Monkeys Fist 42417 Posted February 13, 2023 Share Posted February 13, 2023 1 hour ago, Alex said: Is that Roger Waters? Both rancid old cunts? 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Toonpack 9399 Posted February 13, 2023 Share Posted February 13, 2023 Funny, for an ad Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RobinRobin 11263 Posted February 14, 2023 Share Posted February 14, 2023 8 hours ago, Renton said: Alternatively..... It's Sunday 26th February, around 7pm in NW London, UK. Alain St Maximim has just score a last minute winner in the last added minute of extra time to win NUFC the League cup against their bitter red Manc opponents, ending a 53 year trophy drought (or 68 years if you're a mackem), and earning trophyshy a name change and several posters the anticipation of a tea bagging session with the reluctant hero. The ref blows the whistle, a tidal wave of euphoria passes through the ecstatic black and white crowds as Bruno raise his arms aloft. It's finally happened. Then suddenly there is an ominous humming in the air and the sky goes dark and cold..... Ahh fuck man. Typical. At least we won. 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Fish 10856 Posted February 14, 2023 Share Posted February 14, 2023 Telling that even in Renton's wildest imaginings, we barely scrape by Man Utd. 1 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Fish 10856 Posted February 14, 2023 Share Posted February 14, 2023 (edited) Settle something for me; Wife works in HR, shes just been asked if it's ok for the CEO to say in his speech to a senior director who's leaving the following "XXX often says that she likes her coffee like she likes her men; hot, black and throbbing" Now, bad writing aside, Mrs Fish thinks it should be ok if you change 'black' to 'dark'. My contention is 'black' isn't the problem, it's the "Throbbing". 'Hot, black and strong' is a fairly commonplace innuendo. 'Hot black and throbbing' is not innuendo, it's very clearly about a penis. Because penises can throb, coffee doesn't throb. Ever. Edited February 14, 2023 by The Fish Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Isegrim 9772 Posted February 14, 2023 Share Posted February 14, 2023 1 minute ago, The Fish said: Settle something for me; Wife works in HR, shes just been asked if it's ok for the CEO to say in his speech to a senior director who's leaving the following "XXX often says that she likes her coffee like she likes her men; hot, black and throbbing" Now, bad writing aside, Mrs Fish thinks it should be ok if you change 'black' to 'dark'. My contention is 'black' isn't the problem, it's the "Throbbing". 'Hot, black and strong' is a fairly commonplace innuendo. 'Hot black and throbbing' is not innuendo, it's very clearly about a penis. Because penises can throb, coffee doesn't throb. Ever. Is she working for the BBC? 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Meenzer 15524 Posted February 14, 2023 Share Posted February 14, 2023 That's just bad writing, quite aside from any offensive connotations EDIT: Oh aye, you mentioned that. Well, that's still what offends me the most. 1 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Meenzer 15524 Posted February 14, 2023 Share Posted February 14, 2023 Now, if it was "hot, black, and making a mess all down her front"... 5 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Toonpack 9399 Posted February 14, 2023 Share Posted February 14, 2023 2 hours ago, The Fish said: Settle something for me; Wife works in HR, shes just been asked if it's ok for the CEO to say in his speech to a senior director who's leaving the following "XXX often says that she likes her coffee like she likes her men; hot, black and throbbing" Now, bad writing aside, Mrs Fish thinks it should be ok if you change 'black' to 'dark'. My contention is 'black' isn't the problem, it's the "Throbbing". 'Hot, black and strong' is a fairly commonplace innuendo. 'Hot black and throbbing' is not innuendo, it's very clearly about a penis. Because penises can throb, coffee doesn't throb. Ever. Just no, not on any level is that appropriate 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Monkeys Fist 42417 Posted February 14, 2023 Share Posted February 14, 2023 2 hours ago, Meenzer said: Now, if it was "hot, black, and making a mess all down her front"... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Andrew 4748 Posted February 14, 2023 Share Posted February 14, 2023 1 hour ago, Toonpack said: Just no, not on any level is that appropriate Absolutely, if its a small gathering of the upper management who they all know personally and that sort of shit flies...fine I guess, its still a shite line but if its audience is a known quantity then they'll get away with it at least. If thats being made to a gathering of the company as a whole, just no. There are plenty of crap jokes to make that aren't innuendos about the sort of dicks she likes to take that run the risk of fairly reasonable complaints of both sexism and racism from those hearing it. That sort of shite should not be coming out of the CEOs mouth to their staff. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Isegrim 9772 Posted February 14, 2023 Share Posted February 14, 2023 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gemmill 44853 Posted February 14, 2023 Share Posted February 14, 2023 Coffee doesn't throb. