Film/moving picture show you most recently watched

[Rayvin 5166]

Ewok.

[Alex 34795]

Must have watched Zatoichi about 6 times. Stone cold classic. It's basically me dealing with Renton, Gloom and Ewok.

 

 

That bit where they're betting on the roll of a dice and he keeps guessing right

[Anorthernsoul 1221]

Aye, he's in fucking loads of them. I'll have a think as I used to watch loads and they all seem to blur into one after a while (I know, "Reported"). However, I would recommend Zatoichi, not a Yakuza film, it's a samurai film with him in but the mood is more akin to the Sergio Leone Spaghetti Westerns (which were heavily influenced by Japanese cinema / Kurosawa anyway, as you probably know).

Another Lonely Hitman was decent, off the top of my head.

 

 

Cheers. I'll scout them out.  I'm going to watch "Tokyo Drifter" this afternoon.

[Park Life 71]

Bit boring in parts and some very long takes with little camera movement but absolutely lush on Blu ray.

 

[Howay 12496]

The sequel has received a barnstorming 1 out of 5 stars in the Guardian. Sure you aren't tempted?

 

I'm surprised it got as much as that. My lass was saying the second one is about him trying to have a normal relationship with her, he's such a fucking freak I guess it's difficult for him but I can't imagine how a movie between an awkward, cold, bloke and a ridiculously shy female could be riveting.

 

Thankfully my wife goes to see that sort of shite with her friends which saves me the trouble of sitting through it.

 

Aye that was the trick I missed out on. She's been on a bit of a tear recently by claiming all we watch is action type movies (she has a very broad definition of what counts as this) but this was a step too far, the ship is being righted after that shambles. I said I'd go to three films at the cinema that were completely her choice for her birthday a few years ago and she's been milking the hell out of it so I still have one of them (Cinderella and that me before you were the two so far), which she is saving for Beauty and the Beast so at least I know I'm not going to have to sit in the cinema and watch a second version of last nights show.

 

Haven't seen it (or read the book). I've seen some extracts from the latter however and found them about as erotic as the previously mentioned thought of Tim Healy and Denise Welch going at it hammer and tongs. Have these people never heard of Anais Nin? Rhetorical question, obvs

 

Honestly man that's the thing I kept saying throughout. It was so cold and sterile, it was like Dexter really. The lass in it is canny but everytime he got her kit off it was so cold seeming that it was like watching a bit of meat being prepped at an abattoir, fucking grim. The heffer that wrote it has some serious fucking issues like. No idea how this had such a fuss around it. He does the same sort of stuff in the Fall and they weren't fawning over him. 

One of the last scenes, oh aye SPOILER ALERT (), is him whipping her and it's probably less erotic than that scene where Rico gets whipped in Starship Troopers. 

[Park Life 71]

Get rid. There is nothing worse in life than an irritating clueless woman messing with your shit.

Edited February 10, 2017 by Park Life

[Howay 12496]

 
To be fair I'm giving her grief here, I was working on my laptop so said she could whack that on as she's been wanting to see it. I'm obviously going to count this as a movie we watched together mind.

[Alex 34795]

Cheers. I'll scout them out.  I'm going to watch "Tokyo Drifter" this afternoon.

As HF mentions, Ichi the Killer is class. Boiling Point too with, you've guessed it, Takeshi Kitano

[Alex 34795]

I'm surprised it got as much as that. My lass was saying the second one is about him trying to have a normal relationship with her, he's such a fucking freak I guess it's difficult for him but I can't imagine how a movie between an awkward, cold, bloke and a ridiculously shy female could be riveting.

 

 

Aye that was the trick I missed out on. She's been on a bit of a tear recently by claiming all we watch is action type movies (she has a very broad definition of what counts as this) but this was a step too far, the ship is being righted after that shambles. I said I'd go to three films at the cinema that were completely her choice for her birthday a few years ago and she's been milking the hell out of it so I still have one of them (Cinderella and that me before you were the two so far), which she is saving for Beauty and the Beast so at least I know I'm not going to have to sit in the cinema and watch a second version of last nights show.

