Alex 35095 Posted September 17, 2022 Share Posted September 17, 2022 There used to be a kid who went to my school who regularly rang up Night Owls. You’d think he was taking the piss but he was just genuinely thick as fuck. One time he reported seeing lights in the sky at night. The ‘Flashing Blade’ (ffs) pointed out Seaton Burn was about a mile or two from the airport. Another time he rang up about his struggle to give up the tabs. When asked how much it was costing him he replied - nowt, I smoke me Gran’s ones. Glad to hear the content has remained consistently good 👍🏻 7 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
wykikitoon 20156 Posted September 17, 2022 Share Posted September 17, 2022 12 hours ago, ohhh_yeah said: "The ambulance service said it and partner agencies had cared for 435 patients who fell ill along the lying-in-state queuing route and surrounding areas by the end of yesterday." I bet they didn't have to wait hours for an ambulance Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Alex 35095 Posted September 17, 2022 Share Posted September 17, 2022 On the subject of lads from my school, and back on subject, some of you may remember this: https://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-11216299/Royal-streaker-ran-past-Queen-Newcastle-visit-remembers-day-forgave-him.html 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Craig 6682 Posted September 17, 2022 Share Posted September 17, 2022 And here come the profiteers. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Alex 35095 Posted September 17, 2022 Share Posted September 17, 2022 Anyone willing to pay that deserves to be taken for a mug Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Andrew 4762 Posted September 17, 2022 Share Posted September 17, 2022 My sister has taken the train down to join the queue to look at a cloth covered box. Then realised the queue is so long she would miss her train home so she's given up on that. I despair. 6 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Alex 35095 Posted September 17, 2022 Share Posted September 17, 2022 At least she can flog her wristband 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Alex 35095 Posted September 17, 2022 Share Posted September 17, 2022 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Renton 21627 Posted September 17, 2022 Share Posted September 17, 2022 I love winding thr kids up. Just told them that we couldn't get to London in time so we have to do a simulated queue instead. We have to stand outside in the garden, occasionally walking a few yards in a circle, for 24 hours. Then tomorrow we can watch the BBC coffin streaming channel and cry a bit for 3 minutes, before moving on and getting warmed up My youngest one (always been exceptionally gullible) started crying at this prospect. My eldest just gave me that look which all but says "zip it, dickhead". Hey, what else are Dad's for? 10 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Toonpack 9431 Posted September 17, 2022 Share Posted September 17, 2022 Dundee Utd fans singing “Lizzies in a box” during yet another minutes silence at Hunbrox. 😂😂😂 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sonatine 11391 Posted September 17, 2022 Share Posted September 17, 2022 1 hour ago, Renton said: I love winding thr kids up. Just told them that we couldn't get to London in time so we have to do a simulated queue instead. We have to stand outside in the garden, occasionally walking a few yards in a circle, for 24 hours. Then tomorrow we can watch the BBC coffin streaming channel and cry a bit for 3 minutes, before moving on and getting warmed up My youngest one (always been exceptionally gullible) started crying at this prospect. My eldest just gave me that look which all but says "zip it, dickhead". Hey, what else are Dad's for? 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PaddockLad 17281 Posted September 17, 2022 Share Posted September 17, 2022 5 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ginolaandtonic 169 Posted September 17, 2022 Share Posted September 17, 2022 5 hours ago, Renton said: I love winding thr kids up. Just told them that we couldn't get to London in time so we have to do a simulated queue instead. We have to stand outside in the garden, occasionally walking a few yards in a circle, for 24 hours. Then tomorrow we can watch the BBC coffin streaming channel and cry a bit for 3 minutes, before moving on and getting warmed up My youngest one (always been exceptionally gullible) started crying at this prospect. My eldest just gave me that look which all but says "zip it, dickhead". Hey, what else are Dad's for? You made your kid cry and you’re boasting about it here? mmmkay Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Meenzer 15531 Posted September 17, 2022 Share Posted September 17, 2022 13 minutes ago, Ginolaandtonic said: You made your kid cry and you’re boasting about it here? mmmkay There's a cost of living crisis on, you've got to make your own entertainment 5 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Renton 21627 Posted September 17, 2022 Share Posted September 17, 2022 18 minutes ago, Ginolaandtonic said: You made your kid cry and you’re boasting about it here? mmmkay Well look at all the millions of people the queen has made cry. Perhaps you need to have a word with her. 