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kid Dynamite 7025 Posted February 14, 2023 Share Posted February 14, 2023 (edited) 27 minutes ago, Gemmill said: Coffee doesn't throb. Quite true It's a shite, 90s, Michael Scott esque joke that would probably get you a disciplinary hearing in the NHS Edited February 14, 2023 by Kid Dynamite Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Renton 21614 Posted February 14, 2023 Share Posted February 14, 2023 (edited) 1 hour ago, Gemmill said: Coffee doesn't throb. Does anybody ever bother to read what Fish posts? Anyway, how about hot, black, and up her arse? And yes, this does make sense, just ask Gwyneth Paltrow. https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Coffee_enema Edited February 14, 2023 by Renton 6 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sammynb 3355 Posted February 15, 2023 Share Posted February 15, 2023 2 hours ago, Renton said: Does anybody ever bother to read what Fish posts? Anyway, how about hot, black, and up her arse? And yes, this does make sense, just ask Gwyneth Paltrow. https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Coffee_enema Yeah, don’t think it is hot when they push it up Gwyneth’s arse, most likely iced, chai’d and latte’d! Fish’s missus CEO is obviously looking for early retirement if he thinks that line is going to fly. He may as well starting handing out the polaroids of her gargling said black balls, just to make sure he didn’t miss anyone. 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RobinRobin 11263 Posted February 15, 2023 Share Posted February 15, 2023 4 hours ago, Renton said: Does anybody ever bother to read what Fish posts? 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Howmanheyman 33173 Posted February 15, 2023 Share Posted February 15, 2023 The CEO with the shit patter should start off normal then take it up a notch from there..... ".....And now finally, last but not least, it's time for us all to say a fond farewell to our beloved senior director Miss xxx. Miss xxx is of course fond of cooking in her spare time which all of us who've sampled her delights when she's brought cakes in will know all too well, in fact she's gladly gave me a recipe to share with you all for her speciality, salty chocolate balls. It is as follows; Two tablespoons of cinnamon And two or three egg whites A half a stick of butter Melt it Stick it all in a bowl, baby Stir it with a wooden spoon Mix in a cup of flour You'll be in heaven ........[starts singing] 🎵sooooooon......yeah!!!! [Pulls down his pants, gets his cock out] Say everybody have you seen my balls? They're big and salty and brown If you ever need a quick pick me up Just stick my balls in your mouth Oooh, suck on my chocolate salty balls Stick 'em in your mouth, and suck 'em! Suck on my chocolate salty balls They're packed full of vitamins and good for you So suck on my balls! 🎶 6 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Monkeys Fist 42417 Posted February 15, 2023 Share Posted February 15, 2023 Also, she’s called Miss XXX. How long has the Mrs. been HR for Pornhub , Fish? 4 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RobinRobin 11263 Posted February 15, 2023 Share Posted February 15, 2023 17 minutes ago, Howmanheyman said: The CEO with the shit patter should start off normal then take it up a notch from there..... ".....And now finally, last but not least, it's time for us all to say a fond farewell to our beloved senior director Miss xxx. Miss xxx is of course fond of cooking in her spare time which all of us who've sampled her delights when she's brought cakes in will know all too well, in fact she's gladly gave me a recipe to share with you all for her speciality, salty chocolate balls. It is as follows; Two tablespoons of cinnamon And two or three egg whites A half a stick of butter Melt it Stick it all in a bowl, baby Stir it with a wooden spoon Mix in a cup of flour You'll be in heaven ........[starts singing] 🎵sooooooon......yeah!!!! [Pulls down his pants, gets his cock out] Say everybody have you seen my balls? They're big and salty and brown If you ever need a quick pick me up Just stick my balls in your mouth Oooh, suck on my chocolate salty balls Stick 'em in your mouth, and suck 'em! Suck on my chocolate salty balls They're packed full of vitamins and good for you So suck on my balls! 🎶 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
wykikitoon 20129 Posted February 15, 2023 Share Posted February 15, 2023 This lass who's gone missing. It's gonna be the husband aint it? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Isegrim 9772 Posted February 15, 2023 Share Posted February 15, 2023 3 minutes ago, wykikitoon said: This lass who's gone missing. It's gonna be the husband aint it? Or someone from HR. 7 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Fish 10856 Posted February 15, 2023 Share Posted February 15, 2023 3 hours ago, Monkeys Fist said: Also, she’s called Miss XXX. How long has the Mrs. been HR for Pornhub , Fish? Tried to shoehorn in a premature ejaculation joke, but no luck. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Alex 35077 Posted February 15, 2023 Share Posted February 15, 2023 (edited) 2 hours ago, wykikitoon said: This lass who's gone missing. It's gonna be the husband aint it? You mean her current partner or her ex? I think I read the kids are from a previous relationship. I know, they’re both highly likely to be her ex at this point. But you know what I mean Edited February 15, 2023 by Alex Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kid Dynamite 7025 Posted February 15, 2023 Share Posted February 15, 2023 2 hours ago, wykikitoon said: This lass who's gone missing. It's gonna be the husband aint it? He must have a cast iron alibi if they haven't pointed the finger at him yet Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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