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Fish 10659 Posted July 23, 2006 Share Posted July 23, 2006 And you didnt sue them! 163606[/snapback] not really any point they approached me, I told them they had the wrong guy, they took a day to rectify the problem, sent me a formal letter apologising. I hadn't suffered any trauma from it, so I couldn't see the point. I hate this letigious society we live in now where the slightest thing will result in someone seeking recompense. I'm not saying that you are typically letigious, it's just a lot of people said I should sue and even after I assured them that I had suffered no ill effects they said "Who cares? you could get a bob or two.. it's money for nothing." Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
luckyluke 2 Posted July 23, 2006 Share Posted July 23, 2006 I think I'd want a girl just for the fun of scaring the shit out of her potential boyfriends. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Fish 10659 Posted July 23, 2006 Share Posted July 23, 2006 I think I'd want a girl just for the fun of scaring the shit out of her potential boyfriends. 163615[/snapback] precisely why I wouldn't want a girl. I know I'd be the kind of Dad who would sit on a rocking chair in the porch polishing an axe.... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
NJS 4355 Posted July 23, 2006 Share Posted July 23, 2006 I think kids should be the "produce" of a relationship first and foremost. I don't trust people who start from the idea of having kids then look for a vessel/inseminator - thats the wrong way around in my view. I'm 42 and single - probably won't happen now but you never know. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
adios 717 Posted July 23, 2006 Share Posted July 23, 2006 I think kids should be the "produce" of a relationship first and foremost. I don't trust people who start from the idea of having kids then look for a vessel/inseminator - thats the wrong way around in my view. I'm 42 and single - probably won't happen now but you never know. 163629[/snapback] At least we're able to extend that decision far beyond 42 (I think you're a bloke, sorry if I'm wrong). Although that may actually be more of a curse than a blessing, as we can procrastinate until it's realistically too late anyway. I'm fast approaching 30 and it's become a bit of an issue for the girlfriend. We've recently had friends of ours visit with their 2 year old, and if that's what they're all like then I'm never having children, but I'm pretty certain they're not. Then there's the difficulty decision of whether you really see your partner as the parent of your children. I'm still not sure if I want them, but I know it's an end to my current life when I do, so it'll be a while yet, maybe when I'm mature enough to share my toys... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Fish 10659 Posted July 23, 2006 Share Posted July 23, 2006 I think kids should be the "produce" of a relationship first and foremost. I don't trust people who start from the idea of having kids then look for a vessel/inseminator - thats the wrong way around in my view. I'm 42 and single - probably won't happen now but you never know. 163629[/snapback] well that's a given. but I think having kids is a big enough deal to have influence on the partner you end up with. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
magelaide 0 Posted July 24, 2006 Author Share Posted July 24, 2006 I think I'd want a girl just for the fun of scaring the shit out of her potential boyfriends. 163615[/snapback] I was always thinking heaven help any boy I bring home to Dad, however it's the complete opposite. He isn't protective at all (well, to an extent - but not as much as I thought). I guess as long as your child is happy, you should be happy for them too. And someone has brought up the birth etc. My Mother had an extrememly complicated birth and in the end, she made the ultimate sacrifice - her life. I went through a stage where I was put off the thought of having children for life. I was terrified at the sheer thought of having to give birth. With modern technology and medicine etc, it's extreremly rare to lose either mum or bub in the birthing process. I like to view the birthing process as a contorlled (as controlled as it can be..) emergency. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sweetleftpeg 0 Posted July 24, 2006 Share Posted July 24, 2006 Me and the Mrs have discussed this a few times lately, what with the length of time we've been together and with getting hitched next year. We're kind of preparing for it, looking for a new car at the minute and looking at the practical side of needing more room for sprogs. Some of our older friends are having babies at the minute and it has made the Mrs broody. Personally, I'd rather have some selfish me and her time for a couple of more years, enjoy married life before having bairns. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rob W 0 Posted July 24, 2006 Share Posted July 24, 2006 DON'T save thousands of quid, keep a life, cheap holidays, smaller house, and 25 years of yer life......................... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Fish 10659 Posted July 24, 2006 Share Posted July 24, 2006 DON'T save thousands of quid, keep a life, cheap holidays, smaller house, and 25 years of yer life......................... 163999[/snapback] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mags 1 Posted July 24, 2006 Share Posted July 24, 2006 Have two sons here and they are definitely the best things that have ever happened to me. That bond was cemented instantly when they were born Magelaide, and like Jimbo the selfish me had to make room for the more important figures (them) and really it hasn't been any sort of sacrifice. I still go by the adage that it's good to map things out financially but you never really can afford kids... expensive as hell no matter how much you earn. And geez people. Birth is the easy part (and this is from someone who had natural births of 9+ pound kids)... the hard part is showing up for 'work' everyday for the next 18 years! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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