 

 

Honestly man that's the thing I kept saying throughout. It was so cold and sterile, it was like Dexter really. The lass in it is canny but everytime he got her kit off it was so cold seeming that it was like watching a bit of meat being prepped at an abattoir, fucking grim. The heffer that wrote it has some serious fucking issues like. No idea how this had such a fuss around it. He does the same sort of stuff in the Fall and they weren't fawning over him. 

One of the last scenes, oh aye SPOILER ALERT ( ), is him whipping her and it's probably less erotic than that scene where Rico gets whipped in Starship Troopers. 

It's like the old boilers in some of the big offices I used to work in, i.e. it's the ones who never see any action are the ones who are always talking about it. That's the demographic in general.

Not saying that's what your lass is like btw

[Howay 12496]

It's like the old boilers in some of the big offices I used to work in, i.e. it's the ones who never see any action are the ones who are always talking about it. That's the demographic in general.

Not saying that's what your lass is like btw

Sounds about right, the sort that think he's so good looking they'd put up with the fact he's a lunatic because they have nowt going on.

It would be bad for them if my lass was the target market tbf since we watched it for nowt . I think the lass that wrote it fits that description in all, it was Twilight fan fiction wasn't it? Another steaming pile of shite. 

[Alex 34795]

Sounds about right, the sort that think he's so good looking they'd put up with the fact he's a lunatic because they have nowt going on.

It would be bad for them if my lass was the target market tbf since we watched it for nowt . I think the lass that wrote it fits that description in all, it was Twilight fan fiction wasn't it? Another steaming pile of shite. 

Aye, haven't watched Twilight either but I read somewhere it was fan fiction from that. She's made plenty money out of it like so fair play I suppose. As an aside, I did English for my degree and we once had to read a Mills and Boon book. Fuck me gently

[Howay 12496]

Aye, haven't watched Twilight either but I read somewhere it was fan fiction from that. She's made plenty money out of it like so fair play I suppose. As an aside, I did English for my degree and we once had to read a Mills and Boon book. Fuck me gently

I've seen one of them and parts of another, they're shite but clearly geared towards kids so I guess it makes even more sense that the person who wrote 50 Shades is a bit off if she's wanting to fantasize about a tween movie. Aye she must be worth a fortune to be fair so good for her, maybe she's realized how bonkers it all is now.

I couldn't imagine having to read one of them, the covers on them are enough of a clip. 

[David Kelly 1219]

If you haven't watched Twilight make sure you don't. I watched the first one not knowing really what it was and thinking it was just a vampire film.  Fucking horrendous.

[Howay 12496]

If you haven't watched Twilight make sure you don't. I watched the first one not knowing really what it was and thinking it was just a vampire film.  Fucking horrendous.

A vampire film that breaks basically every 'rule' about vampires. 'oh they can go outside, they just get shiny' fucking hell.

[Alex 34795]

I've seen one of them and parts of another, they're shite but clearly geared towards kids so I guess it makes even more sense that the person who wrote 50 Shades is a bit off if she's wanting to fantasize about a tween movie. Aye she must be worth a fortune to be fair so good for her, maybe she's realized how bonkers it all is now.

I couldn't imagine having to read one of them, the covers on them are enough of a clip. 

It's all like sex scenes without any actual descriptions of sex, "He ravaged her" and all that shite. It was basically to do with novels being written to a formula. Because there's fucking 100s of them but they're more or less all the same. But there's also some dodgy rape fantasy stuff in there which, as you can probably imagine, the right-on lecturers were all over like a rash.  The saving grace was you could probably read one in about an hour and a half.

[Alex 34795]

Is Twilight the one where the vampires all look like they've got the flu?

[David Kelly 1219]

A vampire film that breaks basically every 'rule' about vampires. 'oh they can go outside, they just get shiny' fucking hell.

I got forced into going to see a couple more of them with the ex too.  The next two, while still shite, were a lot better than the first.  But then the first part of the two part ending was one of the most embarrassing bits of cinema I've ever been forced to endure.  No amounts of promised sex could persuade me to go and see the final one with her. 

Edited February 10, 2017 by David Kelly

[Howay 12496]

It's all like sex scenes without any actual descriptions of sex, "He ravaged her" and all that shite. It was basically to do with novels being written to a formula. Because there's fucking 100s of them but they're more or less all the same. But there's also some dodgy rape fantasy stuff in there which, as you can probably imagine, the right-on lecturers were all over like a rash.  The saving grace was you could probably read one in about an hour and a half.

