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Scottish Mag
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7 minutes ago, NJS said:

I'm smart homed to fuck - had that bug for years and this year I upgraded from x-10 to z-wave. All controlled by a pc and alexa enabled including lights, cameras and all AV equipment. 

 

Still need to do my central heating though. 

 

 

Nice one, this is my new thing. The Nest thing is not cheap like but by the sound of it it saves you money in the long run. Heating that self adjusts cos it knows what the weather is going is canny clever. 

A mate at work set his all up himself with something called Tado, but I'm not confident enough to be wiring shit in to my boiler. 

I'm ignoring CT, safe in the knowledge he'll be back on here a year from now begging for someone to help him set some smart shit up. 

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1 minute ago, Christmas Tree said:

 

Years ago you and your hoovers were at the forefront. What went wrong. :lol: 

If you've got one of the new Roombas, that's controllable by Alexa now too. You can set it up to hoover every time you leave the house and stuff. 

Edited by Gemmill
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5 minutes ago, Christmas Tree said:


Other than football streams I can’t really say we watch any live TV. Might work? Works on all streamed stuff (Netflix / prime etc)

 

You generally need  a hard drive to pause live TV. We've gone to very cheap broadband and freeview but miss the ability to pause etc...

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1 minute ago, PaddockLad said:

 

You generally need  a hard drive to pause live TV. We've gone to very cheap broadband and freeview but miss the ability to pause etc...

Freeview + is what you're after. Your telly might allow you to stick a USB stick in as a storage device. 

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3 minutes ago, PaddockLad said:

 

You generally need  a hard drive to pause live TV. We've gone to very cheap broadband and freeview but miss the ability to pause etc...


Just tried it through the apps on fire cube and it works. So you would probably need to be watching live to through iPlayer or itv hub etc

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I think tubs is right on this one, it's just not worth the hassle setting this shit up and dealing with the inevitable maintenance and software issues. I had my my house rewired a couple of years ago and have hardly any pendant fittings, but most my lights have dimmer switches. Got the central heating done and got 2 nest controllers, one for upstairs and one for downstairs (believe you have to have a dual system nowadays).It's okay, but when you're wfh all day I don't think it saves you money. Nest can't control individual radiators although I believe Hive can?

I fucking hate Bezos and Amazon too so Alexa can fuck herself. Having said that I'm so embedded with Google now I might consider getting a Google hub to serve as an electronic picture frame and music system, if nowt else. 

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2 hours ago, Gemmill said:

but I'm not confident enough to be wiring shit in to my boiler. 

You just replace your current control panel with the new controller. Granted I had an electrician in anyway so got him to do it but I could have done it easily.

Honestly, not having one is like living in the stone age.

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20 hours ago, Gemmill said:

Anyone got any Smart Home shit going on? 

The storm last week killed my doorbell so I bought a Ring Video one to replace it. Then got the bug and bought a Ring security system (alarm basically) which arrives tomorrow, along with a camera spotlight for the back garden. (my wanker old school alarm needs a service and they want me to pay £300 for a three year contract, when I can get a full Ring system for cheaper and no service bullshit to deal with). 

And I've ordered a quote for installing Nest to control the heating. 

And I bought my first smart lightbulbs, although that one is cos I let my lass measure for a cabinet in the spare room, and she measured so that the cabinet completely covers the light switch. Where if I just replace the light bulb with a smart one, I can tell Alexa to turn the fucker on (or use my phone), taking the switch right out of the game. 

Who's with me? 

If nothing else, CT is about to drop 2 grand after reading this post. 

 

 

Get the IFTTT app. It stands for "If this, then that" and it's a pretty user friendly way of automating your devices which works with loads of the smart tech brands. Expands the programming options you've got within the existing apps. Useful stuff like 'If my phone gets within 100 meters of the house, turn on the lights'. 'If my phone leaves that area, turn off these lights, turn off the heating, turn on the alarm and release the hounds'. 'If I say "Movie night" turn down the lights, set the audio system to this setting, open Amazon Prime', lock the doors. etc. 

