Ed Harrisons Newcastle United Blog

[The Fish 10856]

I can't help you with a bike shed, but I swear someone's got the coordinates of a bacon shed...

[Holden McGroin 6583]

3 minutes ago, Adamn92 said:

Maybe the 2 groups should just meet up and settle things with an old fashioned punch up.

 

Right, where's the largest bike shed in toon we can all meet behind? 

I used to snog behind the bike sheds. You Yanks are so weird.

 

[Adamn92 42]

Just now, Holden McGroin said:

I used to snog behind the bike sheds. You Yanks are so weird.

 

I was never embarrassed enough by the girl I pulled to have to hide her behind a bike shed 🙂

[The Fish 10856]

Just now, Adamn92 said:

I was never embarrassed enough by the girl I pulled to have to hide her behind a bike shed 🙂

Look, some days you want a steak, other days you just fancy a kebab.

[Holden McGroin 6583]

2 minutes ago, Adamn92 said:

I was never embarrassed enough by the girl I pulled to have to hide her behind a bike shed 🙂

 

To be fair ; I have pulled some rotters in my time. I still get shudders about the Irish bird with hairy legs from Magaluf in 99.

Edited October 3, 2023 by Holden McGroin

[The Fish 10856]

1 minute ago, Holden McGroin said:

 

To be fair ; I have pulled some rotters in my time. I still get shudders about the Irish bird with hairy legs from Magaluf in 99.

Jeez that's harsh, Ewerk is right there man! tbstbs

[trophyshy 7083]

This was honestly one of the warmest welcomes I’ve ever seen on here.

 

Edited October 3, 2023 by trophyshy

[Holden McGroin 6583]

Just now, The Fish said:

Jeez that's harsh, Ewerk is right there man! tbstbs

We all know Ewerk shaves his legs.

[ewerk 30598]

Cheers, mother's crying. Nice one.

[Holden McGroin 6583]

2 minutes ago, trophyshy said:

This was honestly one of the warmest welcomes I’ve been seen on here.

 

I gave everyone of them a personalised welcome GIPHY. 
 

Basically the Toontastic red carpet.

Edited October 3, 2023 by Holden McGroin

[Holden McGroin 6583]

1 minute ago, ewerk said:

Cheers, mother's crying. Nice one.

 

Not sure you can get pregnant from anal. Pretty sure anyway.

[Howmanheyman 33173]

1 hour ago, Howay said:

 What the fuck was this about?
 

So a bloke come on announcing their world famous blog (I and I’m sure many hadn’t heard of, but that’s neither here nor there) closed down, which going off his latter posts meant we should have given them a national day of mourning or acted like their family had just died. Then after a few hours announced him and his best friend club had decided they wouldn’t grace us with their presence and that we’re all a bunch of cunts and soopafan’ed on the way out - again expecting the response would be apologetic and full of empathy . Get a fucking grip. Do their mammys make them a nice packed lunch, and ensure their scarf is on nice and snug before they go to the match? 

 

A definite whiff of Punxsutawney about these and gosh, darnet I don't mind saying it, excuse my cussing.

 

 

56 minutes ago, Meenzer said:

Boys boys boys

 

 

 

Ah, the mammaries indeed, teenage HMHM greatly appreciated the Italian songstress and her unfeasibly endowed funbags....

 

 

"How's the ham shank, did you say?"

[Dr Gloom 21915]

42 minutes ago, Dazzler said:

 

I stand by this. It's like walking into the Raby - There's a definite whiff of incest, stale tabs and oven chips about the place. Banjo shaggers to a man.

 

For the record I resent being called a yank, I'm from Elswick. The only gun I ever took into school shot chunks of tatey.

 

And to answer the shite question - sitting - there are only three allowable exceptions - 1) You have knees that physically don't bend, 2) You're under 5 years old, 3) You have a severe learning disability.

 

Any fully functional adult that stands to wipe their arse probably pulls their pants fully down to have a piss as well. There are registers for people like that.

 

you can stay  

[Dr Gloom 21915]

43 minutes ago, Dazzler said:

 

 

 

And to answer the shite question - sitting - there are only three allowable exceptions - 1) You have knees that physically don't bend, 2) You're under 5 years old, 3) You have a severe learning disability.

