Gemmill 51647 Posted September 28, 2024 Share Posted September 28, 2024 What the fuck is going on at the met. I know you get bad apples everywhere, but these are turning up the worst kind of wrongun every few months. 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Toonpack 11916 Posted September 28, 2024 Share Posted September 28, 2024 (edited) On 28/09/2024 at 12:31, Gemmill said: What the fuck is going on at the met. I know you get bad apples everywhere, but these are turning up the worst kind of wrongun every few months. Expand I have a couple of mates who were Northumbria plod, a force that used to be hard to get into (no idea what it’s like now) they always said those who can’t get in join the Met “they’ll take anyone”. Young lad I worked with proved the point, tried Northumbria and got bombed out, he joined the Met (he wasn’t a waster/wrong’un himself mind). Edited September 28, 2024 by Toonpack 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
wykikitoon 23476 Posted September 28, 2024 Share Posted September 28, 2024 On 28/09/2024 at 14:26, Toonpack said: I have a couple of mates who were Northumbria plod, a force that used to be hard to get into (no idea what it’s like now) they always said those who can’t get in join the Met “they’ll take anyone”. Young lad I worked with proved the point, tried Northumbria and got bombed out, he joined the Met (he wasn’t a waster/wrong’un himself mind). Expand Police take any cunt now Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
wykikitoon 23476 Posted September 28, 2024 Share Posted September 28, 2024 Wor Lass has just said to me 'we've got a Newcastle office, what's your thoughts on moving here' I've told her I'll put the house up for sale tomorrow 4 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Toonpack 11916 Posted September 29, 2024 Share Posted September 29, 2024 Darras Hall and next door to Wilson may be a bit out of your price range Wyki 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Monkeys Fist 45892 Posted September 29, 2024 Share Posted September 29, 2024 On 28/09/2024 at 20:32, wykikitoon said: Wor Lass has just said to me 'we've got a Newcastle office, what's your thoughts on moving here' I've told her I'll put the house up for sale tomorrow Expand I can recommend a great elocution tutor if you make the move- Tadger Armstrong, lives in Percy Main. Mrs. W. is a Scab, isn’t she? No worries- much like Callum, he does couples too. 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dr Gloom 24045 Posted September 29, 2024 Share Posted September 29, 2024 On 26/09/2024 at 09:47, Renton said: Talking of poop, any tips on how to collect it for this colon screening test? The test specifically says do not let the sample be contaminated with toilet water. So I carefully laid down TP in order to catch it, but it was so strong and magnificant it just went straight through it. I'll need another 12 hours for another attempt. PLEASE DO NOT THINK OF THIS BEFORE YOU HAVE YOUR LUNCH BAIT. Just saying. Expand Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dr Gloom 24045 Posted September 29, 2024 Share Posted September 29, 2024 On 26/09/2024 at 10:23, Monkeys Fist said: That’s the one with a little swab stick that you need to wipe on your shite, aye? Unless you’re pulling Aces at every drop, you’re focusing on the wrong source material Let your brown trout flush away and give your hoop a quick flyby with the swab, then commence the clean up operation in your filthy sitter manner. Expand fucking hell lads, it’s too early to be reading this 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dazzler 12354 Posted September 29, 2024 Share Posted September 29, 2024 On 29/09/2024 at 07:41, Dr Gloom said: fucking hell lads, it’s too early to be reading this Expand Or about three days late 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Monkeys Fist 45892 Posted September 29, 2024 Share Posted September 29, 2024 On 29/09/2024 at 07:45, Dazzler said: Or about three days late Expand Give him a break- he’s had to attend his Coronation … … I think that’s what he meant when he said, ” Fuck me , I’m crowning! “ 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dr Gloom 24045 Posted September 29, 2024 Share Posted September 29, 2024 On 29/09/2024 at 07:45, Dazzler said: Or about three days late Expand some of us have subjects to attend to 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dr Gloom 24045 Posted September 29, 2024 Share Posted September 29, 2024 On 29/09/2024 at 07:49, Monkeys Fist said: Give him a break- he’s had to attend his Coronation … … I think that’s what he meant when he said, ” Fuck me , I’m crowning! “ Expand which reminds me, i just had my morning coffee so I will soon be in need of the royal wiper 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RobinRobin 12742 Posted September 29, 2024 Share Posted September 29, 2024 On 29/09/2024 at 07:54, Dr Gloom said: which reminds me, i just had my morning coffee so I will soon be in need of the royal wiper Expand Gloom of the Stool? 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dr Gloom 24045 Posted September 29, 2024 Share Posted September 29, 2024 On 29/09/2024 at 08:15, RobinRobin said: Gloom of the Stool? Expand kiss the ring 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
wykikitoon 23476 Posted September 29, 2024 Share Posted September 29, 2024 On 29/09/2024 at 07:02, Monkeys Fist said: I can recommend a great elocution tutor if you make the move- Tadger Armstrong, lives in Percy Main. Mrs. W. is a Scab, isn’t she? No worries- much like Callum, he does couples too. Expand Beat the scab out of her years ago. 😝 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RobinRobin 12742 Posted September 30, 2024 Share Posted September 30, 2024 On 29/09/2024 at 11:05, Dr Gloom said: kiss the ring Expand 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
wykikitoon 23476 Posted September 30, 2024 Share Posted September 30, 2024 Got home after a mega weekend in the Toon. Walking out of Leeds station and a group of piss heads just deciding to have a piss on the concourse. Nice. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dr Gloom 24045 Posted September 30, 2024 Share Posted September 30, 2024 pissheads gonna piss 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Fish 11379 Posted October 1, 2024 Share Posted October 1, 2024 (edited) On 28/09/2024 at 20:32, wykikitoon said: Wor Lass has just said to me 'we've got a Newcastle office, what's your thoughts on moving here' I've told her I'll put the house up for sale tomorrow Expand You could buy my Mam and Dad's house off them? Edited October 1, 2024 by The Fish Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
wykikitoon 23476 Posted October 1, 2024 Share Posted October 1, 2024 On 01/10/2024 at 12:44, The Fish said: You could buy my Mam and Dad's house off them? Expand We got home yesterday and I asked the wife last night whether she still fancied moving. She said yes! I really don't know if I cba moving and changing companies tbh. I love the idea of being up in Newcastle but it would mean moving away from my nieces and nephews who I enjoy seeing. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gemmill 51647 Posted October 1, 2024 Share Posted October 1, 2024 Your nieces and nephews said it's fine. 8 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Fish 11379 Posted October 1, 2024 Share Posted October 1, 2024 On 01/10/2024 at 12:59, wykikitoon said: We got home yesterday and I asked the wife last night whether she still fancied moving. She said yes! I really don't know if I cba moving and changing companies tbh. I love the idea of being up in Newcastle but it would mean moving away from my nieces and nephews who I enjoy seeing. Expand Moving is a piece of piss if you pay someone to do it all for you. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ewerk 33727 Posted October 1, 2024 Share Posted October 1, 2024 And measure your doorways. 4 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Toonpack 11916 Posted October 1, 2024 Share Posted October 1, 2024 Nearly as easy as ordering domestic appliances 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
wykikitoon 23476 Posted October 1, 2024 Share Posted October 1, 2024 Got his dinner in his jowls. Fuck me he's looking rough is T'old willy Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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