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Tonights excuse...


sweetleftpeg
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Will we get a brand spanking new excuse or an old gem?  

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"How the fuck I was I supposed to know they score more goals than us!!!!!!"

87449[/snapback]

 

that Andy Cole's goal doesn't count because he's not a proper player

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"Ive just been told they cheated by watching us in another game. Also they practiced what they would do against us. How do we compete with that?"

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"Ive just been told they cheated by watching us in another game.  Also they practiced what they would do against us.  How do we compete with that?"

87499[/snapback]

 

Its a disgrace, they even employed such sneaky, underhand things like "tactics", "formations", "organisation", "gameplans" and tried to score "goals", well i mean how is Souness expected to counteract that!

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to be fair all this media specualtion about how secure my job is has affected the players, so if all the reporters could leave us alone we'd perform a lot better. Also the pressure from the fans is clearly having a detrimental impact on the morale of my proper players, so if they wan't their team to win it'd be handy if they could not come and watch.

 

I promise that after every game I'll pass word through the chairman and the local rag how well we've played... I promise I won't lie and I'll absolutely take the blame for any and every defeat and never once will I blame luck, the conditions or injuries...

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So Graham .. Graham? Anyone seen ...

 

.. Oh hello?

 

Arnt you ..

 

Jeremy Beadle?

 

 

... Aaaaah you bastard!

 

Now I see whats been going on!

Edited by JawD
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So Graham .. Graham? Anyone seen ...

 

.. Oh hello?

 

Arnt you ..

 

Jeremy Beadle?

 

 

... Aaaaah you bastard! 

 

Now I see whats been going on!

87538[/snapback]

 

It does seem to be the biggest ever staged practical joke, i mean nobody seriously could have been this shite and this much of a prick without it being a joke!

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"When we first arrived at the ground Deano wanted to know where the tactics were and after I finally talked him through how to find them, he went and ate them all the bastid! Mind you he has a really minty fresh breath now."

Edited by sammynb
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Souness's excuse list:

 

"I know we've got players coming back from injury, but they're still not 100% and half the team have a bug which didn't exist before kick off but I've just thought of as an excuse."

 

"I planned to sort out some tactics, but the wife started nagging me to go shopping and then I had to pick up the kids from school. My family is important to me you know."

 

"Our minds weren't focussed on the game tonight. Unfortunately we had some bad new earlier on because Clarky's dog died. The lads are all gutted. When a tragedy like this happens, football doesn't seem important."

 

"I, err, I mean Deano stepped on a crack in the pavement the other day. What hope is there when you haven't got lady luck on your side? This club is cursed."

 

"Personally, I blame my father. He should have said 'No, I'll have a wank tonight instead love'."

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His 'actual' response:

 

"We had most of the ball but did nothing with it. The difference was that their two strikers, Andy Cole and Darius Vassell, were fantastic.

"We kept going right to the end, but at 2-0 we had to chase it and that's how their third came about.

 

"The third goal on the break maybe flatters them because I don't think 3-0 was a fair scoreline."

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whingeing about injuries now on MOTD.

87628[/snapback]

 

And basically no comment from his mates Lawrenson and Hansen, what a surprise. :naughty:

 

Where's that humble pie now Hansen? Twats.

Edited by Renton
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His 'actual' response:

 

"We had most of the ball but did nothing with it. The difference was that their two strikers, Andy Cole and Darius Vassell, were fantastic.

"We kept going right to the end, but at 2-0 we had to chase it and that's how their third came about.

 

"The third goal on the break maybe flatters them because I don't think 3-0 was a fair scoreline."

87626[/snapback]

 

What a load of shite. :naughty:

 

Listening to the match and seeing the highlights we were well and truly stuffed.

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