Alan Shearer 9 0 Posted September 10, 2006 Share Posted September 10, 2006 a cunt? It's the only one I know Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JawD 99 Posted September 11, 2006 Share Posted September 11, 2006 Hey was at a Muslim birthday party last night ..... Fuck me pass the parcel was quick.. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Meenzer 15342 Posted September 11, 2006 Share Posted September 11, 2006 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tom_NUFC 0 Posted September 15, 2006 Share Posted September 15, 2006 (edited) This isn't exactly sick or a joke for that matter, it's a slightly racist true story, which is a favourite of my Dad's. Back in the early 70s, a number of Social Clubs used to get some pretty big/well known acts on. My Dad went to see the Four Tops play at High Pit Club in Cramlington. The compere comes on to introduce them, only to go "oh hell, I've forgotten their name...anyway, they're four darkies from America" Edited September 15, 2006 by Tom_NUFC Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BlueStar 0 Posted September 17, 2006 Share Posted September 17, 2006 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tom_NUFC 0 Posted September 17, 2006 Share Posted September 17, 2006 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mags 1 Posted September 18, 2006 Share Posted September 18, 2006 What's white and goes streaking across the sky? The coming of the Lord. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Toplass-101 Posted September 19, 2006 Share Posted September 19, 2006 What's white and goes streaking across the sky? The coming of the Lord. well I laughed Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BlueStar 0 Posted September 28, 2006 Share Posted September 28, 2006 (edited) A priest hooks a huge fish. Helping him reel it in, a sailor says "Whoa, look at the size of that fucker!" "Hey, mind your language!" says the priest. Embarrassed, the sailor thinks quickly and blurts out, "Sorry father, but that's what this fish is called - it's a Fucker fish!" Accepting the explanation, the priest forgives the sailor and takes the fish back to church. "Look at this huge fucker" says the priest, spotting the bishop. "Language please! This is Gods house," replies the bishop. "No, no - that's what this fish is called," says the priest. "Oh," says the bishop, scratching his chin "I could clean that fucker and we could have it for dinner". So the bishop takes the fish, cleans it, and brings it to the mother superior. "Could you cook this fucker for dinner tonight?" he asks her. "My, what language!" she exclaims, clearly shocked. "No, sister that's what the fish is called - a fucker," says the bishop. Satisfied with the explanation, the mother superior says, "wonderful, I'll cook that fucker tonight, The Pope is coming for dinner!" The fish tastes just great and The Pope asks where they got it. "Well, I caught the fucker!" says the priest. "And I cleaned the fucker!" says the bishop. "And I cooked the fucker!" says the mother superior. The Pope stares at them for a minute with a steely glaze, leans back on his chair, takes off his cap, puts his feet up on the table, pours himself a whiskey and says " You know what?, You cunts are alright." Edited September 28, 2006 by BlueStar Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
adios 717 Posted September 28, 2006 Share Posted September 28, 2006 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gemmill 44090 Posted September 28, 2006 Share Posted September 28, 2006 That is class. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sweetleftpeg 0 Posted September 28, 2006 Share Posted September 28, 2006 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
catmag 336 Posted September 28, 2006 Share Posted September 28, 2006 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bobbyshinton 59 Posted September 28, 2006 Share Posted September 28, 2006 A priest hooks a huge fish. Helping him reel it in, a sailor says "Whoa, look at the size of that fucker!" "Hey, mind your language!" says the priest. Embarrassed, the sailor thinks quickly and blurts out, "Sorry father, but that's what this fish is called - it's a Fucker fish!" Accepting the explanation, the priest forgives the sailor and takes the fish back to church. "Look at this huge fucker" says the priest, spotting the bishop. "Language please! This is Gods house," replies the bishop. "No, no - that's what this fish is called," says the priest. "Oh," says the bishop, scratching his chin "I could clean that fucker and we could have it for dinner". So the bishop takes the fish, cleans it, and brings it to the mother superior. "Could you cook this fucker for dinner tonight?" he asks her. "My, what language!" she exclaims, clearly shocked. "No, sister that's what the fish is called - a fucker," says the bishop. Satisfied with the explanation, the mother superior says, "wonderful, I'll cook that fucker tonight, The Pope is coming for dinner!" The fish tastes just great and The Pope asks where they got it. "Well, I caught the fucker!" says the priest. "And I cleaned the fucker!" says the bishop. "And I cooked the fucker!" says the mother superior. The Pope stares at them for a minute with a steely glaze, leans back on his chair, takes off his cap, puts his feet up on the table, pours himself a whiskey and says " You know what?, You cunts are alright." hey howay man stop using my material and Gemmill et al you all slagged me off when I posted that on N-O Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gemmill 44090 Posted September 28, 2006 Share Posted September 28, 2006 bobby, that's the first time I've seen that joke. Normally you post unfunny ones, why the change in policy? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bobbyshinton 59 Posted September 28, 2006 Share Posted September 28, 2006 bobby, that's the first time I've seen that joke. Normally you post unfunny ones, why the change in policy? I refer you to my post of Tuesday June 20th on N-O fucking too true Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ted Maul 0 Posted September 28, 2006 Share Posted September 28, 2006 Bugger off, Catholic girl Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
catmag 336 Posted September 28, 2006 Share Posted September 28, 2006 Bugger off, Catholic girl Besmirching the name of Catholics AND using the c-word all in one post. Too much. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Patrokles Posted September 28, 2006 Share Posted September 28, 2006 bobby, that's the first time I've seen that joke. Normally you post unfunny ones, why the change in policy? I refer you to my post of Tuesday June 20th on N-O fucking too true Yeah, I, too, recalled bobby posting that joke. Well, in all fairness, I knew I'd seen it before but I didn't think it could possibly have been bobby. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
adios 717 Posted September 28, 2006 Share Posted September 28, 2006 I bet the pope loves a good cunting. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
catmag 336 Posted September 28, 2006 Share Posted September 28, 2006 I bet the pope loves a good cunting. Oh my! *makes the sign of the cross* Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BlueStar 0 Posted September 28, 2006 Share Posted September 28, 2006 (edited) I bet the pope loves a good cunting. But alter boys don't have... zzzZZZZAAARRGHHH! Edited September 28, 2006 by BlueStar Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jusoda Kid 1 Posted November 13, 2006 Share Posted November 13, 2006 4 people on atrain. An old lady, a fit blonde, a black man, and a white bloke. they go into a dark tunnel and hear a slap, when they exit the tunnel the black man is rubbing his face. The old lady thinks "i bet he tried touching the blonde girl and got a slap. The Blonde thinks "I bet he tried touching me and touched the old lady by mistake and got a slap. The white man thinks "I can't wait for another tunnel so i can slap that black cunt again". p.s sorry cath Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Brock Manson 0 Posted November 13, 2006 Share Posted November 13, 2006 Did you hear what happened to the deaf man? Well he fucking well didn't. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
catmag 336 Posted November 14, 2006 Share Posted November 14, 2006 What's black and screams? Stevie Wonder answering the iron. I LOVE that joke!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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