Holden McGroin 6785 Posted June 30, 2017 Share Posted June 30, 2017 3 hours ago, The Fish said: Bay's Transformers film have zero plot, zero time spent building the characters, they're CGI heavy, destruction-porn heavy, have terrible, terrible scripts and zero wit. They honestly had two characters who were racial stereotypes fighting a bad guy and the crux of it was a gag about robots having bollocks. The women in the films serve no purpose beyond giving the 2 dimensional leads something to rescue/ogle/roll their eyes at. They're awful films. Even the big set pieces are turd because the giant robots don't seem to have any weight to them. When characters from your childhood like Optimus Prime and Bumble Bee are clashing with their nemeses, you shouldn't be bored. I know I'm biased because I like Marvel's source material, but I was still very excited about Transformers. The early teasers looked cool, I was interested to see if, in a post Batman Begins time where an objectively ridiculous character was given new life, if Transformers could too? Bay's Transformers couldn't. These films don't even stack up against the cartoon movie from the 80s. Compare that to the biggest spectacle of the Marvel stable; the Avengers. Whedon took time to give each of the heroes a stake in the climax, the scripts were decent, there was humour and when the big CGI-fest appeared it felt more like the crescendo of a well-paced story, rather than something to distract us because it's been 5 minutes since Michael Bay blew something up. compared to tl;dr If the Marvel movies are Obama, Transformers are Trump. And they are purely targeted at kids. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Fish 10972 Posted June 30, 2017 Share Posted June 30, 2017 3 hours ago, David Kelly said: You can't possibly say I was wrong when I said I enjoyed it more than anything else. My enjoyment is a totally personal thing. As it goes, I enjoyed it much less than Guardians, Logan, X Men and Deadpool, a bit less than Dr Strange and Ant Man but more than the second Avengers, Civil War, the last Batman, Wonder Woman (apart from the sheer pleasure of looking at Gadot) and Suicide Squad (apart from Robie's arse). It may well be that my expectations were so low for the latest transformers that it allowed me to enjoy it more than the superhero films that I actually have some investment in the characters but whatever the reason I did enjoy it more. It is without doubt a poor film though and Bay is a poor director. The only films of his that I would ever consider rewatching are The Rock, Bad Boys and maybe The Island and The First Transformers. Edit: The new Spiderman looks horrific btw. I was mostly joking, but the Transformers movies are utterly shit. Just curious, which Marvel movies did you enjoy less than the latest Transformers one? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rayvin 5310 Posted June 30, 2017 Share Posted June 30, 2017 2 minutes ago, The Fish said: I was mostly joking, but the Transformers movies are utterly shit. Just curious, which Marvel movies did you enjoy less than the latest Transformers one? Age of Ultron. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Fish 10972 Posted June 30, 2017 Share Posted June 30, 2017 44 minutes ago, Holden McGroin said: And they are purely targeted at kids. So is the Power Rangers movie, and even that is better than Bay's Transformers. More wit, more character, and so on. Disney movies are aimed at kids, for the most. Pixar too. They're not offensive horseshit Hells Bells, the Lego movies are better written, better directed than Bay's movies. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Fish 10972 Posted June 30, 2017 Share Posted June 30, 2017 1 minute ago, Rayvin said: Age of Ultron. Wasn't great, that's fair enough. I've not seen Bay's latest porno, but I'd be amazed if it was better than any of the recent Marvel films. Elektra, Daredevil, Ghost Rider, sure, but not the recent ones. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
David Kelly 1260 Posted July 3, 2017 Share Posted July 3, 2017 On 30/06/2017 at 5:02 PM, The Fish said: I was mostly joking, but the Transformers movies are utterly shit. Just curious, which Marvel movies did you enjoy less than the latest Transformers one? The ones I said in the post you quoted. The second avengers and Civil War. And you can add the first Captain America, the second Thor and the third Iron Man too. All of those are turgid. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Fish 10972 Posted July 3, 2017 Share Posted July 3, 2017 13 minutes ago, David Kelly said: The ones I said in the post you quoted. The second avengers and Civil War. And you can add the first Captain America, the second Thor and the third Iron Man too. All of those are turgid. I'll have to watch the latest Transformers movie, but I'd be staggered if it was better than Civil War, Cap 1. The other 3 aren't great films, Avengers AoU leant more towards everything that's bad with big blockbuster movies, but still retained some humour and benefited from already established characters. Civil War is a good blockbuster, plotchasms aside. If for no other reason than the big set pieces (Tunnel chase, Airport scene) were excellent bits of action cinema. Captain America is better on a second viewing imo, but I get the criticism. Thor 2 and Iron Man 3 were poor by Marvel's high standards, no doubt. I guess my problem with Transformers is that it lets itself down by not delivering anything that I expect from a big blockbuster. It's not fun, it's not funny, the editing and construction of action sequences is bewildering and oddly boring. The movies drag along and the perfunctory battles do little to quicken the pulse. I know it's all personal opinion, but you're the first person I've ever seen say they enjoyed any of them and it's surprised me. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
