wykikitoon 20724 Posted April 4, 2006 Share Posted April 4, 2006 Hi Guys Im after a little advice about an issue I have with my girlfriend. Right where shall I start? I started seeing a lass from work 6 months ago. Everything has gone great and things are awesome apart from one thing. Another bloke. Anyway this needs a little explanation so here goes. My girlfriend is an awesome person, she gets on with the majority of people and is a good laugh, she enjoys going out to the boozer, plays hockey and enjoys the social life there and likes everything that I do, snowboarding, mountainbiking, walking and generally having a laugh. Anyway when I first starting seeing her she told me about this "stalker" guy she had. Basically a lad in her local. Anyway in the first month of seeing her, she took me round her locals and introduced me to her friends. Jokingly one of her friend mentioned this "stalker" and laughed. I wasnt too botherd then and laughed it off. The day after I asked about this guy and she said its someone she know through her dad. Its basically her dads friends son and her goes in her local. Anyway this lad asked my girfriend out a couple of times a few years back and my girlfriend went out with him but decided just friends. Apparently he didnt take good to this and was gutted. Anyway for a couple of years when my girlfriend had been in the boozer with another bloke this kid would kick off if he had a skin full and make rumors up etc, saying she was seeing him. Anyway this lad has supposedly calmed down and doesnt do that anymore. After about 3 months off seeing my girlfriend I bumped into this lad in her local and we chatted, I thought to myself whats all the fuss, he is a nice lad etc etc and nothing wrong at all. He started telling me how his family business was failing and that my girlefriend had been a great help to him. I asked in what way and he said he had been texting and phoning her when he felt down. I wasnt botherd too much about this as I know they are friends and thats what friends are for. Anyway one Sunday I was going mountainbiking and my girlfriend wasnt coming along. So I asked her what she would be doing, she replayed "Fixing the loft with XXX" (XXX Being this lad) I thought nothing of it and went. Then I thought why couldnt my girlfriend ask me to do it. Anyway this lad in the end didnt help my girlfriend and I did feel better about it. One day I was asked to get my gfriends mobile from her bedroom and bring it to her, I like a large horses willy looked at her text messages and noticed loads from this kid, basically asking her if she wants a beer to talk about snowboarding etc, something pretty inncocent nothing like "Fancy a shag?" But this hurt me in a way. A couple of weeks ago he went round to my gfriend to ask for a map and a compass to lend (He is a walking leader, something pretty vital not to have IMO). Anyway we needed them this weekend to go biking. Tonight, I have come to my gfriends bedroom and got her mobile (I know penis) and seen a text from this lad "Why did you need that stuff? Did you go walking? Fancy chucking yourself round a biscuit?" Now heres where I need some advice. I have already told my gfriend I am slighlty jelous of this lad, she told me there isnt anything to worry about. I trust her to say no if he comes onto her but then again why am I looking at her texts? Nothing ive seen have suggested that! But its this smell (Him) thats lingering! What the hell does "Fancy chucking yourself round a biscuit" Mean Im sorry for the long post. I love my girlfriend so much I would be devestated to mess anything up for being a prat Thanks for the advice in advance TOON TOON Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jusoda Kid 1 Posted April 4, 2006 Share Posted April 4, 2006 Tell him to stop stalking her or you'll chop his fucking hands off and then he won't even be able to wank over her. Wouldn't be putting up with no bloke texting wor lass giving it the just friends shit, friend of her dads or not, he'd have to be giving a few pointers, something along the lines of "fuck right off, sex case". Hope this helps Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
adios 717 Posted April 4, 2006 Share Posted April 4, 2006 XXX Being this lad 115128[/snapback] Vin Diesel looks quite hard, tread carefully. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jimbo 175 Posted April 4, 2006 Share Posted April 4, 2006 Its a problem in life that females can't grasp the fact that the only reason men are friendly to them is because they want sex. She thinks: "ahhh he's a nice, sweet, friendly lad" He thinks: "I want to fuck her" your problem is if you tell her to stop being his friend, she will think you are a jelous, power-freak If you give him a good leathering, she'll think you are a Neanderthal, jelous power-freak. What you need to ensure is that you fuck her brains out at every oportunity, because the universal fact of life with women is this: "If you don't fuck them, someone else will !" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
