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2024/25 - Generic NUFC Chat. Cunts ☑️


wykikitoon
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8 minutes ago, wykikitoon said:

I was walking home from school that day. Walked past my mam who was going out with a friend.  I was with three of my mates, all Leeds fans.

 

Mam 'Keegans sold Cole'
Me 'Nah, he wouldn't do that'

me looking at my mam I almost cried.  Looked at my mates, they're pissing themselves laughing.

Me 'Fuck off' *runs* lol 

It was my first real bit of heartache as a toon fan. My mam had bought me the green and blue third kit from the Sheff Wed kit clash and it didn't fit me until the new season started, the only Christmas present I'd asked for was Cole 9 on the back and we sold the cunt a few weeks later and I couldn't wear it ever again!

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6 minutes ago, Gemmill said:

 

:lol:

 

I picture this like a scene from a Yorkshire version of The Machine Gunners. All grazed knees, hobnail boots and snot-caked top lips.

Sobbing into the teacakes as he pushes his Hovis pedal bike up the steepest hill in the world. 

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7 minutes ago, The Fish said:

Sobbing into the teacakes as he pushes his Hovis pedal bike up the steepest hill in the world. 

 

This cunt would be riding it. Highest gear so his legs are a blur but he's only going 0.5 mph faster than the old biddy walking up the hill.

 

"Ey up Martin. What's tha mitherin' about?" 

 

"*pant* You *pant* wouldnt *pant* UNDERSTAND *pant*, Auntie *pant* June. BYEEEEE!"

 

*30 seconds later*

 

"You're still here, Martin. Does tha want a push?" 

 

"UGH! BYE AUNTIE JUNE!" 

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3 minutes ago, Gemmill said:

 

This cunt would be riding it. Highest gear so his legs are a blur but he's only going 0.5 mph faster than the old biddy walking up the hill.

 

"Ey up Martin. What's tha mitherin' about?" 

 

"*pant* You *pant* wouldnt *pant* UNDERSTAND *pant*, Auntie *pant* June. BYEEEEE!"

 

*30 seconds later*

 

"You're still here, Martin. Does tha want a push?" 

 

"UGH! BYE AUNTIE JUNE!" 

 

Only thing going faster than his legs are three geriatrics going down the same hill in a bathtub.

bbc no GIF by britbox

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6 minutes ago, Gemmill said:

 

This cunt would be riding it. Highest gear so his legs are a blur but he's only going 0.5 mph faster than the old biddy walking up the hill.

 

"Ey up Martin. What's tha mitherin' about?" 

 

"*pant* You *pant* wouldnt *pant* UNDERSTAND *pant*, Auntie *pant* June. BYEEEEE!"

 

*30 seconds later*

 

"You should get taxi 'ome instead of struggling on t'bicycle, why don't you telephone your mate CT, 'ees taxi driver int'ee? 'Ee wa just talking about you t'other day asking if I 'ad any photographs of you from childhood? Seemed a lovely chap, reminded me of local hero sir Jimmy Savile before 'ee went rogue."

 

"UGH! BYE AUNTIE JUNE!"

 

 

Does CT know everybody's relatives? :unsure2:

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3 hours ago, Dr Gloom said:

polo neck tucked in to chinos - of course its 29 years old 

Aye, and it wasn’t fucking fashionable then either :lol: it does make me feel old, however 

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32 minutes ago, PaddockLad said:

 

talking about this with me brother for quite a while yesterday. 

only a matter of time before this shite is challenged, preferably by us and that we set the wheels in motion for the showdown over the next couple of weeks.

fuck ffp, fuck richard masters, fuck liverpool and their mates......

let's spend billions, starting today!  :)

Edited by thebrokendoll
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Aye, the idea behind FFP was supposed to be that we wouldn't see clubs taking on massive levels of debt and risking their existence like Leeds did. So while we have clubs like ours who could easily spend £1bn and not incur a penny of debt we have clubs like Barcelona with a debt of over £1bn still winning La Liga and Man U with similar debt but able to spend over £100m in transfers every season. It's a joke and I'm surprised that no one has challenged it under EU law.

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Imagine companies like Facebook (meta or whatever they're called) Google, X all coming together and pushing for a law to say that companies are only allowed to spend a certain amount.  It basically keeps them at the top table.

 

That's probably a really shit analogy but I know what I mean :cuppa:

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37 minutes ago, wykikitoon said:

Imagine companies like Facebook (meta or whatever they're called) Google, X all coming together and pushing for a law to say that companies are only allowed to spend a certain amount.  It basically keeps them at the top table.

 

That's probably a really shit analogy but I know what I mean :cuppa:

Thank fuck for that. :smile:

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1 hour ago, ewerk said:

Aye, the idea behind FFP was supposed to be that we wouldn't see clubs taking on massive levels of debt and risking their existence like Leeds did. So while we have clubs like ours who could easily spend £1bn and not incur a penny of debt we have clubs like Barcelona with a debt of over £1bn still winning La Liga and Man U with similar debt but able to spend over £100m in transfers every season. It's a joke and I'm surprised that no one has challenged it under EU law.

I think marrying debt-linked transfer guidelines with rules about minimum % of players in the squad from within a certain geographical area would help too. Would mean teams wouldn't be able to stockpile scores of young players to send out on loan (Chelsea) or flood their team with players from abroad (Spurs).

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  • Monkeys Fist changed the title to 2024/25 - Generic NUFC Chat. Cunts ☑️

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