David Kelly 1260 Posted July 3, 2017 Share Posted July 3, 2017 35 minutes ago, The Fish said: I'll have to watch the latest Transformers movie, but I'd be staggered if it was better than Civil War, Cap 1. The other 3 aren't great films, Avengers AoU leant more towards everything that's bad with big blockbuster movies, but still retained some humour and benefited from already established characters. Civil War is a good blockbuster, plotchasms aside. If for no other reason than the big set pieces (Tunnel chase, Airport scene) were excellent bits of action cinema. Captain America is better on a second viewing imo, but I get the criticism. Thor 2 and Iron Man 3 were poor by Marvel's high standards, no doubt. I guess my problem with Transformers is that it lets itself down by not delivering anything that I expect from a big blockbuster. It's not fun, it's not funny, the editing and construction of action sequences is bewildering and oddly boring. The movies drag along and the perfunctory battles do little to quicken the pulse. I know it's all personal opinion, but you're the first person I've ever seen say they enjoyed any of them and it's surprised me. I thought Civil War was terrible. Totally bloated and almost completely lacking in fun (Spiderman aside). Despite the action sequences I was bored to death by it. I found it very similar to Age of Ultron. Cap 1 is just like Wonder Woman without the benefit of Gadot. Obviously I realise it's a bit more original but I really don't go for the superhero films set in the past (except the recent X-Men ones which I thought did it well). It's a shame because I really enjoyed The Winter Soldier. I don't want it to sound like I rate the Transformers films though. The first one was ok but the rest are pretty much dross. It was just that I went in to the theatre (I've got a limitless card for the Odeon or there's no way I would have gone to see it) with really low expectations for this one. Even my mate who I usually go with, who will watch any shite, said he was expecting us to walk out of it part way through given the reviews it got. There was loads of things wrong with it but despite that I found it reasonable fun. The thing is, I see the Marvel (and even now the DC) films getting decent to good reviews (Ultron, Wonder Woman and Suicide Squad got 4 stars in Empire, Civil War got 5) but they're giving Transformers a mauling. I'm certainly not going to defend Bay, who I don't rate at all, but those superhero films, while better made, aren't that much more enjoyable. Even when I do like comic books. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Andrew 4872 Posted July 3, 2017 Share Posted July 3, 2017 6 minutes ago, David Kelly said: I don't want it to sound like I rate the Transformers films though. An important and worthwhile clarification! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Fish 10972 Posted July 3, 2017 Share Posted July 3, 2017 6 minutes ago, David Kelly said: The thing is, I see the Marvel (and even now the DC) films getting decent to good reviews (Ultron, Wonder Woman and Suicide Squad got 4 stars in Empire, Civil War got 5) but they're giving Transformers a mauling. I'm certainly not going to defend Bay, who I don't rate at all, but those superhero films, while better made, aren't that much more enjoyable. Even when I do like comic books. I don't really bother with star ratings to be honest. Suicide Squad was rightly mauled by the critics and the fans, AoU and WW rec'd much higher star ratings than SS I'd say the criticism of both films is fairly well known. The trouble, for me, is that while the missteps in those films (AoU and WW) are poor, the overall film delivers on its remit. Transformers doesn't. I think I'm in the same camp as Kermode, it's not just that Transformers are bad movies, it's that they're not even aiming for good any more. It's just bang crash wallop buy my toys. And they're offensive, skeezy, with a sense of humour that can also be found in Madea/Mrs Brown's boys. I get that you didn't necessarily think it's a good movie, but I'm surprised that you don't think it's a terrible movie. I'll have a watch of it, try and be objective, and see if I'm way off, but Bay's movies always leave me angry. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