peasepud 59 Posted April 4, 2006 Share Posted April 4, 2006 Im sorry to let you know this but..... "Chucking yourself round a biscuit" is street slang for have an 11 man gangbang with large black fellas, 'taken from Bourbon biscuits which are chocolate sandwiches, the term originated in Queens when gay men would meet for 'alternative' coffee mornings. The term "Fixing the loft" is also an alternative slang phrase for carrying out the Monroe Transfer after a seriously large hot curry. So you reckon you'll stay together then? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dr Kenneth Noisewater 0 Posted April 4, 2006 Share Posted April 4, 2006 Jimbo speaks the truth. Purely platonic friendships between males & females are extremely rare. Either one side or the other has, at the back of their mind, bedroom action on the agenda. FACT-ALAMA-DING-DONG. Don't use physical violence, but let this guy know that you're onto him, watch him like a hawk. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Holden McGroin 6783 Posted April 4, 2006 Share Posted April 4, 2006 Jimbo speaks the truth. Purely platonic friendships between males & females are extremely rare. Either one side or the other has, at the back of their mind, bedroom action on the agenda. FACT-ALAMA-DING-DONG. Don't use physical violence, but let this guy know that you're onto him, watch him like a hawk. 115137[/snapback] Fucking brilliant. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
themags 0 Posted April 4, 2006 Share Posted April 4, 2006 we need a female point on what Jimbo mentioned, cos i reckon girls do know when a guy is just been friends with them cos he fancies them and the girl just chooses to ignore it i reckon it is possibly to be just friends with the opposite sex, however this guy is rather obviously trying to get in to her pants Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
catmag 337 Posted April 4, 2006 Share Posted April 4, 2006 Jimbo speaks the truth. Purely platonic friendships between males & females are extremely rare. Either one side or the other has, at the back of their mind, bedroom action on the agenda. FACT-ALAMA-DING-DONG. 115137[/snapback] Rare, but not unheard of. The majority of my best friends throughout my life have been male, and with only one exception they have been entirely platonic. I can only speak from my side of things but they would never have turned into anything more. However in this particular case, it's pretty obvious that the bloke still holds a bit of a torch for your girlfriend and it sounds like he'll use any excuse to just see, text, or be around her which is naturally worrying for you. The fact that your girlfriend is happy for you to go and get her phone, she's not deleting messages, and she's open and honest about when he's around etc seems to suggest that she doesn't reciprocate his feelings and therefore it looks like your worries are unfounded. It may be worth a quiet word in his ear like. I wouldn't advocate kicking the shit out of him just yet though. Unrequited love can be a painful enough thing! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
catmag 337 Posted April 4, 2006 Share Posted April 4, 2006 we need a female point on what Jimbo mentioned, cos i reckon girls do know when a guy is just been friends with them cos he fancies them and the girl just chooses to ignore it 115142[/snapback] Aye we do. We're not daft you know! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Toplass-101 Posted April 4, 2006 Share Posted April 4, 2006 Im sorry to let you know this but..... "Chucking yourself round a biscuit" is street slang for have an 11 man gangbang with large black fellas, 'taken from Bourbon biscuits which are chocolate sandwiches, the term originated in Queens when gay men would meet for 'alternative' coffee mornings. The term "Fixing the loft" is also an alternative slang phrase for carrying out the Monroe Transfer after a seriously large hot curry. So you reckon you'll stay together then? 115136[/snapback] Dont listen to that fool I read his txts the other week, and believe me, your lasses txts are very very verytame in comparison to what was on his mobile. If you feel strongly enough, and its playing on ya mind, then tell her you have read it and ask her what it means. Give her the chance to explain 1st, you will know if her explanation is plausible or not. If it sounds like a load of rubbish then ask her what is really going on. But give her the benefit of the doubt 1st, and then tell her how you feel about this guy, least then you two can sort it together. If she loves you she will want to sort it out as she wont want you to be feeling bad. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
