Happy Face 29 Posted April 19, 2012 Share Posted April 19, 2012 (edited) It must be awful, being a homophobe. Having to spend all that time obsessing about what gay people might be doing with their genitals. Seeing it in your mind, over and over again, in high-definition close-up. Bravely you masturbate, to make the pictures go away, but to no avail. They're seared onto your mental membranes. Every time you close your eyes, an imaginary gay man's imaginary penis rises from the murk, bowing ominously in your direction, sensing your discomfort. Laughing. Mocking. Possibly even winking. How dare they, this man and his penis? How dare they do this to you? Obviously you can't fight the big gay penis in your head. It has no physical form, so you can't get a grip on it, much as you'd like to. You'd love to grab it and throttle it until it splutters its last. That might bring you closure. But no. So you do the next best thing. You condemn homosexuals in the real world. Maybe if they could just stop all this "being gay" business for 10 minutes, you'd get some respite from that scary headcock. It might shrivel away completely, leaving nothing behind. Except maybe a nice bit of bum. No, dammit! Forget I said that! No bum either! Of course sometimes the act of condemning homosexuals in the real world overlaps with the imaginary realm. Over the past few weeks, games company Electronic Arts has been subjected to a letter-writing campaign from idiots outraged by its decision to allow players to define their characters as gay in a Star Wars game. The Florida Family Association says, "children and teens, who never thought any way but heterosexual, are now given a choice to be lesbian, gay, bisexual or transgender" – adding that even if they chose to be straight, they would still "be forced to deal with lesbian, gay, bisexual or transgender characters chosen by other players". Personal choice and co-operation: two appalling threats to our youth. They also claim "there were no LGBT characters in any of the Star Wars movies". I don't know which wacky re-cut version of Star Wars they've been watching, but I saw the original when I was about six years old and even then I was struck by how outrageously camp C3PO is. He was a gilded John Inman in space. And what about Luke Skywalker? Apart from briefly kissing his own sister, he shows no interest in women whatsoever. The first film is a tender gay parable in which Luke falls in love with Alec Guinness and gradually "comes out" as a Jedi. The final scene oozes symbolism: having penetrated the Death Star's trench in his phallic spacecraft, he closes his eyes, submits to his true inner instinct and triumphantly blasts his X-Wing's seed into an anus-like aperture, causing an orgasmic eruption that changes his universe for ever. It's hard to see how they could make Star Wars any gayer, unless they gave the Millennium Falcon a handlebar moustache. But hang on, some of you are saying, this is a video game we're talking about. Isn't this gay content a bit shoehorned in? Sonic the Hedgehog never agonised over his sexual identity. He was too busy sprinting through a rainbow-coloured landscape leaping at rings. True, but that was in 1991 – which in "technology years" was about nine millennia ago. It's like comparing a cave painting with a surround-sound 3D movie. EA's Star Wars title in question is an MMORPG or massively multiplayer online role-playing game with more than a million subscribers: real people playing and interacting with each other in real-time, and hey, statistically, at least three of those people are going to be gay. The least you can do is let them reflect that in the characters they pick. But wait: there's even more gay content in another EA space epic, Mass Effect 3, which to the uninitiated is a bit like playing through an entire Star Trek boxset. It's bold space hokum and it's great fun – and just like Star Trek, it includes a range of potential love interests for the main character. Previous Mass Effect titles have let you play as a woman and – gasp – seduce other women: this final instalment is the first to give players the option playing a man who woos men. Play your cards right (or play your dialogue tree options right) throughout hours of gameplay and you'll be rewarded with a short, chaste love scene in which two bare-chested men kiss and cuddle in bed. Players have complained bitterly about the ending of Mass Effect 3 – not because of the potential for homosexual love, but because they found the narrative underwhelming. The game has a variety of different endings, depending on your decisions: some have moaned that none of the possible endings are happy or satisfying enough. In fact, they've moaned so much, EA has hastily released an additional ending free-of-charge, so these players can experience "further closure". I can't work out if that's depressing or sweet. On the one hand, they're spoiled little emperors with a mind-boggling sense of entitlement: it's one thing to be disappointed by the end of a story, but another to demand the author sits down and writes you a new one