Generic small time football blather thread FOREVER

[Kid Dynamite 6860]

The bloke won the Ballon D'or at Liverpool and won them 5 trophies in 2 seasons and he's still hated  

 

https://www.google.co.uk/amp/s/www.sportbible.com/football/news-michael-owen-was-booed-by-liverpool-fans-on-anfield-return-yesterday-20190324.amp.html

[Monkeys Fist 41421]

2 hours ago, ewerk said:

All because the club’s Twitter account didn’t wish him a happy birthday on Tuesday.

You’d think they might’ve sent him some cinema tickets or a book or something. 

[Dougle 3238]

[Monkeys Fist 41421]

“I thought I was putting the pounds on until I saw my old mate Michael”

 

😉

 

https://www.google.com/amp/s/www.joe.co.uk/amp/sport/ronaldo-roberto-carlos-respond-michael-owens-weight-joke-106765

[Gemmill 42960]

His head looked like a fucking melon on telly the other night, the cheeky little dwarf. 

[Kevin Carr's Gloves 3723]

1 hour ago, Monkeys Fist said:

“I thought I was putting the pounds on until I saw my old mate Michael”

 

😉

 

https://www.google.com/amp/s/www.joe.co.uk/amp/sport/ronaldo-roberto-carlos-respond-michael-owens-weight-joke-106765

I thought that was Jason Manford for a second there.

[Monkeys Fist 41421]

1 minute ago, Kevin Carr's Gloves said:

I thought that was Jason Manford for a second there.

It is, but since they’re both chubby, unfunny, and sex pests on the text, they’re easily interchangeable. 

[Howmanheyman 31847]

Saw Jeff Hendrick in Sainsburys and despite worrying about the future, pensions, my next likely job, the missus health, my shit shift patterns and kids etc..... I looked at him, hoped he wouldn't notice me noticing him and felt sorry for the considerably richer and in a more comfortable life than me PL footballer, in fact I was almost embarrassed to see him. I can't see other midfielder's being intimidated by his presence put it that way, I could've blew him over. We're fucked with this 'current' squad. 

[Billy Whitehurst 869]

Michael Owen needs to look no further than Toontastic’s very own ‘Premier League Hall of Cunts’ thread to see what we think of him. It says something when you’re comfortably ahead of a convicted pedo who used to play for Sunderland.

[Gemmill 42960]

I've seen Dummett in Tesco and couldn't believe how slight he is. 

[wykikitoon 19399]

19 minutes ago, Gemmill said:

I've seen Dummett in Tesco and couldn't believe how slight he is. 

Did he keep dropping tins or something? 

[Gemmill 42960]

He couldn't even pick them up. 

[wykikitoon 19399]

I can see Bielsa walking soon

[RobinRobin 10770]

15 hours ago, wykikitoon said:

I can see Bielsa walking soon

Not too soon, hopefully.  Don't want a new manager bounce.

[Kid Dynamite 6860]

 

He's skilled at shoehorning completely immodest references to his own achievements into every conversation 

 

"Congratulations to you Emma, and to me for my win in 1998 as the first 18 year old to win this award waaaay before you did it..."  

[Howmanheyman 31847]

 

'I don't understand why people don't like me and also congratulations to that young tennis player who's finally managed to do what I did 23 years later. What took you so long, sweetheart?'

Edited December 20, 2021 by Howmanheyman

[Sonatine 11136]

He's absolutely shameless like, and the needy desperation to remind people of his achievements is equally tragic and hilarious.

 

Give it up Emo, nobody gives a toss about you 😂

[Gemmill 42960]

His skull is about three times the size of that now. HGH. 

[Howmanheyman 31847]

Just now, Gemmill said:

His skull is about three times the size of that now. HGH. 

High T?

[Gemmill 42960]

The points are gone, and fuck all will come of it, but it's still the right thing to do. 

 

[wykikitoon 19399]

Absolutely 

[wykikitoon 19399]

 

 

What a cock.

[Gemmill 42960]

Aye. I mean I don't even know what that's meant to be. Presumably a joke, which is a shame for everyone, but mostly Matt Law. 

[Howay 12496]

Still bitter he made such a monumental tit of himself over the Emenolo thing. We’ve got years of him crying about us to look forward to. 

[wykikitoon 19399]

23 minutes ago, Gemmill said:

Aye. I mean I don't even know what that's meant to be. Presumably a joke, which is a shame for everyone, but mostly Matt Law. 

It means that because we have a shit defence the rules don't apply