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And So This Is Christmas!


Monkeys Fist
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Charlie the cunt saying about the financial crisis.i laughed wife's old aunty called me an idiot and asked 'who would you prefer to rule us' 

 

😂 This is a women who is just shy of a millionaire living in area of foodbanks she volunteers at and then votes tories. 

 

Fuck off. 

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18 minutes ago, Ayatollah Hermione said:

Knew that good mood wouldn’t last 

I was speaking to a bloke last night. 

 

Got talking footy very early. Told him I was a mag he said he loves Geordies. Turned out he had a business and then worked in Newcastle. Wife walked out on him and he went to bits. He was talking about his hatred for the Tories even when he was making brass. 

 

My wife's aunt helps at two food banks and always moans about shops and jobs closing in her area. Yet still votes tory. 

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1 minute ago, Monkeys Fist said:

I’ve just had a very puzzled text from NASA saying they detected a super dense Brown Giant in my location. 
 

Boxing Day turd making an early appearance…

Star Trek Space GIF by Star Trek Fleet Command

 

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1 hour ago, Monkeys Fist said:

I’ve just had a very puzzled text from NASA saying they detected a super dense Brown Giant in my location. 
 

Boxing Day turd making an early appearance…

 

E73F19AD-B17C-4504-8457-658A0F67182A.jpeg

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Merry Christmas everyone. As others have said, this place has been a massive help to me, especially this year. Got to admit I'm glad the day is drawing to a close, today has been massively challenging. Im not sure I'll ever be able to really enjoy Christmas again if Im honest. Obviously I get some vicarious pleasure from the kids but that's honestly about it.

 

Got to see my MIL tomorrow which I'm dreading because, well never mind, but then at least I have a good excuse to leave early for the match on TV. Then I'm basically home and dry for the rest of the holidays just to relax. Ah well, fingers crossed 2023 will a time to reformat and enjoy things, rather than just get through life which is what it feels to me now. Sorry for the gloomy post but cheers anyway! 

 

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This place is big for a lot of people. Myself included. I get so many laughs and help from it and have done since Scots and Co. Set it up. 

 

Rents you've have a more challenging year than most kid. Hopefully us mongs you don't know have helped you out and in several years your young uns will bring their young uns round on crimbo day and you truly love it. But even if it's just a day of them enjoying it and you coming on here to take the piss and get by the cool. Have a good one and roll on us lifting a trophy x

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Well. All that fucking work with the spreadsheet and starting the dinner around 10 in the morning. No sooner had we sat down, everything done, first chance of the day to relax and enjoy the piping hot food... Her dad stands up, announces "You'll have to excuse me, I don't feel well...", walks as far as the kitchen door, sinks to his fucking knees, and there he stays slumped on the floor for the next half an hour. :lol:

 

By the time anyone returns to the table, their dinner is clay cold and ruined. Within half an hour, he's fine and boring the balls off me until HALF SEVEN when they finally leave. 

 

So aye, fuck you for another year, Christmas, ya cunt! 

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2 hours ago, Gemmill said:

Well. All that fucking work with the spreadsheet and starting the dinner around 10 in the morning. No sooner had we sat down, everything done, first chance of the day to relax and enjoy the piping hot food... Her dad stands up, announces "You'll have to excuse me, I don't feel well...", walks as far as the kitchen door, sinks to his fucking knees, and there he stays slumped on the floor for the next half an hour. :lol:

 

By the time anyone returns to the table, their dinner is clay cold and ruined. Within half an hour, he's fine and boring the balls off me until HALF SEVEN when they finally leave. 

 

So aye, fuck you for another year, Christmas, ya cunt! 


:lol: That’s where planning will get you. Life is undiluted chaos, you cannot control it. 

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Our lass asked me to carve ours in the kitchen a few minutes before serving. I should have had a mask, gown and scalpel :lol: 

 

I didn’t know whether to put it back in the oven or call a vet.

 

And she’s been winning at this for 35 years. Anyway a mainly vegy dinner it was.

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3 hours ago, Gemmill said:

Well. All that fucking work with the spreadsheet and starting the dinner around 10 in the morning. No sooner had we sat down, everything done, first chance of the day to relax and enjoy the piping hot food... Her dad stands up, announces "You'll have to excuse me, I don't feel well...", walks as far as the kitchen door, sinks to his fucking knees, and there he stays slumped on the floor for the next half an hour. :lol:

 

By the time anyone returns to the table, their dinner is clay cold and ruined. Within half an hour, he's fine and boring the balls off me until HALF SEVEN when they finally leave. 

 

So aye, fuck you for another year, Christmas, ya cunt! 


He is patently a deep cover member of ISIS he was slyly asking allah what he should do in regard to the pigs in blankets.

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12 minutes ago, Christmas Tree said:

Our lass asked me to carve ours in the kitchen a few minutes before serving. I should have had a mask, gown and scalpel :lol: 

 

I didn’t know whether to put it back in the oven or call a vet.

 

And she’s been winning at this for 35 years. Anyway a mainly vegy dinner it was.


Always cook our Turkey overnight Xmas eve, bird, stuffing (homemade, old family recipe) wrapped in bacon. Put it on about 9-10 ish at 125, never fails.

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I’ve been ill since November. Had the flu, caused sinusitis, got over that, go to my mams for xmas and my fucking brother gives me the flu again.

 

Like the fucking warrior I am I still did the full dinner on my tod, had a number of large baileys and fell asleep at 3.45pm. 
 

Got a houseful coming round today (first xmas without my dad), I feel like after my heroics yesterday I should be entitled to fuck everyone off and watch the football in silence on my own

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6 hours ago, Gemmill said:

Well. All that fucking work with the spreadsheet and starting the dinner around 10 in the morning. No sooner had we sat down, everything done, first chance of the day to relax and enjoy the piping hot food... Her dad stands up, announces "You'll have to excuse me, I don't feel well...", walks as far as the kitchen door, sinks to his fucking knees, and there he stays slumped on the floor for the next half an hour. :lol:

 

By the time anyone returns to the table, their dinner is clay cold and ruined. Within half an hour, he's fine and boring the balls off me until HALF SEVEN when they finally leave. 

 

So aye, fuck you for another year, Christmas, ya cunt! 

 

I'm certainly not an expert on excel but aren't those little boxes called cells? Should've made another one for 'FiL Keeling Over' or called it xKO or something? 

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On 24/12/2022 at 17:35, Gemmill said:

image.thumb.png.f0bf5bd76fb2325951dc69216561f10e.png

 

The true spirit of Christmas!

Would have used a Gantt chart if I got remotely involved in cooking the dinner.

 

My job was entertaining the little'un. So I basically played with Hot Wheels, pretended to be a dragon, and read books, while Mrs Fish cooked everything.

 

Pretty standard Sunday to be fair.

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Hope you all had a fabulous Christmas. I took a few days away from this place and engaged in some pretty heavy drinking sessions. Christmas Eve being particularly shocking :lol:

 

Did particularly well in the betting stakes and won £400 the last few days. Also won at poker on Monday night too. 

 

Was headhunted for a job and had the interview last Thursday so just waiting to hear back about that. 

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