Monkeys Fist 43552 Posted December 18, 2013 Share Posted December 18, 2013 She's an excellent cook tbh, I always dive in the kitchen and play sous chef , and, over the years, I've managed to sneak in little things like pancetta in with the sprouts, honey roast carrots etc so that Christmas Dinner is now a thing of beauty There's also a shitload of booze gets done in, in the most genteel, relentless way possible Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ayatollah Hermione 14228 Posted December 18, 2013 Share Posted December 18, 2013 GIFT TIP: A didgeridoo with a set of wheels attached to the bottom of it makes a perfect vehicle for the snake on the move! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Brock Manson 0 Posted December 18, 2013 Share Posted December 18, 2013 I'll be in Glastonbury with the lass and her family. Not sure I'll be cooking anything, but I'll offer out of courtesy. Realistically I hope to be sedated in a corner off of wine and baileys as per usual at Christmas. Going to make up some Christmas canapes - boozy dates stuffed with mascarpone & pistachio. Bit of chutney won't go amiss either so will make that too! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Christmas Tree 4920 Posted December 19, 2013 Share Posted December 19, 2013 GIFT TIP: A didgeridoo with a set of wheels attached to the bottom of it makes a perfect vehicle for the snake on the move! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Happy Face 29 Posted December 19, 2013 Share Posted December 19, 2013 Cause little one armed kids in vietnam are doing their wrapping bro. Poor urchins use their toes to reach for sellotape while holding a flap? If i worried about foreign kids I wouldn't be an iPod using, Adidas wearing, Primark* socked, uninformed diamond buying scumbag. *See they've been skinning live rabbits? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Monkeys Fist 43552 Posted December 19, 2013 Share Posted December 19, 2013 That rabbit video is pretty disturbing. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Christmas Tree 4920 Posted December 19, 2013 Share Posted December 19, 2013 Time to roll out my slimming world ferrero rocher, festive edition! Take last recipe (crushed ryvita and Nutella combined) and a dusting of icing sugar Deeeeeelicious. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tom 14021 Posted December 19, 2013 Share Posted December 19, 2013 Very NIGELLA Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gemmill 47008 Posted December 19, 2013 Share Posted December 19, 2013 I would genuinely rather have nothing than make those. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Christmas Tree 4920 Posted December 19, 2013 Share Posted December 19, 2013 I would genuinely rather have nothing than make those. Suprise, sur-fucking-prise! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ewerk 31564 Posted December 19, 2013 Share Posted December 19, 2013 I'd rather snort the icing sugar off CT's tits. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Christmas Tree 4920 Posted December 19, 2013 Share Posted December 19, 2013 I'd rather snort the icing sugar off CT's tits. Call me Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gemmill 47008 Posted December 19, 2013 Share Posted December 19, 2013 I'd rather snort the icing sugar off CT's tits. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Fish 11064 Posted December 19, 2013 Share Posted December 19, 2013 Tell you what those dog eggs don't taste half as chocolatey as they look Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dr Gloom 22503 Posted December 19, 2013 Share Posted December 19, 2013 Time to roll out my slimming world ferrero rocher, festive edition! Take last recipe (crushed ryvita and Nutella combined) and a dusting of icing sugar Deeeeeelicious. lord have mercy, stop Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Park Life 71 Posted December 19, 2013 Share Posted December 19, 2013 I reckon this is what it's like at Guantanamo. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gemmill 47008 Posted December 19, 2013 Share Posted December 19, 2013 I reckon this is what it's like at Guantanamo. Mr Obama, with these turds rolled in cell floor chippings, you're really spoiling us. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Park Life 71 Posted December 19, 2013 Share Posted December 19, 2013 (edited) Edited December 19, 2013 by Park Life Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ayatollah Hermione 14228 Posted December 19, 2013 Share Posted December 19, 2013 CT, you've got to stop zooming in. Your food ends up looking like medical mysteries. I'm half expecting Charlton Heston to be in the background of your next one, investigating your kitchen. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Park Life 71 Posted December 19, 2013 Share Posted December 19, 2013 CT, you've got to stop zooming in. Your food ends up looking like medical mysteries. I'm half expecting Charlton Heston to be in the background of your next one, investigating your kitchen. Ideally with a gun. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Toonpack 10383 Posted December 19, 2013 Share Posted December 19, 2013 (edited) I always cook the Turkey on low overnight, quick blast at higher temp first thing and it's done and out of the way before everyone's even outa bed. Never failed yet. Oh and as was said above always stuff under the skin, I also cover the whole thing with a layer of streaky bacon. Toonpack's stuffing: Portion good pork sausage meat Skinned Richmond Irish sausages (8) Cheap, but they work. Tin chopped ham and pork (blitzed) All mixed together then add: Breadcrumbs decent glug of Lemon Juice Milled Black Pepper - lots of it Mixed herbs, when you think you've added enough, add some more. Beaten egg to bind the fucker Finely chopped onion optional (I don't, as some of the family don't like it, weirdo's !!!) Mix the whole lot up and stuff away. I tend to do a double lot, half covers the bird the other half I cook like a meatloaf in a tin lined with streaky bacon, ideal for slicing and turkey/stuffing butties. Of aye, I cheat on some of the veg, sprouts especially, get the prepared bags from M&S, pierce bag microwave in 4 mins or so, drop into serving dish whallop on a bit of butter and they are bloody tasty Edited December 19, 2013 by Toonpack Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Monkeys Fist 43552 Posted December 19, 2013 Share Posted December 19, 2013 Time to roll out my slimming world ferrero rocher, festive edition! Take last recipe (crushed ryvita and Nutella combined) and a dusting of icing sugar Deeeeeelicious. Bless Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Christmas Tree 4920 Posted December 19, 2013 Share Posted December 19, 2013 CT, you've got to stop zooming in. Your food ends up looking like medical mysteries. I'm half expecting Charlton Heston to be in the background of your next one, investigating your kitchen. Better? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Christmas Tree 4920 Posted December 19, 2013 Share Posted December 19, 2013 Not a tip but... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Christmas Tree 4920 Posted December 20, 2013 Share Posted December 20, 2013 Like a lot of us I tend to watch some of the Foody Christmas shows, see something that looks great, think Id love that and then just end up with the same old stuff! Is anyone else making something they don't normally do? This year I would like to crack sprouts. Par boiled and then pan fried seems the key, either with chestnuts, pancetta or toasted almonds. I also quite like the look of this home made cranberry sauce. (Although it does seem a tad extravagant ). http://www.theguardian.com/lifeandstyle/wordofmouth/2010/dec/20/how-to-cook-perfect-christmas-dinner Juice of 1 orange, plus zest of ½ orange 210g caster sugar 450g fresh cranberries 2 tbsp port Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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