David Kelly 1260 Posted July 3, 2017 Share Posted July 3, 2017 1 minute ago, The Fish said: I don't really bother with star ratings to be honest. Suicide Squad was rightly mauled by the critics and the fans, AoU and WW rec'd much higher star ratings than SS I'd say the criticism of both films is fairly well known. The trouble, for me, is that while the missteps in those films (AoU and WW) are poor, the overall film delivers on its remit. Transformers doesn't. I think I'm in the same camp as Kermode, it's not just that Transformers are bad movies, it's that they're not even aiming for good any more. It's just bang crash wallop buy my toys. And they're offensive, skeezy, with a sense of humour that can also be found in Madea/Mrs Brown's boys. I get that you didn't necessarily think it's a good movie, but I'm surprised that you don't think it's a terrible movie. I'll have a watch of it, try and be objective, and see if I'm way off, but Bay's movies always leave me angry. I think the issue here is more my use of comic book films as a comparison. I can't actually think of a poorer film I've seen in a long time than Transformers. If Hopkins can be made to look like he's never acted in his life then it's obviously doing something very wrong. Yet I could still find some fun in it (maybe actually because it's so bad). I really struggled to that with the Marvel/DC films that I mentioned despite wanting to. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Meenzer 15737 Posted July 4, 2017 Share Posted July 4, 2017 I see Tarantino's new fiancée has previous. Hope he uses her as his muse. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Park Life 71 Posted July 4, 2017 Share Posted July 4, 2017 (edited) Yuk. Ugly and Uglier. Edited July 4, 2017 by Park Life Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dr Gloom 22185 Posted July 4, 2017 Share Posted July 4, 2017 tarantino is creepy as Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Park Life 71 Posted July 4, 2017 Share Posted July 4, 2017 6 minutes ago, Dr Gloom said: tarantino is creepy as People without lips are well dodgy. It's like nature is trying to tell you something. /Parkypseudoscience Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dr Gloom 22185 Posted July 4, 2017 Share Posted July 4, 2017 it's like people whose eyes are too close together 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Park Life 71 Posted July 4, 2017 Share Posted July 4, 2017 Bingo! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ewerk 31225 Posted July 4, 2017 Share Posted July 4, 2017 Body shaming bullies, both of you. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dr Gloom 22185 Posted July 4, 2017 Share Posted July 4, 2017 as if i would Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rayvin 5310 Posted July 5, 2017 Share Posted July 5, 2017 23 hours ago, Meenzer said: I see Tarantino's new fiancée has previous. Hope he uses her as his muse. That is horrific. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kid Dynamite 7182 Posted July 5, 2017 Share Posted July 5, 2017 I watched Wonder Woman because the press has been banging on about it being the best superhero film in years What a pile of shite it was. Way too long, ripped off the Captain America WW2 setting and finished off with a big CGI mess of a fight scene 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dr Gloom 22185 Posted July 5, 2017 Share Posted July 5, 2017 Just now, Kid Dynamite said: I watched Wonder Woman because the press has been banging on about it being the best superhero film in years What a pile of shite it was. Way too long, ripped off the Captain America WW2 setting and finished off with a big CGI mess of a fight scene sounds like pretty much every superhero movie ever made then. #fishbaiting Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Park Life 71 Posted July 5, 2017 Share Posted July 5, 2017 21 minutes ago, Kid Dynamite said: I watched Wonder Woman because the press has been banging on about it being the best superhero film in years What a pile of shite it was. Way too long, ripped off the Captain America WW2 setting and finished off with a big CGI mess of a fight scene These are some actual lines from the film: ''Men are not needed for pleasure'' ''I wanted to be an actor but my colour means there is no place for me'' Native American about Chris Pine..''His people wiped out my people''. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rayvin 5310 Posted July 5, 2017 Share Posted July 5, 2017 (edited) 5 minutes ago, Park Life said: These are some actual lines from the film: ''Men are not needed for pleasure'' ''I wanted to be an actor but my colour means there is no place for me'' Native American about Chris Pine..''His people wiped out my people''. Seriously? SJW marketing is a big selling point atm apparently. There's an article in the Guardian today about what the world would be like if women ruled it, and one of the cited authors mentions that men would pay reparations to women for centuries of historical abuse and undervaluation of female work at home. The world we live in Edited July 5, 2017 by Rayvin Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Meenzer 15737 Posted July 5, 2017 Share Posted July 5, 2017 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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