geordieshandy 0 Posted August 18, 2005 Share Posted August 18, 2005 No trouble, just don't go around in a large coat with a rucksack Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jonny_nufc 0 Posted August 18, 2005 Share Posted August 18, 2005 No trouble, just don't go around in a large coat with a rucksack 14639[/snapback] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jonny_nufc 0 Posted August 18, 2005 Share Posted August 18, 2005 Many Sydney folks DID hear this on the FOX FM morning show in Sydney. The DJs play a game where they award winners great prizes. The game is called "Mate Match". The DJs call someone at work and ask if they are married or seriously involved with someone. If the contestant answers "yes", he or she is then asked 3 random yet highly personal questions. The person is also asked to divulge the name of their partner (with phone number) for verification. If their partner answers those same three questions correctly, they both win the prize. One particular game, however, several months ago made the City of Big Shoulders drop to its knees with laughter. Here's how it all went down: DJ: "Hey! This is Ed on FOX-FM. Have you ever heard of 'Mate Match'?" Contestant: (laughing) "Yes, I have." DJ: "Great! Then you know we're giving away a trip to the Gold Coast if you win. What is your name? First only please." Contestant: "Brian." DJ: "Brian, are you married or what?" Brian: (laughing nervously) "Yes, I am married." DJ: "Thank you. Now, what is your wife's name? First only please." Brian: "Sara." DJ: "Is Sara at work, Brian?" Brian: "She is gonna kill me." DJ: "Stay with me here, Brian! Is she at work?" Brian: (laughing) "Yes, she's at work." DJ: "Okay, first question - when was the last time you had sex?" Brian: "About 8 o'clock this morning." DJ: "Atta boy, Brian." Brian: (laughing sheepishly) "Well..." DJ: "Question #2 - How long did it last?" Brian: "About 10 minutes." DJ: "Wow! You really want that trip, huh? No one would ever have said that if a trip wasn't at stake." Brian: "Yeah, that trip sure would be nice." DJ: "Okay. Final question. Where did you have sex at 8 o'clock this morning? Brian: (laughing hard) "I, ummm, I, well..." DJ: "This sounds good, Brian. Where was it at?" Brian: "Not that it was all that great, but her mum is staying with us for a couple of weeks..." DJ: "Uh huh..." Brian: "...and the Mother-In-Law was in the shower at the time." DJ: "Atta boy, Brian." Brian: "On the kitchen table." DJ: "Not that great?? That is more adventurous than the previous hundred times I've done it. Okay folks, I will put Brian on hold, get his wife's work number and call her up. You listen to this." [ 3 minutes of commercials follow. ] DJ: "Okay audience; let's call Sara, shall we?" (Touch tones.....ringing....) Clerk: "Kinkos." DJ: "Hey, is Sara around there somewhere?" Clerk: "This is she." DJ: "Sara, this is Ed with FOX-FM. We are live on the air right now and I've been talking with Brian for a couple of hours now." Sara: (laughing) "A couple of hours?" DJ: "Well, a while now. He is on the line with us. Brian knows not to give any answers away or you'll lose. Sooooooo... do you know the rules of 'Mate Match'?" Sara: "No." DJ: "Good!" Brian: (laughing) Sara: (laughing) "Brian, what the hell are you up to?" Brian: (laughing) "Just answer his questions honestly, okay? Be completely honest." DJ: "Yeah yeah yeah. Sure. Now, I will ask you 3 questions, Sara. If your answers match Brian's answers, then the both of you will be off to the Gold Coast for 5 days on us. Sara: (laughing) "Yes." DJ: "Alright. When did you last have sex, Sara?" Sara: "Oh God, Brian....uh, this morning before Brian went to work." DJ: "What time?" Sara: "Around 8 this morning." DJ: "Very good. Next question. How long did it last?" Sara: "12, 15 minutes maybe." DJ: "Hmmmm. That's close enough. I am sure she is trying to protect his manhood. We've got one last question, Sara. You are one question away from a trip to the Gold Coast. Are you ready?" Sara: (laughing) "Yes." DJ: "Where did you have it?" Sarah: "OH MY GOD, BRIAN!! You didn't tell them that did you?" Brian: "Just tell him, honey." DJ: "What is bothering you so much, Sara?" Sara: "Well..." DJ: Come on Sara.....where did you have it? PTO Sarah: "Up the arse....." After a long pause, the DJ said, "Folks, we need to take a station break" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Caramel 0 Posted August 19, 2005 Share Posted August 19, 2005 Where are all the cunty wankers?? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
luckyluke 2 Posted August 19, 2005 Share Posted August 19, 2005 Bloody hell, where have you been hiding? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Caramel 0 Posted August 19, 2005 Share Posted August 19, 2005 In your pocket! How are you? Are you a doc yet? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
luckyluke 2 Posted August 19, 2005 Share Posted August 19, 2005 Naw...2 years in, with another three to go (or four if I want to do another degree in the middle). It's getting exciting now...they've let us loose on real patients. Yes, they're alive before you say anything! For now anyway...muhahaha What are you up to these days? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Meenzer 15518 Posted August 19, 2005 Share Posted August 19, 2005 Where are all the cunty wankers?? 14819[/snapback] Good grief. You! You!!! Hey. Great avatar btw. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