 

Any fully functional adult that stands to wipe their arse probably pulls their pants fully down to have a piss as well. There are registers for people like that.

 

@Monkeys Fist - there you have it. now what's your excuse? i'm guessing it's your knees at your age. filthy stander 

[thebrokendoll 9203]

ah sabrina, my right palm knew her so well.

 

but howay hmhm it simply has to be the swimming pool video.....

 

 

[MrBass 2651]

6 minutes ago, Dr Gloom said:

 

@Monkeys Fist - there you have it. now what's your excuse? i'm guessing it's your knees at your age. filthy stander 

 

I'd say it's more likely he doesn't have a tiny or inverted cock like the rest of you fannies. 

[Alex 35077]

1 minute ago, thebrokendoll said:

ah sabrina, my right palm knew her so well.

 

but howay hmhm it simply has to be the swimming pool video.....

 

 

What? She sang as well? 

[Alex 35077]

49 minutes ago, Adamn92 said:

Maybe the 2 groups should just meet up and settle things with an old fashioned punch up.

 

Right, where's the largest bike shed in toon we can all meet behind? 

[Toonpack 9399]

1 hour ago, Dazzler said:

 

I stand by this. It's like walking into the Raby - There's a definite whiff of incest, stale tabs and oven chips about the place. Banjo shaggers to a man.

 

For the record I resent being called a yank, I'm from Elswick. The only gun I ever took into school shot chunks of tatey.

 

And to answer the shite question - sitting - there are only three allowable exceptions - 1) You have knees that physically don't bend, 2) You're under 5 years old, 3) You have a severe learning disability.

 

Any fully functional adult that stands to wipe their arse probably pulls their pants fully down to have a piss as well. There are registers for people like that.

 

I would have stuck with being a yank tbh

 

 

[Toonpack 9399]

45 minutes ago, Holden McGroin said:

 

To be fair ; I have pulled some rotters in my time. I still get shudders about the Irish bird with hairy legs from Magaluf in 99.

 

Sean says the same about you

[Dazzler 9743]

53 minutes ago, The Fish said:

Odours do tend to follow the source around. Next time try having a shower before you migrate.

 

You're not my fucking supervisor.

[Monkeys Fist 42418]

25 minutes ago, Dr Gloom said:

 

@Monkeys Fist - there you have it. now what's your excuse? i'm guessing it's your knees at your age. filthy stander 

Just this once I’ll deign to reply to you savages who go shit spelunking. 
 

My heavily muscled physique, combined with my ridiculously generously endowed meat and potatoes, technically counts  as a disability, meaning I must raise my gluteus from the seat to ensure a clean swipe. 
 

Not fully standing, more like Alberto Tomba of the scatalogical hygiene world. 
 

 

Glad to see we’ve picked up a couple of waifs from last nights welcome party. 
 

My shed is always open. 

[Howmanheyman 33173]

24 minutes ago, thebrokendoll said:

ah sabrina, my right palm knew her so well.

 

but howay hmhm it simply has to be the swimming pool video.....

 

 

 

I agree but it wasn't me who posted the video, it was meenzer!

[Dazzler 9743]

Just now, Monkeys Fist said:

Just this once I’ll deign to reply to you savages who go shit spelunking. 
 

My heavily muscled physique, combined with my ridiculously generously endowed meat and potatoes, technically counts  as a disability, meaning I must raise my gluteus from the seat to ensure a clean swipe. 
 

Not fully standing, more like Alberto Tomba of the scatalogical hygiene world. 
 

 

Glad to see we’ve picked up a couple of waifs from last nights welcome party. 
 

My shed is always open. 

 

Be honest, it's because you're so rotund that your carer can't get between your cheek and the bog seat to wipe without losing their hand to a crushing injury, isn't it?

[Monkeys Fist 42418]

48 minutes ago, Holden McGroin said:

 

To be fair ; I have pulled some rotters in my time. I still get shudders about the Irish bird with hairy legs from Magaluf in 99.

Used to work with a lad who’s nickname was Ahab. 
 

2 pints and his beer goggles were set to extreme, he couldn’t keep away from land whales.