peasepud 59 Posted April 4, 2006 Share Posted April 4, 2006 Im sorry to let you know this but..... "Chucking yourself round a biscuit" is street slang for have an 11 man gangbang with large black fellas, 'taken from Bourbon biscuits which are chocolate sandwiches, the term originated in Queens when gay men would meet for 'alternative' coffee mornings. The term "Fixing the loft" is also an alternative slang phrase for carrying out the Monroe Transfer after a seriously large hot curry. So you reckon you'll stay together then? 115136[/snapback] Dont listen to that fool I read his txts the other week, and believe me, your lasses txts are very very verytame in comparison to what was on his mobile. If you feel strongly enough, and its playing on ya mind, then tell her you have read it and ask her what it means. Give her the chance to explain 1st, you will know if her explanation is plausible or not. If it sounds like a load of rubbish then ask her what is really going on. But give her the benefit of the doubt 1st, and then tell her how you feel about this guy, least then you two can sort it together. If she loves you she will want to sort it out as she wont want you to be feeling bad. 115146[/snapback] Ignore her, she knaaas nowt, in fact shes just narked cos I wouldnt go round and help her fix her loft. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Toplass-101 Posted April 4, 2006 Share Posted April 4, 2006 Im sorry to let you know this but..... "Chucking yourself round a biscuit" is street slang for have an 11 man gangbang with large black fellas, 'taken from Bourbon biscuits which are chocolate sandwiches, the term originated in Queens when gay men would meet for 'alternative' coffee mornings. The term "Fixing the loft" is also an alternative slang phrase for carrying out the Monroe Transfer after a seriously large hot curry. So you reckon you'll stay together then? 115136[/snapback] Dont listen to that fool I read his txts the other week, and believe me, your lasses txts are very very verytame in comparison to what was on his mobile. If you feel strongly enough, and its playing on ya mind, then tell her you have read it and ask her what it means. Give her the chance to explain 1st, you will know if her explanation is plausible or not. If it sounds like a load of rubbish then ask her what is really going on. But give her the benefit of the doubt 1st, and then tell her how you feel about this guy, least then you two can sort it together. If she loves you she will want to sort it out as she wont want you to be feeling bad. 115146[/snapback] Ignore her, she knaaas nowt, in fact shes just narked cos I wouldnt go round and help her fix her loft. 115148[/snapback] I live in a ground floor flat ya knacker Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dr Kenneth Noisewater 0 Posted April 4, 2006 Share Posted April 4, 2006 If you feel strongly enough, and its playing on ya mind, then tell her you have read it and ask her what it means. Give her the chance to explain 1st, you will know if her explanation is plausible or not. If it sounds like a load of rubbish then ask her what is really going on. 115146[/snapback] Tell her you've been looking at her messages? Noooooo! Don't do that. She can play the victim then, and you're the nasty jealous man. And who's she going to go running to then, eh? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
wykikitoon 20724 Posted April 4, 2006 Author Share Posted April 4, 2006 Cheers Jimbo, made me laugh Thanks catmag too. Youve said exactly what I thought and its nice to hear (well read) it from someone else. I aint botherd about her having lads as friends (She works in a drawing office and is the only women in an office of 150+ Blokes), its this one thats worried me a tad. I wont touch him either, she has made it clear to him that she loves me, she told him the other week we are moving in together. Its the fact he cant get the hint. I may just get someone to have a word Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Renton 21994 Posted April 4, 2006 Share Posted April 4, 2006 Im sorry to let you know this but..... "Chucking yourself round a biscuit" is street slang for have an 11 man gangbang with large black fellas, 'taken from Bourbon biscuits which are chocolate sandwiches, the term originated in Queens when gay men would meet for 'alternative' coffee mornings. The term "Fixing the loft" is also an alternative slang phrase for carrying out the Monroe Transfer after a seriously large hot curry. So you reckon you'll stay together then? 115136[/snapback] Dont listen to that fool I read his txts the other week, and believe me, your lasses txts are very very verytame in comparison to what was on his mobile. If you feel strongly enough, and its playing on ya mind, then tell her you have read it and ask her what it means. Give her the chance to explain 1st, you will know if her explanation is plausible or not. If it sounds like a load of rubbish then ask her what is really going on. But give her the benefit of the doubt 1st, and then tell her how you feel about this guy, least then you two can sort it together. If she loves you she will want to sort it out as she wont want you to be feeling bad. 115146[/snapback] Ignore her, she knaaas nowt, in fact shes just narked cos I wouldnt go round and help her fix her loft. 115148[/snapback] I live in a ground floor flat ya knacker 115151[/snapback] I think he knows that. Did you read the Munroe transfer thread? