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The Giant Black And Yellow, Banana Looking, Bratwurst Sucking Mo Fos v Eddies Pumped Up, Patched Up, Paper Thin Geordie A Squad

Holden McGroin

By Holden McGroin,
in Newcastle Forum

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Holden McGroin
Holden McGroin

Despite taking on the hardest fixture list known to man I'm still standing proudly.  However, this lots team colours actually look like a slightly gone-off banana skin. If ever there was a sign……

Holden McGroin
Holden McGroin

Vincent, you’re new to Toontastic. I get it.  You don’t understand the natural pecking order and respect you should give the number 1 poster on this board. I’m going to let this slide. Just this once

Gemmill
Gemmill

The perfect Toontastic episode of Casualty would start with you at the breakfast table eating your dry shredded wheat. Radio 5 on.    In comes hot dog legs.    "Is tha goin out on

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Monkeys Fist

Monkeys Fist 43059

Posted
Posted
1 hour ago, Gemmill said:

A lot of people revealing themselves as rapists on the previous page. Just another Thursday on Toontastic.

 

1 hour ago, wykikitoon said:

I think people have overlooked Gemmills love of taxi queues tbh


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Gemmill

Gemmill 46001

Posted
Posted
1 hour ago, wykikitoon said:

I think people have overlooked Gemmills love of casualty tbh

 

The perfect Toontastic episode of Casualty would start with you at the breakfast table eating your dry shredded wheat. Radio 5 on. 

 

In comes hot dog legs. 

 

"Is tha goin out on t'bike today?" 

 

"Am I goin out on t'bike!? Of COURSE am bloodeh goin out on t'bike! Has thee got nothin better to do than ask stupid questions. Am alreadeh up a height about bloodeh Jeremeh vahhhn on t'radio!" 

 

Cut to a downed bike, wheel spinning, a blood soaked bidon rolls past. 

 

"Chuffin Nora. Someone's put mah feet on back to front. Call th'ambulance!" 

 

Rest of the episode is just you having the fucking life of all the doctors and nurses. Even Jimmy can't break down your defences. 

 

The episode ends with Ash putting a pillow over your face. 

 

 

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wykikitoon

wykikitoon 20708

Posted
Posted
19 minutes ago, Gemmill said:

 

The perfect Toontastic episode of Casualty would start with you at the breakfast table eating your dry shredded wheat. Radio 5 on. 

 

In comes hot dog legs. 

 

"Is tha goin out on t'bike today?" 

 

"Am I goin out on t'bike!? Of COURSE am bloodeh goin out on t'bike! Has thee got nothin better to do than ask stupid questions. Am alreadeh up a height about bloodeh Jeremeh vahhhn on t'radio!" 

 

Cut to a downed bike, wheel spinning, a blood soaked bidon rolls past. 

 

"Chuffin Nora. Someone's put mah feet on back to front. Call th'ambulance!" 

 

Rest of the episode is just you having the fucking life of all the doctors and nurses. Even Jimmy can't break down your defences. 

 

The episode ends with Ash putting a pillow over your face. 

 

 

Bidon.

 

What a bell end. 

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Toonpack

Toonpack 9911

Posted
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It’s a dark, dark day, I agree with Gemmill on the CL finish bottom thing.

 

I am, however, NOT an accountant so G and Dazzler can continue their ying/yang debit/credit frolicking undisturbed. 

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Renton

Renton 21978

Posted
Posted
53 minutes ago, Gemmill said:

 

The perfect Toontastic episode of Casualty would start with you at the breakfast table eating your dry shredded wheat. Radio 5 on. 

 

In comes hot dog legs. 

 

"Is tha goin out on t'bike today?" 

 

"Am I goin out on t'bike!? Of COURSE am bloodeh goin out on t'bike! Has thee got nothin better to do than ask stupid questions. Am alreadeh up a height about bloodeh Jeremeh vahhhn on t'radio!" 

 

Cut to a downed bike, wheel spinning, a blood soaked bidon rolls past. 

 

"Chuffin Nora. Someone's put mah feet on back to front. Call th'ambulance!" 

 

Rest of the episode is just you having the fucking life of all the doctors and nurses. Even Jimmy can't break down your defences. 

 

The episode ends with Ash putting a pillow over your face. 

 

 

 

Missed the cutscene where wykiki calls hot dog legs (wtf?) from hospital and she's with Callum Wilson. Zoom to pair of scissors with remnant of bike tyre rubber on the bedside table. 

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Dazzler

Dazzler 10365

Posted
Posted
28 minutes ago, Toonpack said:

It’s a dark, dark day, I agree with Gemmill on the CL finish bottom thing.

 

I am, however, NOT an accountant so G and Dazzler can continue their ying/yang debit/credit frolicking undisturbed. 

For the record, I don't agree with Gemmill. I want us to finish second in the group and go through as financially it benefits us, and the extra day rest also helps. Failing that I want third and us to batter a bunch of Cypriot sparkies in the EL before smashing Villareal (it's always fucking Sevilla or Villareal) in the final. 

 

That said, I don't appreciate the downright accountancy racism I've witnessed on here today.

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The Fish

The Fish 10963

Posted
Posted (edited)

Look, we're not going to win the Champions League this season. I wouldn't even be too optimistic about our chances in the Europa. I do think we can win the League Cup, or the FA Cup, and I do think we can qualify for the Champions League in 2024/25 where I'd hope that;

  • we have more quality in the first team
  • we have more strength in depth
  • our players would be more experienced in that competition
  • we wouldn't get such a brutal group

We weren't expecting to get Champions League football so soon, and our squad reflects that. Our first team is strong enough to compete for  European spots, to progress in the domestic cups and that's about it. We're not yet in a position to get very far in the Champions League.

 

My expectations for the CL before the draw was made was maybe get out of the group, then when the draw happened I just wanted not to be humiliated. If we now finish 4th, I'm fine with that. We haven't looked terrible, we haven't lost heavily, everything has been pretty fine margins but the experience and quality of the opponents told. Experience and quality that they've accrued over years and years in the Champions League. It's been amazing seeing some famous clubs come up against our lads, I've enjoyed each match. So much so I want to do it all again. We've a better chance of doing that if we're not stretching an already stretched squad to breaking point. I don't want to finish 4th, but I wouldn't be upset if we did.

 

Were we to qualify for next season I'd raise my expectations to getting out of the group and like some of you suggest, if we do that, who knows how far we could go? I'd fancy us against pretty much anyone at St James'. 

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Dr Gloom

Dr Gloom 22141

Posted
Posted

we've still got more than a puncher's chance of progressing. we can beat milan at home if the group is still alive with the crowd behind us. PSG is the big one but they weren't up to much at SJP, so why not? we might have isak and botman back by then - maybe barnes too if the latest is to be believed

 

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thebrokendoll

thebrokendoll 9450

Posted
Posted
25 minutes ago, Dr Gloom said:

we've still got more than a puncher's chance of progressing. we can beat milan at home if the group is still alive with the crowd behind us. PSG is the big one but they weren't up to much at SJP, so why not? we might have isak and botman back by then - maybe barnes too if the latest is to be believed

 

 

that's the spirit. just don't go to either of them.

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