 

The smart thermostats are useful and can save you money (if used right). Smart blinds that gently open with the sunrise are cool. Smart Locks give you added security (mate has them purely because his girlfriend is forever locking herself out, so rather than schlepping home from the office to let her in, he pushes a button on his phone and et voila.

 

After the Kitchen gets paid for, my next project is getting more smart home tech up in this hizzouse. Definitely getting a video doorbell for the added security and the ability to tell the courier not to take the package next door because she's a cunt and I can't be arsed with the 20 minute diatribe about the proposed speed bumps.

 

Like Rayvin says, that's the way the world is going, so resisting it is like holding onto your Nokia3210 because you 'just need a phone that calls and texts'.

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20 hours ago, Gemmill said:

Anyone got any Smart Home shit going on? 

The storm last week killed my doorbell so I bought a Ring Video one to replace it. Then got the bug and bought a Ring security system (alarm basically) which arrives tomorrow, along with a camera spotlight for the back garden. (my wanker old school alarm needs a service and they want me to pay £300 for a three year contract, when I can get a full Ring system for cheaper and no service bullshit to deal with). 

And I've ordered a quote for installing Nest to control the heating. 

And I bought my first smart lightbulbs, although that one is cos I let my lass measure for a cabinet in the spare room, and she measured so that the cabinet completely covers the light switch. Where if I just replace the light bulb with a smart one, I can tell Alexa to turn the fucker on (or use my phone), taking the switch right out of the game. 

Who's with me? 

If nothing else, CT is about to drop 2 grand after reading this post. 


We have Hive thermostat and had it for about 4 years now.  Brilliant stuff and reduced our heating bills.  Not drastically, but enough.

I've got camera's too and I also have my house alarm on an app.  

A couple of months ago I got smart bulbs which I have set of daylight which is well cool.

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18 hours ago, Renton said:

I think tubs is right on this one, it's just not worth the hassle setting this shit up and dealing with the inevitable maintenance and software issues. I had my my house rewired a couple of years ago and have hardly any pendant fittings, but most my lights have dimmer switches. Got the central heating done and got 2 nest controllers, one for upstairs and one for downstairs (believe you have to have a dual system nowadays).It's okay, but when you're wfh all day I don't think it saves you money. Nest can't control individual radiators although I believe Hive can?

I fucking hate Bezos and Amazon too so Alexa can fuck herself. Having said that I'm so embedded with Google now I might consider getting a Google hub to serve as an electronic picture frame and music system, if nowt else. 

Setting it up? 90% of it is plugging the thing in and connecting it to your wifi. The only hassle is when you change internet service provider and have to remember to update all the doohickeys. Amazon's good for that, I update one and it'll spread the news to every Alexa device I have. I have 1 Show, 1 Echo, 3 Dots, 2 Fire Tv sticks and when I switched to Vodafone fibre I just told the Show what to do and the rest fell in line. 

 

I set reminders, video call my folks, listen to music, send messages, follow recipes, watch tv, check the news, all by having a chat with the nice lady in the box. 

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Digressing from hi-tech, a Twitter thread and some Googling has this morning led me to the conclusion:

Dolphins are intelligent kill for pleasure psychopaths (I sort of knew that bit)

Ducks are serial and violent rapists

Otters are the cute animal kingdom answer to Dennis Nielsen and partial to murder, rape and corpse shagging

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I've got a couple of wifi enabled bulbs on my porch light. Never use the wifi function on them but they came with the light. The annoying thing is that when they disconnect from wifi they end up flashing like fucking disco lights.

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7 minutes ago, ewerk said:

I've got a couple of wifi enabled bulbs on my porch light. Never use the wifi function on them but they came with the light. The annoying thing is that when they disconnect from wifi they end up flashing like fucking disco lights.

You should pass that tip on to Downing Street, “there was no party it was the wi-fi lights”

Edited by Toonpack
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