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The Bad Taste Joke Thread....


Craig
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What's the difference between a Muslim and a dead horse?

It's no fun beating a dead horse.

 

How do you get a Muslim woman pregnant?

Dress her up as a goat.

 

What do Muslim men do during foreplay?

Tickle the goat under the chin.

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Bloodninja: Wanna cyber?

DirtyKate: K, but don't tell anybody ;-)

DirtyKate: Who are you?

Bloodninja: I've got blond hair, blue eyes, I work out a lot

Bloodninja: And I have a part time job delivering for Papa John's in my Geo Storm.

DirtyKate: You sound sexy.. I bet you want me in the back of your car..

Bloodninja: Maybe some other time. You should call up Papa John's and make an order

DirtyKate: Haha! OK

DirtyKate: Hello! I'd like an extra-EXTRA large pizza just dripping with sauce.

Bloodninja: Well, first they would say, "Hello, this is Papa John's, how may I help you", then they tell you the specials, and then you would make your order. So that's an X-Large. What toppings do you want?

DirtyKate: I want everything, baby!

Bloodninja: Is this a delivery?

DirtyKate: Umm...Yes

DirtyKate: So you're bringing the pizza to my house now? Cause I'm home alone... and I think I'll take a shower...

Bloodninja: Good. It will take about fifteen minutes to cook, and then I'll drive to your house.

**pause**

DirtyKate:I'm almost finished with my shower... Hurry up!

Bloodninja: You can't hurry good pizza.

Bloodninja: I'm on my way now though

**pause**

DirtyKate: So you're at my front door now.

Bloodninja: How did you know?

Bloodninja: I knock but you can't hear me cause you're in the shower. So I let myself in, and walk inside. I put the pizza down on your coffee table.

Bloodninja: Are you ready to get nasty, baby? I'm as hot as a pizza oven

DirtyKate: ooohh yeah. I step out of the shower and I'm all wet and cold. Warm me up baby

Bloodninja: So you're still in the bathroom?

DirtyKate: Yeah, I'm wrapping a towel around myself.

Bloodninja: I can no longer resist the pizza. I open the box and unzip my pants with my other hand. As I penetrate the gooey cheese, I moan in ecstacy. The mushrooms and Italian sausage are rough, but the sauce is deliciously soothing. I blow my load in seconds. As you leave the bathroom, I exit through the front door....

DirtyKate: What the fuck?

DirtyKate: You perverted piece of s**t

DirtyKate: F**k

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Q. What do you call Jade Goody in a wedding dress?

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

A. A shuttlecock.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

To help the bushfire victims, a number of Australian singers have joined forces for a charity record - 'Fry Me Kangaroo Brown, Sport' goes out on sale this Monday

Edited by @yourservice
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So Patrick Swayze hasn't got long left to live.

 

That's okay though, he's already had the time of his life.

 

 

 

Scousers must lead incredibly healthy lifestyles.

 

Everywhere you go in Liverpool, people are wearing tracksuits.

 

 

 

 

black ice = bad

black magic = bad

black death = bad

black holes = bad

black witch =bad

black market = bad

black monday = bad

black tuesday = bad

black wednesday =bad

black thursday = bad

black friday = bad

black widow = bad

black list = bad

black mail = bad

black hat hacker = bad

black people = bad

 

Anyone spot a pattern ?

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So Patrick Swayze hasn't got long left to live.

 

That's okay though, he's already had the time of his life.

 

 

 

Scousers must lead incredibly healthy lifestyles.

 

Everywhere you go in Liverpool, people are wearing tracksuits.

 

 

 

 

black ice = bad

black magic = bad

black death = bad

black holes = bad

black witch =bad

black market = bad

black monday = bad

black tuesday = bad

black wednesday =bad

black thursday = bad

black friday = bad

black widow = bad

black list = bad

black mail = bad

black hat hacker = bad

black people = bad

 

Anyone spot a pattern ?

 

Careful, Luke doesn't like it when you post racist jokes. :D

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  • 2 weeks later...
  • 3 weeks later...
  • 1 month later...

Jade Goody has been portrayed by the media as a heroine for raising awareness about cervical cancer, in spite of the fact that she forgot to have a smear test.

 

Last year, I forgot to turn off an unlit oven before leaving for work. The ensuing explosion killed my wife and three children.

 

Was I portrayed by the media as a hero for raising awareness about gas safety?

 

Was I fuck.

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The World Health Organisation have warned that the incubation period of Mexican Swine is about a Weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeek.

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  • 3 weeks later...

After it was announced Katie Price and Peter Andre are to separate, Katie said she would miss the family holidays they shared, the tv specials they filmed, and the companionship.

 

Peter said he would miss the titwanks and watching the fat black kid walk into the wall.

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