General Random Conversation..

[Gemmill 63006]

That includes the sheilas. 

[Renton 27742]

And the hair on their heads, not just the pubes. 

[Howmanheyman 43837]

2 hours ago, LongTimeAdmirer said:

this dickhead that looks jsut like the chook started farking working at the same place as me today,

 

couldnt stop giving him the 

 

 

then he winked at me🤦‍♀️, dumbass probably thinks i like him, fuck

 

 

 

My MiL reminds me of Steve Bruce for some weird/vague reason but I don't hold it against her.

 

Be better LTA.

[Howmanheyman 43837]

Just now, Howmanheyman said:

 

My MiL reminds me of Steve Bruce for some weird/vague reason but I don't farken hold it against her.

 

Be better LTA.

 

LTAdMP 

[Dazzler 16115]

1 hour ago, Howmanheyman said:

 

My MiL reminds me of Steve Bruce for some weird/vague reason (who was no farken John Carver and this winds me up for reasons unknown) but all I do is criticise her every move and question her motives for literally everything on the internet despite no one else giving a shit. Crikey and bloody oath.

 

 

Be better LTA. 

 

1 hour ago, Howmanheyman said:

 

LTAdMP 

 

Properly LTAdYP

[Alex 42100]

10 hours ago, Sonatine said:

Captain Tom’s family personally benefited from charity they founded, report finds

 

https://www.theguardian.com/uk-news/2024/nov/21/captain-tom-family-personally-benefited-from-charity-they-founded-report-finds?utm_source=dlvr.it&utm_medium=bluesky&CMP=bsky_gu

 

Tories 

[Toonpack 15529]

3 hours ago, Gemmill said:

That includes the sheilas. 

 

Incredible tache's

[Monkeys Fist 50629]

11 hours ago, Sonatine said:

Captain Tom’s family personally benefited from charity they founded, report finds

 

https://www.theguardian.com/uk-news/2024/nov/21/captain-tom-family-personally-benefited-from-charity-they-founded-report-finds?utm_source=dlvr.it&utm_medium=bluesky&CMP=bsky_gu

 

                           Evergreen
    Shrub        Shrub        Shrub      Shrub

 

                           Water Feature

 

      Hardy Annual    Statue    Raised Bed

 

                   Fire Pit 

                                        Pergola

[Toonpack 15529]

9 minutes ago, Monkeys Fist said:

                           Evergreen
    Shrub        Shrub        Shrub      Shrub

 

                           Water Feature

 

      Hardy Annual    Statue    Raised Bed

 

                   Fire Pit 

                                        Pergola

 

Bet it turns out the cunt wasn't even a Captain and he was only a privet

[Monkeys Fist 50629]

6 minutes ago, Toonpack said:

 

Bet it turns out the cunt wasn't even a Captain and he was only a privet

Most of the money ended up in a hedge fund. 

[Howmanheyman 43837]

[The Fish 12539]

Was carrying the little'un to the pram on the drive, my ankle gave way and I and just fucking earthsong-knee-dropped onto the concrete off the bottom step. Knees are fucked.  

 

 

 

The wife called me a dickhead, the baby thought it was a right laugh, hastily deleted the scene from the Ring doorbell. 

[Howmanheyman 43837]

33 minutes ago, The Fish said:

Was carrying the little'un to the pram on the drive, my ankle gave way and I and just fucking earthsong-knee-dropped onto the concrete off the bottom step. Knees are fucked.  

 

 

 

The wife called me a dickhead, the baby thought it was a right laugh, hastily deleted the scene from the Ring doorbell. 

 

Fish: "Aaaaarghhhh! Aaaaarghhhh!!"

 

Mrs Fish: "Are you alright?"

 

Fish: Aaaaarghhhh!!..... Aaaaarghhhh!!......The pain!!!!.......Aaaaarghhhh!!!!...... I'll tell you in a minute darling, I'm just hastily deleting the scene from our poncey ring bell......Aaaaarghhhh!! ...... Aaaaarghhhh!!...... Nearly done it.......Aaaaarghhhh!! Aaaaarghhhh!!.....there you go...... Deleted....... Aaaaarghhhh!!!!"

