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Shit Shouts , Super Shouts

 

Any snippets of wonderment , tragedy or otherwise heard at the match .

 

Have you ever been proud of yourself with a quip ?

 

Have you ever made a complete cunt of yourself ?

 

 

There was this horrible scratty rat-faced kid who used to jump the pen-type queues at half time at back of the Sir John . Snide Nike tracksuit , his scabby bird by his side and a scowl to add to his appeal . Hartlepool accent too .

 

Some older chap perfectly politely challenged him on it one time . The lad went right up to his face and sneered "hea man - al knock y owt with a miss" . Oh my .

 

Had a seat pitchside in Sir John for a few year and one fella would always be in the same state of comatose . There were 2 things he would do that you could set your watch by .

1) He was on our row and would back from half time 15 mins late as he would minesweep the bars .

2) Every 'foul' not given he would accusationally warble "the referee's smokin dope" :lol:

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Had a seat pitchside in Sir John for a few year and one fella would always be in the same state of comatose . There were 2 things he would do that you could set your watch by .

1) He was on our row and would back from half time 15 mins late as he would minesweep the bars .

2) Every 'foul' not given he would accusationally warble "the referee's smokin dope" :lol:

 

What's his TT username?

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Minesweep? :lol:

 

An old man at the club I drink it does it. However we were playing a game which involved dropping a shot of sambuca into your pint of John Smiths. So basically the dregs were sambuca. By 5 o'clock he was falling down in the toilets rolling around in his own piss.

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Being a southerner I usually kept my mouth shut when I was at matches unless it was to join in with a song but I sat next to a really posh bloke who was also a southerner who I didn't know.

 

 

One week he chirped up (in the poshest voice you've ever heard, like something off the Fast Show) with "Come on Hugo! Get stuck in!!!" This massive bloke in front of us just turned and GLARED at him for being so southern. :lol:

 

Also he used to sing (and this is absolutely true) "We are the Geordies, the super geordies and we are mental and we are mad".

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At the Fulham game Duff got on the ball and the "One Greedy Bastard" chant went up and some wit* hilariously** quipped "History shows there' fucking loads of 'em" to the mirth of those around him.

 

 

 

 

 

*twat***

**wasn't hilarious at all

*** me :blush:

 

 

 

(I'm just trying to help your thread get back on track LTB)

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An old man at the club I drink it does it. However we were playing a game which involved dropping a shot of sambuca into your pint of John Smiths. So basically the dregs were sambuca. By 5 o'clock he was falling down in the toilets rolling around in his own piss.

 

Love owt like that ;)

 

Yes this chap at the match would work his way along the potshelf just chucking any fizzy fluid in his pot(s) .

Often had 2 or 3 pints of 'house' ale to his name by the start of the second half .

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An old man at the club I drink it does it. However we were playing a game which involved dropping a shot of sambuca into your pint of John Smiths. So basically the dregs were sambuca. By 5 o'clock he was falling down in the toilets rolling around in his own piss.

 

Jesus wept! :lol:

 

finishing off the remnants in random glasses laying around

 

Ah :lol:

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1) He was on our row and would back from half time 15 mins late as he would minesweep the bars .

2) Every 'foul' not given he would accusationally warble "the referee's smokin dope" :lol:

 

Any idea of this characters name?....there was someone doing a bit of champions league standard glass collecting just off camera as this was going off....same lad hitch hiked to Ascoli in the Anglo-Italian; and financed his drink for that liitle jaunt in no doubt the same way :lol:

 

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I was once sat near a lad who'd brought along his lass. She obviously hated football and kept moaning about how rubbish and cold it was or how she didn't know what was going on, then spending the rest of the time looking utterly bored out of her mind. Then about 85 minutes in the ball was played forward and she suddenly stood up and yelled "OFFSIDE REF FOR FUCK'S SAKE!" It sounds like nowt but it was so hilarious at the time after she'd complained the whole game and given the impression she'd rather be anywhere else, just came out of nowhere and she was right as well, it was miles offside. :lol:

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Any idea of this characters name?....there was someone doing a bit of champions league standard glass collecting just off camera as this was going off....same lad hitch hiked to Ascoli in the Anglo-Italian; and financed his drink for that liitle jaunt in no doubt the same way :lol:

 

 

Dont know his name but he was a smallish chap, bit hunched , grey hair and stubble.

Bit of a nose on him . Always wore a big anorak/puffa jacket . Rocking bit of a jaundiced look

"spoke with a local accent" :lol:

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Was the 1st game of the 01/02 season and I was a bit late getting to my seat, having an extra pint with some of the lads that sat around me, so as I'm sidestepping along giving nods and hellos to people I'd not seen for a bit, I get to my seat to see my Dad's surprised me by sorting out the seat next to mine for the season. Which in hindsight was brilliant, but at the time was baffling. See, I've always been brought up not to swear in front of my parents, so I thought I was going to have to be to be on my best behaviour, up until the ref messed up a call and my Dad leapt to his feet and shouted "Hoo ya focking cunt" in a broad Glaswegian brogue.

 

After that I thought "Well, that's carte blanche at the match now, isn't it?"

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Dont know his name but he was a smallish chap, bit hunched , grey hair and stubble.

Bit of a nose on him . Always wore a big anorak/puffa jacket . Rocking bit of a jaundiced look

"spoke with a local accent" :lol:

 

:lol:

 

naaa...not the lad am thinking of....we turned round from watching some of our lot chasing the cloggies up that side street in the vid and all we saw was this individual basically necking all their half drunk pints :lol:

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There was a bloke behind us against QPR who was moaning that "Pardew hasn't a fucking clue" when he made subs, inc Jonas off and Ameobi and Obertan on. Followed by Obertan doing more in 10 minutes than Jonas did all game, and Ameobi eventually scoring.

 

Knobhead - people moan when he doesn't change it early enough and then moan when he does make changes. I said at half time the game needed Obertan and Marveaux to (hopefully) add creativity to an otherwise lacking midfield.

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Aye people just like to poke fun at Pardew or have a go for the sake of it without ever mentioning a solution.

 

Like Lake Bells Tits enjoying a MEGALOLZAA Pardew's suggestion of Obertan keeping an offensive full back quiet - when he was given the opportunity on Saturday he did exactly that!

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Home against Spurs in the Gallowgate a few years ago, quiet period in the game, not much happening, crowd babble & chants have died down. Out of the blue an enraged middle aged bloke stands up and screams "JEWS! FUCKING JEWS!" over and over again, to the bewilderment of all around him.

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