RIGHT NOW. You need "further closure"? What's wrong with you? But on the other hand, it's a sign that players sometimes invest so much of themselves into the characters they play, they care about them to a degree that should make any author jealous. Sneerers will doubtless leave comments about "saddoes" and "shut-ins", oblivious that by doing so, they too are playing a character in an immense MMORPG called the internet. Face it: you've even chosen a nickname and an avatar just to join in. Allowing players to identify their characters as homosexual isn't, as the anti-gay campaigners claim, a tokenistic novelty, but an unavoidable consequence of the fascinating evolution of video games. Not that there's much point explaining that to them. They don't believe in evolution either. And they wouldn't hear you anyway over the thunderous roar of dicks screaming for ever in their frightened mind's ear. http://www.guardian....-gay-video-game Edited April 19, 2012 by Happy Face Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kid Dynamite 7034 Posted April 19, 2012 Share Posted April 19, 2012 It seems to be a lot more acceptable in the UK today than decades gone by. I remember the furore around queer as folk when it was first on tv, I don't think that would be the case today. Obviously it's still out there, just as racism is, but I'd like to think the current generation is mainly indifferent to a persons sexuality Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Alex 35120 Posted April 19, 2012 Share Posted April 19, 2012 That notion it's a choice (or indeed something that can be 'cured') is a weird one. As though you can choose who or what you fancy. I'm into animals btw. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Nyff 0 Posted April 19, 2012 Share Posted April 19, 2012 As much as it has become much more accepted, I am still dumbfounded by the outdated views some people still have. Some woman in one of my lectures the other day just couldn't fathom at all how one man could fall in love with another. She actually seemed proud to call herself a homophobe and was spouting out the usual bullshit about it is wrong and it isn't natural blah blah blah. Normally with people like that there is a religious reason behind their views, but she wasn't a Christian either. Unfortunately she was impossible to argue with, and instead I ended up getting unnaturally angry. For the record, I think the above article is in response to this in the Daily Mail: ....oh wait. Just as I went to find the article I realise it has been taken down. There was a mini-facebook campaign to report it to the PCC, which appears to have worked. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LeazesMag 0 Posted April 19, 2012 Share Posted April 19, 2012 It seems to be a lot more acceptable in the UK today than decades gone by. I remember the furore around queer as folk when it was first on tv, I don't think that would be the case today. Obviously it's still out there, just as racism is, but I'd like to think the current generation is mainly indifferent to a persons sexuality it seems half the TV presenters etc are gay these days. Which promotes the acceptability of it especially to kids. People like Louie Spence, Dale Winton to name 2 are an embarrassment and should be kicked off TV. Or prefereably shot. Graham Norton is a good laugh though. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Alex 35120 Posted April 19, 2012 Share Posted April 19, 2012 Bring back Larry Grayson. Kids should view it as being acceptable btw. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BestBaNone 0 Posted April 19, 2012 Share Posted April 19, 2012 The racist is also a homophobe. Don't ban him though, it's just an opinion. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Alex 35120 Posted April 19, 2012 Share Posted April 19, 2012 Just needs an "I'm gay, you cunt" post from Baggio. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LeazesMag 0 Posted April 19, 2012 Share Posted April 19, 2012 (edited) The racist is also a homophobe. Don't ban him though, it's just an opinion. I've never voted BNP in my life and have no intention of doing so, not that I consider them to be any more "racist" than the SNP for instance. I am not a member of the KKK either. I don't consider myself to be a racist, I do however consider immigrants into the UK that have no interest in integrating to be racist. Which has nothing to do with this thread, in spite of my little joke in the above post. Don't make false accusations about other members of the forum. It's frowned on, or is it OK for you ? Edited April 19, 2012 by LeazesMag Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BestBaNone 0 Posted April 19, 2012 Share Posted April 19, 2012 Oh well as long as you haven't voted BNP Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LeazesMag 0 Posted April 19, 2012 Share Posted April 19, 2012 Oh well as long as you haven't voted BNP just making a point. Don't make accusations that aren't true, or is it different for you ? Have you kissed Mike Ashley or Dekka's arse yet ? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Alex 35120 Posted April 19, 2012 Share Posted April 19, 2012 I wonder if he came across any in the armed forces The uniforms are to die for. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Nyff 0 Posted April 19, 2012 Share Posted April 19, 2012 Oh well as long as you haven't voted BNP just making a point. Don't make accusations that aren't true, or is it different for you ? Have you kissed Mike Ashley or Dekka's arse yet ? Well, I suppose that is at least a little bit on topic... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LeazesMag 0 Posted April 19, 2012 Share Posted April 19, 2012 I wonder if he came across any in the armed forces The uniforms are to die for. is that directed at me Alex Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BestBaNone 0 Posted April 19, 2012 Share Posted April 19, 2012 They've been multiplying ever since going to the pub became a taboo imo, pansies. Few pints of John Smiths on an eve will straighten 'em out. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LeazesMag 0 Posted April 19, 2012 Share Posted April 19, 2012 Oh well as long as you haven't voted BNP just making a point. Don't make accusations that aren't true, or is it different for you ? Have you kissed Mike Ashley or Dekka's arse yet ? Well, I suppose that is at least a little bit on topic... he'll be spitting it all back out again in the not too distant future......... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ayatollah Hermione 13894 Posted April 19, 2012 Share Posted April 19, 2012 I wonder if he came across any in the armed forces The uniforms are to die for. Fnarr Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Alex 35120 Posted April 19, 2012 Share Posted April 19, 2012 All those years of crawling into trenches and polishing your weapon will take a toll on anyone's state of mind tbf. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LeazesMag 0 Posted April 19, 2012 Share Posted April 19, 2012 All those years of crawling into trenches and polishing your weapon will take a toll on anyone's state of mind tbf. like spit and polish you mean ? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Andrew 4774 Posted April 19, 2012 Share Posted April 19, 2012 Mass effect was good wasnt too keen on SW:TOR Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Anth 113 Posted April 19, 2012 Share Posted April 19, 2012 It seems to be a lot more acceptable in the UK today than decades gone by. I remember the furore around queer as folk when it was first on tv, I don't think that would be the case today. Obviously it's still out there, just as racism is, but I'd like to think the current generation is mainly indifferent to a persons sexuality it seems half the TV presenters etc are gay these days. Which promotes the acceptability of it especially to kids. People like Louie Spence, Dale Winton to name 2 are an embarrassment and should be kicked off TV. Or prefereably shot. Graham Norton is a good laugh though. Out of interest why shouldn't it be seen acceptable to Kids? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Happy Face 29 Posted April 19, 2012 Author Share Posted April 19, 2012 Love how it's the acceptbility to kids comment that received a backlash, rather than the shooting of the celebrity gays. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Christmas Tree 4729 Posted April 19, 2012 Share Posted April 19, 2012 It seems to be a lot more acceptable in the UK today than decades gone by. I remember the furore around queer as folk when it was first on tv, I don't think that would be the case today. Obviously it's still out there, just as racism is, but I'd like to think the current generation is mainly indifferent to a persons sexuality it seems half the TV presenters etc are gay these days. Which promotes the acceptability of it especially to kids. People like Louie Spence, Dale Winton to name 2 are an embarrassment and should be kicked off TV. Or prefereably shot. Graham Norton is a good laugh though. Out of interest why shouldn't it be seen acceptable to Kids? Thats an interesting question. Is it taught in school as part of sex education at a certain age? Could it lead to experimentation which otherwise may not crop up? I dont particularly know the answers to either of those however I am a great believer in kids being kids as long as possible. My seven year old did mention last night that one of the boys in class called two girls gay for hugging. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Anth 113 Posted April 19, 2012 Share Posted April 19, 2012 Love how it's the acceptbility to kids comment that received a backlash, rather than the shooting of the celebrity gays. Nah I'd quite happily shoot Dale Winton like! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Anth 113 Posted April 19, 2012 Share Posted April 19, 2012 Aye kids should be kids, but I don't think homosexuality should be seen as unacceptable. People are born with it In my opinion. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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