[Renton 27742]

20 minutes ago, Howmanheyman said:

 

Fish: "Aaaaarghhhh! Aaaaarghhhh!!"

 

Mrs Fish: "Are you alright?"

 

Fish: Aaaaarghhhh!!..... Aaaaarghhhh!!......The pain!!!!.......Aaaaarghhhh!!!!...... I'll tell you in a minute darling, I'm just hastily deleting the scene from our poncey ring bell......Aaaaarghhhh!! ...... Aaaaarghhhh!!...... Nearly done it.......Aaaaarghhhh!! Aaaaarghhhh!!.....there you go...... Deleted....... Aaaaarghhhh!!!!"

 

" Aarrrghhhh! The pain, the fucking pain. Aarrrghhhh! Aarrrghhhh! Must.... Aarrrghhhh!... Must... Just one minute! Aarrrghhhh! Must now get this little funny anecdote posted on Toontastic. Aarrrghhhh!..... "

[ewerk 39152]

All while doing the Steven Taylor fall to his knees in slow motion.

[Howmanheyman 43837]

6 minutes ago, ewerk said:

All while doing the Steven Taylor fall to his knees in slow motion.

 

The fish nearly into the house after the accident, nearly, so close but couldn't quite get over the threshold before the agony finally proved too much.....

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

"I..... I can't make it darling.....aaaarrrghhhh!!!...

..... delete the ring bell video and the money's in the biscuit tin......aaaarrrgghhhhh!! Farewell my love!"

[ewerk 39152]

Finishing with:

 

[ewerk 39152]

Toontastic: Officially not the place to come for sympathy 

[Ayatollah Hermione 17233]

I’m picturing Fish falling down as fast as Peter Griffin 

[Alex 42100]

1 hour ago, The Fish said:

Was carrying the little'un to the pram on the drive, my ankle gave way and I and just fucking earthsong-knee-dropped onto the concrete off the bottom step. Knees are fucked.  

 

 

 

The wife called me a dickhead, the baby thought it was a right laugh, hastily deleted the scene from the Ring doorbell. 

U ok, hun? 

[Gemmill 63006]

There's nothing funny about a sprained ankle, lads. NOTHING. 

[Renton 27742]

1 hour ago, Howmanheyman said:

 

The fish nearly into the house after the accident, nearly, so close but couldn't quite get over the threshold before the agony finally proved too much.....

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

"I..... I can't make it darling.....aaaarrrghhhh!!!...

..... delete the ring bell video and the money's in the biscuit tin......aaaarrrgghhhhh!! Farewell my love!"

 

"My love" [weak voice, croak] "My sweet, sweet love, promise me one thing?" 

 

"Ffs, yes Dave?" [derisive sigh] 

 

"Before I pass into the unknown, arghhhh, will you do one thing for me?" 

 

"Ffs, what, I've got aerobics in half an hour" 

 

" Will you press that button on my phone for me......." Last breath, fades to black. 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

[Isegrim 11881]

I have been staying at home for over a week now with torn muscle in my right calf. It’s actually annoying as fuck and I am thinking of changing my name to Elena or Kieron.

[Toonpack 15529]

39 minutes ago, Isegrim said:

I have been staying at home for over a week now with torn muscle in my right calf. It’s actually annoying as fuck and I am thinking of changing my name to Elena or Kieron.

House arrest, how very Gestapo

[Gemmill 63006]

There's been another TT faller. Out for a headtorch run at 5 this morning. Caught my foot on a rock sticking out of the path. Skinned my hands, knee, and smacked my head so a nice little egg on that too.

 

Most annoyingly scratched fuck out of my new Garmin. 

 

Still no broken bones though, @thebrokendoll. 48 and never broken a bone.