Sounds horrific. "Quivering" probably comes up a lot. There was a lot of shite like that in the film, he had a really weird thing about her biting her lip. The film actually had a good amount of laugh out loud moments in it (unintentional obviously), he would come out with some horrifically graphic thing at the most inappropriate time.

 

Is Twilight the one where the vampires all look like they've got the flu?

 

It is aye. As DK says it's complete and utter junk. That Pattinson lad is hopeless in all.

 

I got forced into going to see a couple more of them with the ex too.  The next two, while still shite, were a lot better than the first.  But then the first part of the two part ending was one of the most embarrassing bits of cinema I've ever been forced to endure.  No amounts of promised sex could persuade me to go and see the final one with her. 

I watched the first one under similar circumstances. I think I saw part of the second one on a plane as I was looking for anything to watch, the selection was terrible, I think I put Fast and Furious 7 on and got about 4 minutes in and it was so pathetic that I switched it off, did the same with the 2nd twilight, and I think I ended up watching some utter shite like Tower Heist.

[David Kelly 1219]

Sounds horrific. "Quivering" probably comes up a lot. There was a lot of shite like that in the film, he had a really weird thing about her biting her lip. The film actually had a good amount of laugh out loud moments in it (unintentional obviously), he would come out with some horrifically graphic thing at the most inappropriate time.

 

 

It is aye. As DK says it's complete and utter junk. That Pattinson lad is hopeless in all.

 

I watched the first one under similar circumstances. I think I saw part of the second one on a plane as I was looking for anything to watch, the selection was terrible, I think I put Fast and Furious 7 on and got about 4 minutes in and it was so pathetic that I switched it off, did the same with the 2nd twilight, and I think I ended up watching some utter shite like Tower Heist.

The twilight films make the fast and furious films and tower heist look like art house films by comparison.

[Howay 12496]

The twilight films make the fast and furious films and tower heist look like art house films by comparison.

It says a lot about both that I willingly sat through the entirety of Tower Heist rather than putting either of them back on.

[Park Life 71]

Sounds about right, the sort that think he's so good looking they'd put up with the fact he's a lunatic because they have nowt going on.

It would be bad for them if my lass was the target market tbf since we watched it for nowt . I think the lass that wrote it fits that description in all, it was Twilight fan fiction wasn't it? Another steaming pile of shite. 

Although Mrs P will sit through good films (I've been lining up) see loves a bit of that Twilight pap. Women are hard wired to like cack basically.

[Howay 12496]

Although Mrs P will sit through good films (I've been lining up) see loves a bit of that Twilight pap. Women are hard wired to like cack basically.

That comedian Bill Burr says it's their sports. It's true tbf, my Mrs will happily watch brilliant films, insightful documentaries etc but then will binge-watch The Kardashians, Gilmore girls, and watch the Twilight films. I ridicule her but then we all sit about discussing what certain players are doing off the field. I'll always argue that their cack is far worse than sports though.

[Renton 21238]

I got forced into going to see a couple more of them with the ex too. The next two, while still shite, were a lot better than the first. But then the first part of the two part ending was one of the most embarrassing bits of cinema I've ever been forced to endure. No amounts of promised sex could persuade me to go and see the final one with her.

I actually thought the first one was just about okay, but it got worse after that. I was forced to watch the third one, part one, in the cinema too. It was undoubtedly the worst film I've paid to see. No fucking way was I watching the next one after that shit.

 

Howay, what 's this about your lass wanting to see Cinderella and Beauty and the Beast? Never had you down as a wrong un.

[Anorthernsoul 1221]

Well Tokyo Drifter was class, Tetsu The Phoenix is some boy.

[Howay 12496]

 

Howay, what 's this about your lass wanting to see Cinderella and Beauty and the Beast? Never had you down as a wrong un.

:lol:

Fwiw Cinderella was dreadful (even for a kids film). I already know I wont like Beauty and the Beast as I remember as a kid I liked Gaston, no idea why the bloke that was a total fucking hero trying to kill the fucking monster that lives above the town got such flak. She's never getting this type of present again for her birthday as now Rent thinks I'm a Paul Wyn.