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Scottish Mag

By Scottish Mag,
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Renton
Renton

An update. I feel so fortunate. Back at home with the family, had a very long and frank discussion with Mrs Rents. She'll continue supporting me as long as I don't drink, which is obviously fair enoug

Alex
Alex

Had a couple a nights away in Keswick, got back yesterday morning. As is often the case I usually wake up at daft o’clock when I’m not at home in my own bed. Preoccupied with thoughts of today’s match

trophyshy
trophyshy

Last night I was sitting in the lounge minding my own business after the kids were put to bed.  I had the big light on.  Wor lass walked into the room and turned the big light off, fuck knows why.   S

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spongebob toonpants

spongebob toonpants 4183

Posted
Posted

And the Easter break begins with me sitting in a wheelchair in A&E

Knee had been hurting a bit so went the doctors expecting him to say rest up, here are some hefty painkillers. Maybe a bit of strapping or antibiotics for an infection

Did not want to here either of these phrases.

Go straight to A&E

Or

May need to clean that knee out.

Happy Easter

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Alex

Alex 35916

Posted
Posted
5 minutes ago, spongebob toonpants said:

And the Easter break begins with me sitting in a wheelchair in A&E

Knee had been hurting a bit so went the doctors expecting him to say rest up, here are some hefty painkillers. Maybe a bit of strapping or antibiotics for an infection

Did not want to here either of these phrases.

Go straight to A&E

Or

May need to clean that knee out.

Happy Easter

Hope you get seen to quickly, mate. 

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Monkeys Fist

Monkeys Fist 43591

Posted
Posted

:lol:
Hope all goes well mate. 
 

 

I had a lump taken off my knee a few years ago (2013)which resulted in me posting this on a popular (at the time) social media app

 

” So, I go to bed extremely early this evening, feeling the onset of Man Flu, at about 7:30. 
Woken half an hour later by the combination of hearing my son (3 at the time)in the bathroom doing a superb rendition of The Exorcist vomit scene, and my stomach letting me know that I'm seconds away from recreating Willy Wonka's chocolate waterfall. 
I dash to bathroom, where I am barred from entry by my wife , holding our son over the pan as he pukes for England. 
Minutes pass, sweat breaks out on my forehead. My A-hole is doing a better job than King Canute, but I'm now formulating emergency plans ( the bath). 
Luckily son dries up, I move in…
and realise that I will have to sit sideways on the Thunderbox as my knee ( recently operated on), will not bend sufficiently to allow me to sit normally. 
This also means I have to cup the Man Apples to avoid crushing them twixt thigh and newly narrow bog seat. 
So there I am, sideways on, leg stuck out straight, holding my knackers as the world falls out of my bottom. “
 

Hope this brightens your day :lol:

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ewerk

ewerk 31589

Posted
Posted
15 minutes ago, Monkeys Fist said:

:lol:
Hope all goes well mate. 
 

 

I had a lump taken off my knee a few years ago (2013)which resulted in me posting this on a popular (at the time) social media app

 

” So, I go to bed extremely early this evening, feeling the onset of Man Flu, at about 7:30. 
Woken half an hour later by the combination of hearing my son (3 at the time)in the bathroom doing a superb rendition of The Exorcist vomit scene, and my stomach letting me know that I'm seconds away from recreating Willy Wonka's chocolate waterfall. 
I dash to bathroom, where I am barred from entry by my wife , holding our son over the pan as he pukes for England. 
Minutes pass, sweat breaks out on my forehead. My A-hole is doing a better job than King Canute, but I'm now formulating emergency plans ( the bath). 
Luckily son dries up, I move in…
and realise that I will have to sit sideways on the Thunderbox as my knee ( recently operated on), will not bend sufficiently to allow me to sit normally. 
This also means I have to cup the Man Apples to avoid crushing them twixt thigh and newly narrow bog seat. 
So there I am, sideways on, leg stuck out straight, holding my knackers as the world falls out of my bottom. “
 

Hope this brightens your day :lol:


Aye but did you wipe sitting after?

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Toonpack

Toonpack 10393

Posted
Posted
1 hour ago, spongebob toonpants said:

And the Easter break begins with me sitting in a wheelchair in A&E

Knee had been hurting a bit so went the doctors expecting him to say rest up, here are some hefty painkillers. Maybe a bit of strapping or antibiotics for an infection

Did not want to here either of these phrases.

Go straight to A&E

Or

May need to clean that knee out.

Happy Easter


All the best SpongeBob nopants

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strawb

strawb 4461

Posted
Posted
27 minutes ago, Monkeys Fist said:


No. 
 

I’m not a savage, ffs. :lol:

I’m assuming you pissed all over the floor? Shitting without pissing is blasphemous 

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Howmanheyman

Howmanheyman 34434

Posted
Posted
1 hour ago, spongebob toonpants said:

And the Easter break begins with me sitting in a wheelchair in A&E

Knee had been hurting a bit so went the doctors expecting him to say rest up, here are some hefty painkillers. Maybe a bit of strapping or antibiotics for an infection

Did not want to here either of these phrases.

Go straight to A&E

Or

May need to clean that knee out.

Happy Easter

 

Hope it doesn't turn out serious, SpongeBob. 👍

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spongebob toonpants

spongebob toonpants 4183

Posted
Posted

5 hours later I’ve ended up with antibiotics, painkillers and instructions to rest

 

Knees are a bit of a mess but nothing too bad for a geriatric who spent years playing Sunday League football, falling off motorbikes and falling downstairs drunk

 

Hospital a bit bemused they didn’t just prescribe antibiotics on the spot as they’d had to get rid of the infection anyway, but still a relief they didnt immediately reach for the scalpel

 

No alcohol til I’m finished the drug course, which has taken the wind out of my Easter plans

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Monkeys Fist

Monkeys Fist 43591

Posted
Posted
1 minute ago, spongebob toonpants said:

No alcohol til I’m finished the drug course, which has taken the wind out of my Easter plans

Just nick a wheelchair, get on the lash from now until Monday, then start the antibiotics. 
 

Happy Easter :lol:
 

 

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RobinRobin

RobinRobin 11805

Posted
Posted
On 03/04/2023 at 19:00, RobinRobin said:

May as well be given fucking Chrome seems to freeze on EVERY FUCKING PAGE - DUDE! 

🙂

Just updated Chrome again and seems much better 🙂 

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