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Matt 0 Posted April 4, 2006 Share Posted April 4, 2006 Might just be me, but I'm friends with quite a few lasses I knew from uni and have known for ages. Doesn't mean I suddenly want to knob them. Jeez, I guess that makes me a gay. Anyway, this guy does seem a bit crazy. He's probably living in a bit of a fantasy world- especially if his family is going through a bad time with the business- he'll be looking to cling on to any source of joy. It might have always been the 'big plan' that he would get involved in the business and he's substituting it with the other 'big plan' that him and your missus could be together someday. It doesn't sound like the sort of situation where his intentions are entirely pure. Equally, that doesn't make this guy evil. If he's having a tough time, acting the hard guy or having a real go at him will only be seen as kicking a vulnerable individual, which probably won't go down will with the missus. Obvious answer but you're going to have to talk about it with her. Admit you're concerned about this guy's intentions, say you understand that his head might be a bit messed up right now but you're not entirely comfortable with the way things are. You're allowed to be. The fact you are worried is not about tribal pride, but the fact that you value your relationship and wouldn't want something or someone to damage it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
snakehips 0 Posted April 4, 2006 Share Posted April 4, 2006 Tell her that the scumbags on your favourite forum were talking about the biscuit thing but you didn't know what the hell they were on about. Ask her if she knows what it means. Can't believe you read her texts though! Without knowing the lad or lass, it's impossible to say whether he would make a move sometime (though it sounds likely) and whether she would succumb - especially if he played the wounded soldier, hard luck, nobody loves me shite on her. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jimbo 175 Posted April 4, 2006 Share Posted April 4, 2006 Might just be me, but I'm friends with quite a few lasses I knew from uni and have known for ages. Doesn't mean I suddenly want to knob them. Jeez, I guess that makes me a gay. 115158[/snapback] tbh Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Matt 0 Posted April 4, 2006 Share Posted April 4, 2006 (edited) I'd best dig up that Steve and Meenz shagfest thread and see if there's any sloppy seconds. Edited April 4, 2006 by Matt Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tooj 17 Posted April 4, 2006 Share Posted April 4, 2006 Txt him off her phone saying you want the loft fixed, then when he comes round make sure an accident befauls him but make sure it looks like an ACCIDENT Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dr Kenneth Noisewater 0 Posted April 4, 2006 Share Posted April 4, 2006 Tell her you went to the toilet after him and he'd pissed all over the seat and floor. She'll look at him like dog shit after that Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jusoda Kid 1 Posted April 4, 2006 Share Posted April 4, 2006 Pan his head in and when your girlfriend asks why you done it tell her he tried to touch you on your front in the mens toilets. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tooj 17 Posted April 4, 2006 Share Posted April 4, 2006 Tell her you went to the toilet after him and he'd pissed all over the seat and floor. She'll look at him like dog shit after that 115169[/snapback] Just get him to do that round Gemmill's house and he'd feel the wrath Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Matt 0 Posted April 4, 2006 Share Posted April 4, 2006 Tell her you went to the toilet after him and he'd pissed all over the seat and floor. She'll look at him like dog shit after that 115169[/snapback] Just get him to do that round Gemmill's house and he'd feel the wrath 115181[/snapback] That wouldn't work. Gem ain't got a bog, just two baths. That's why he never ever misses. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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