Ayatollah Hermione 13856 Posted December 2, 2021 Share Posted December 2, 2021 I simply lean onto one cheek in a manner reminiscent of Steve McQueen manoeuvring a car through the tightly wound streets of San Francisco. 5 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tom 14011 Posted December 2, 2021 Share Posted December 2, 2021 You need a powerful squat if you go wild camping that’s all I’m saying. Balance is important, especially after a drink 4 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Monkeys Fist 42356 Posted December 2, 2021 Share Posted December 2, 2021 I suppose it’s time to retell my tale of the time I took a shit off a 800-1000ft cliff? Standing/squatting , of course. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gemmill 44784 Posted December 2, 2021 Author Share Posted December 2, 2021 Standing. Now go on. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Monkeys Fist 42356 Posted December 2, 2021 Share Posted December 2, 2021 Held on to a tree at the top, hung my hoop over the edge, opened the bomb bay doors, watched it drop, disappear from view, then burst out laughing as a brown circle suddenly appeared at the foot of the cliff. Minging, aye, ticked off the bucket list, aye that too. The stars were truly aligned as my firm ejecta was also the Holy Grail of shites- a ghost wipe…not a mark on the paper. 7 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Isegrim 9761 Posted December 2, 2021 Share Posted December 2, 2021 Sitting obviously. As i have discovered the wonders of psyllium I hardly need any wiping anyway. Rarely more than one piece of toilet paper. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Alex 35055 Posted December 2, 2021 Share Posted December 2, 2021 16 minutes ago, Isegrim said: Sitting obviously. As i have discovered the wonders of psyllium I hardly need any wiping anyway. Rarely more than one piece of toilet paper. Never had you down as the magic mushrooms type Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Isegrim 9761 Posted December 2, 2021 Share Posted December 2, 2021 3 hours ago, Alex said: Never had you down as the magic mushrooms type you might mix something up. The stuff does magic to my intestines but that’s about it 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gemmill 44784 Posted December 2, 2021 Author Share Posted December 2, 2021 Psyllium Husk? It's awful stuff, what are you putting that in? Or just having it by the spoonful? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Monkeys Fist 42356 Posted December 2, 2021 Share Posted December 2, 2021 Rams it up the poopchute. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dr Gloom 21911 Posted December 2, 2021 Share Posted December 2, 2021 This was already strange thread 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RobinRobin 11256 Posted December 3, 2021 Share Posted December 3, 2021 Sitting, obviously. Anyone saying otherwise is just weird (or MF, which is the same thing). 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Toonpack 9377 Posted December 3, 2021 Share Posted December 3, 2021 Sitter, seem to recall same subject here many years ago and there were a number of heretical standers, seems they are either avoiding this thread or have seen the errors of their ways. I intend to be a sitter until I pop my clogs, unless I get some affliction that will make me a shit my pants/bed lie downer Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Isegrim 9761 Posted December 3, 2021 Share Posted December 3, 2021 11 hours ago, Gemmill said: Psyllium Husk? It's awful stuff, what are you putting that in? Or just having it by the spoonful? Yoghurt. It’s awful but does work wonders and does hopefully prevent another major operation. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gemmill 44784 Posted December 3, 2021 Author Share Posted December 3, 2021 From the judge won't budge to Judge Smoothstool. Glad to hear you're sorted btw. 4 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kevin Carr's Gloves 3887 Posted December 3, 2021 Share Posted December 3, 2021 It's a pity Quiff is away cos he's a massive arsewipe. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Isegrim 9761 Posted December 3, 2021 Share Posted December 3, 2021 3 hours ago, Gemmill said: From the judge won't budge to Judge Smoothstool. Glad to hear you're sorted btw. Thanks. I am a prosecutor nowadays who doesn’t take shit for an answer. 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Monkeys Fist 42356 Posted September 1, 2022 Share Posted September 1, 2022 With the recent defection of Trophyshy to the Righteous Standers Society, in the spirit of benevolence to the, as yet still unconverted medieval sitters, I present you this. Save you animals from digging in the dark. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RobinRobin 11256 Posted September 1, 2022 Share Posted September 1, 2022 Please don't Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gemmill 44784 Posted September 1, 2022 Author Share Posted September 1, 2022 It's mental how proud MF is of wiping his arse like a mong. "Is that all of it? One last push..... OK and what do you do now?" "PHTAND UP FOR MAMMY!" 1 5 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
strawb 4247 Posted September 1, 2022 Share Posted September 1, 2022 I assume he stands cos his arse is too big for him to wipe while sitting tbh 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Monkeys Fist 42356 Posted September 1, 2022 Share Posted September 1, 2022 You beasts sound like flat-earthers to we of the Enlightened Botty Brigade. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RobinRobin 11256 Posted September 1, 2022 Share Posted September 1, 2022 We aren't beasts - that's the point. We have evolved, unlike some 5 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Monkeys Fist 42356 Posted September 1, 2022 Share Posted September 1, 2022 1 hour ago, strawb said: I assume he stands cos his arse is too big for him to wipe while sitting tbh This makes no sense- an over-large arse would hamper the Higher Hoop Hygiene method which you smallcocks disparage. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RobinRobin 11256 Posted September 1, 2022 Share Posted September 1, 2022 3 minutes ago, Monkeys Fist said: This makes no sense- an over-large arse would hamper the Higher Hoop Hygiene method which you smallcocks disparage. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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