The Fish 10779 Posted June 1, 2021 Share Posted June 1, 2021 38 minutes ago, Rayvin said: Based on that profile there'd be an inevitable injury for me in the first 5 mins of game one, followed by missing the rest of the tournament Followed by an open letter, where you apologise to each and every fan, each team mate, each member of staff and each opponent. 4 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Alex 34912 Posted June 1, 2021 Share Posted June 1, 2021 I’ve been on holiday to Scotland. However, I’ve retired from international football 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kevin Carr's Gloves 3859 Posted June 1, 2021 Share Posted June 1, 2021 1 hour ago, PaddockLad said: Colin Hendie's mum would be better than that cunt On a side note, the Toontastic " Team Caledonia " for the Euros is shaping up well... 1. Myself (player manager obvs) 2. Yourself (rapier-like centre forward) 3. @Rayvin (cultured, cerebral midfield creator) 4. @Toonpack (travel manager,we're all staying in his caravan at Thirlestane 😉 ) 5. @Kevin Carr's Gloves (half time oranges) As long as I don't have to break into a light jog delivering those oranges. 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PaddockLad 17124 Posted June 1, 2021 Share Posted June 1, 2021 22 minutes ago, Alex said: I’ve been on holiday to Scotland. However, I’ve retired from international football You'll get an approach before the weekend...a bottle of Glenfiddich & a poond o' square sausage 😉 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PaddockLad 17124 Posted June 1, 2021 Share Posted June 1, 2021 2 minutes ago, Kevin Carr's Gloves said: As long as I don't have to break into a light jog delivering those oranges. Bring your tank mate, we'll need it at the back and it's probably more mobile than Hanley 👍 1 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Alex 34912 Posted June 1, 2021 Share Posted June 1, 2021 7 minutes ago, PaddockLad said: You'll get an approach before the weekend...a bottle of Glenfiddich & a poond o' square sausage 😉 Ok, I’m in 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Fish 10779 Posted June 1, 2021 Share Posted June 1, 2021 1 hour ago, PaddockLad said: You'll get an approach before the weekend...a bottle of Glenfiddich & a poond o' square sausage 😉 Can't find a decent Lorne sausage anywhere south of BANNOCKBURN Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tom 14011 Posted June 1, 2021 Share Posted June 1, 2021 My aunt lives in Scotland, she says it’s quite nice. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Blastronaut 1333 Posted June 1, 2021 Share Posted June 1, 2021 9 minutes ago, Tom said: My aunt lives in Scotland, she says it’s quite nice. Can you play center half? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Alex 34912 Posted June 1, 2021 Share Posted June 1, 2021 Can he ever? Looks like an extra from Braveheart as well 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Toonpack 9298 Posted June 1, 2021 Share Posted June 1, 2021 1 hour ago, The Fish said: Can't find a decent Lorne sausage anywhere south of BANNOCKBURN Oh yes you can Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Fish 10779 Posted June 1, 2021 Share Posted June 1, 2021 4 minutes ago, Toonpack said: Oh yes you can Allright, fucking Bellingham then! 1 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Blastronaut 1333 Posted June 1, 2021 Share Posted June 1, 2021 4 hours ago, The Fish said: Can't find a decent Lorne sausage anywhere south of BANNOCKBURN That's fucking creepy like. Have i been doxxed or did I publicly share my home address on here when I was pissed the other night? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Blastronaut 1333 Posted June 1, 2021 Share Posted June 1, 2021 7 hours ago, PaddockLad said: Colin Hendie's mum would be better than that cunt On a side note, the Toontastic " Team Caledonia " for the Euros is shaping up well... 1. Myself (player manager obvs) 2. Yourself (rapier-like centre forward) 3. @Rayvin (cultured, cerebral midfield creator) 4. @Toonpack (travel manager,we're all staying in his caravan at Thirlestane 😉 ) 5. @Kevin Carr's Gloves (half time oranges) Embarrassment of riches that. Im shite at football to be honest but if you stick me up front nobody will notice. Plus it's safe to say I've got a better haircut than that Lyndon Dykes. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TheGingerQuiff 2412 Posted June 1, 2021 Author Share Posted June 1, 2021 Ct can batter the half time Mars bars Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Monkeys Fist 42129 Posted June 1, 2021 Share Posted June 1, 2021 My great grandad was a porridge wog- and I can do a passable Sean Connery accent. Can I be John McCarver? 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TheGingerQuiff 2412 Posted June 1, 2021 Author Share Posted June 1, 2021 I don't know what a porridge wog is, but I'd be banned AGAIN if I posted what came into my head. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Monkeys Fist 42129 Posted June 1, 2021 Share Posted June 1, 2021 6 minutes ago, TheGingerQuiff said: I don't know what a porridge wog is, but I'd be banned AGAIN if I posted what came into my head. This description of the Dwarf Porridge Wog is pretty much on the button. “There are many traditional stories around about the tight fisted nature of Porridge Wogs however I have never met one that is over 5 feet 6 tall who is anything other than generous to a fault. However, I have yet to meet one under 5 feet 6 tall who would buy a drink for anyone. This strange breed of Dwarf Porridge Wog has an amazing sense of balance due to the possession of a chip on each shoulder. Whilst the common or garden full size Porridge Wog is an open minded life and soul of the party the Dwarf Porridge Wog never tires of telling you how great Scotchland is yet he never has the decency to bugger off back there and leave us all in peace.” 6 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Blastronaut 1333 Posted June 1, 2021 Share Posted June 1, 2021 1 hour ago, Monkeys Fist said: This description of the Dwarf Porridge Wog is pretty much on the button. “There are many traditional stories around about the tight fisted nature of Porridge Wogs however I have never met one that is over 5 feet 6 tall who is anything other than generous to a fault. However, I have yet to meet one under 5 feet 6 tall who would buy a drink for anyone. This strange breed of Dwarf Porridge Wog has an amazing sense of balance due to the possession of a chip on each shoulder. Whilst the common or garden full size Porridge Wog is an open minded life and soul of the party the Dwarf Porridge Wog never tires of telling you how great Scotchland is yet he never has the decency to bugger off back there and leave us all in peace.” No issues with the poison dwarf/short man syndrome digs, but Wogs? Bugger off back and leave us all in peace? Somecunt feel like telling this bigot what year it is? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Monkeys Fist 42129 Posted June 2, 2021 Share Posted June 2, 2021 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Alex 34912 Posted June 2, 2021 Share Posted June 2, 2021 10 hours ago, TheGingerQuiff said: Ct can batter the half time Mars bars Haven’t heard a euphemism this good in a long time 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Fish 10779 Posted June 2, 2021 Share Posted June 2, 2021 13 hours ago, Blastronaut said: That's fucking creepy like. Have i been doxxed or did I publicly share my home address on here when I was pissed the other night? It's on the list of Scottish place names I know without having to think that hard. Along with Edinburgh, Glasgow, Loch Ness and Tobamory. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Monkeys Fist 42129 Posted June 2, 2021 Share Posted June 2, 2021 2 hours ago, The Fish said: It's on the list of Scottish place names I know without having to think that hard. Along with Edinburgh, Glasgow, Loch Ness and Tobamory. No Balamory? What’s the story? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sammynb 3353 Posted June 2, 2021 Share Posted June 2, 2021 10 minutes ago, Monkeys Fist said: What’s the story morning Balamory? Shirley? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Fish 10779 Posted June 2, 2021 Share Posted June 2, 2021 24 minutes ago, Monkeys Fist said: No Balamory? What’s the story? genuinely got them mixed up and had meant Balamory. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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