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Meenzer 15531 Posted September 17, 2022 Share Posted September 17, 2022 4 minutes ago, Renton said: Well look at all the millions of people the queen has made cry. Perhaps you need to have a word with her. At least they're all acting perfectly normally. 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ewerk 30620 Posted September 17, 2022 Share Posted September 17, 2022 ‘We’re not ready to bid you farewell’. She was ninety fucking six, how much preparation time were you expecting? 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rayvin 5223 Posted September 17, 2022 Share Posted September 17, 2022 God, maybe we deserve a nuclear holocaust tbh. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Alex 35095 Posted September 17, 2022 Share Posted September 17, 2022 4 minutes ago, Rayvin said: God, maybe we deserve a nuclear holocaust tbh. It’s a significant minority but it’s still a minority who’ve lost their collective shit (if they ever had it). I’m not saying it’s not terribly depressing what a bunch of sycophantic fuck wits they are. But there’s no way most people feel this way, although you’d be forgiven for thinking so if you watch the news 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rayvin 5223 Posted September 17, 2022 Share Posted September 17, 2022 Was being a bit tongue in cheek there tbf anyway but yes, it is depressing to read stuff like this. Also yes, you're right that it seems like a bigger issue than it probably is. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gemmill 44900 Posted September 17, 2022 Share Posted September 17, 2022 16 minutes ago, Meenzer said: At least they're all acting perfectly normally. I didn't believe a word of that. I bet they're the shittest actor at their AmDram club. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Alex 35095 Posted September 17, 2022 Share Posted September 17, 2022 Caught a bit of the news (or the ‘queues’ as it should now be called). Someone with a stick / limp pretending to be stoic but actually complaining about the wait to get into the shorter ‘accessible’ queue despite not realising they’re part of the problem, ie the shear volume of people. Not to mention it’s their choice. You’re not evading Russian tanks on foot, you chose to go there, you dozy fucking bint 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Meenzer 15531 Posted September 17, 2022 Share Posted September 17, 2022 12 minutes ago, Alex said: It’s a significant minority but it’s still a minority who’ve lost their collective shit (if they ever had it). I’m not saying it’s not terribly depressing what a bunch of sycophantic fuck wits they are. But there’s no way most people feel this way, although you’d be forgiven for thinking so if you watch the news Aye. Thing is, I'm not fundamentally against all sentiment like that. I think "the country is unimaginable without you" and "forever in our hearts" are normal enough things to say if you're a royalist and a long-lived monarch dies. But where the fuck does the rest of it come from? As for the marmalade sandwich/Paddington spirit guide thing that seems to have taken hold, I thought this was a good read: https://artreview.com/the-queen-paddington-fantasy-image-of-britain/ 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Alex 35095 Posted September 17, 2022 Share Posted September 17, 2022 8 minutes ago, Meenzer said: Aye. Thing is, I'm not fundamentally against all sentiment like that. I think "the country is unimaginable without you" and "forever in our hearts" are normal enough things to say if you're a royalist and a long-lived monarch dies. But where the fuck does the rest of it come from? As for the marmalade sandwich/Paddington spirit guide thing that seems to have taken hold, I thought this was a good read: https://artreview.com/the-queen-paddington-fantasy-image-of-britain/ Yeah, good read. It kind of shows how little most people know or are interested in what the queen actually did. Both in a wider role in the constitution but also the day to day aspects. So they reference the only thing they can remember, the Paddington sketch. I also think a lot of people just need to be told what to think so they’ve been told the nation is heartbroken, so they think they should be Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
NJS 4386 Posted September 17, 2022 Share Posted September 17, 2022 Maybe someone should explain to the people whinging about queue jumping that they are queuing to see the biggest queue jumper in life imaginable. Might be too deep for them on second thoughts. 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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