luckyluke 2 Posted August 19, 2005 Share Posted August 19, 2005 Burning the midnight oil again Meenzer? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Meenzer 15518 Posted August 19, 2005 Share Posted August 19, 2005 Burning the midnight oil again Meenzer? 14824[/snapback] 'Fraid so... just done with work for the night. Trying to pay a few bills before hitting the Toon next week, while simultaneously making plans for the social side of said Toon-hitting. My head hurts. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Meenzer 15518 Posted August 19, 2005 Share Posted August 19, 2005 How's you, by the way? I'm so rude. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
luckyluke 2 Posted August 19, 2005 Share Posted August 19, 2005 Absolutley knacked, I'm off to bed! I've got quite a busy week ahead of me... One of my best mates is back for a few days (he's working in Shropshire), there's a few parties to go to this weekend then I'm off to Leeds for a bit on Monday or Tuesday. Still, makes a change from arsing around on here all day. Night. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
themags 0 Posted August 20, 2005 Share Posted August 20, 2005 so i could of got with my mates sister, i didnt! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Matty 0 Posted August 21, 2005 Share Posted August 21, 2005 so i could of got with my mates sister, i didnt! 15557[/snapback] Well done! You big puff Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Brock Manson 0 Posted August 21, 2005 Share Posted August 21, 2005 Well I'll be going to a BBQ later on and there'll be loads of people there, and the local hockey team I'll be getting pissed (byob unfortunately, I'll have to 'borrow' some after mine's run out) and going round saying "you...are...the best....sign my beer?" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
themags 0 Posted August 21, 2005 Share Posted August 21, 2005 so i could of got with my mates sister, i didnt! 15557[/snapback] Well done! You big puff 15574[/snapback] fucking hell, i cant even remember posting that pleased i didnt like Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lou 0 Posted August 21, 2005 Share Posted August 21, 2005 I go to Edinburgh Festival on Tuesday Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Meenzer 15518 Posted August 21, 2005 Share Posted August 21, 2005 I go to Edinburgh Festival on Tuesday 15634[/snapback] I'm in Edinburgh on Wednesday and Thursday, visiting friends. Should I expect to see you on the Royal Mile, wearing a clown costume and blue body paint and precariously balanced on one leg atop a packing crate, all in the name of "performance art"? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Isegrim 9761 Posted August 21, 2005 Share Posted August 21, 2005 Hmm, a totally random throw in. I handed in my dissertation yesterday. Yay. Now I am bored... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jill 0 Posted August 21, 2005 Share Posted August 21, 2005 I'm super-bored. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Isegrim 9761 Posted August 21, 2005 Share Posted August 21, 2005 I'm super-bored. 15669[/snapback] Pah, I'm über-bored. I'll already cleaned up my office and am now just waiting for the rain to stop so that I can go home and open a bottle of wine so that I can get über-drunk as well... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jill 0 Posted August 21, 2005 Share Posted August 21, 2005 I'm super-bored. 15669[/snapback] Pah, I'm über-bored. I'll already cleaned up my office and am now just waiting for the rain to stop so that I can go home and open a bottle of wine so that I can get über-drunk as well... 15673[/snapback] *Tries to think of something clever to say in German.. can't* "Ich schlafe in der Dusche Weil die Dusche zu mir hält Sie ist der einzige Freund Den ich noch habe auf der Welt" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Meenzer 15518 Posted August 21, 2005 Share Posted August 21, 2005 Sie sollen brennen! In der Hölle! Stirb, Fernseher, stirb! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Isegrim 9761 Posted August 21, 2005 Share Posted August 21, 2005 I'm super-bored. 15669[/snapback] Pah, I'm über-bored. I'll already cleaned up my office and am now just waiting for the rain to stop so that I can go home and open a bottle of wine so that I can get über-drunk as well... 15673[/snapback] *Tries to think of something clever to say in German.. can't* "Ich schlafe in der Dusche Weil die Dusche zu mir hält Sie ist der einzige Freund Den ich noch habe auf der Welt" 15678[/snapback] You'll get herewith nominated for the Lou award for astonishing randomness. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Isegrim 9761 Posted August 21, 2005 Share Posted August 21, 2005 Sie sollen brennen! In der Hölle! Stirb, Fernseher, stirb! 15682[/snapback] Did you watched too much Weltjugendtag? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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