mackem messageboard gold

[Alex 35810]

1 hour ago, Sonatine said:

The best part is, you can pretty much guarantee that none of the above actually happened  

I believe half of the last story  

[Alex 35810]

4 minutes ago, Renton said:

 

I reckon the bottom left one may well have happened like. Probably the highlight of the SMB's life, remembering it from 15 years ago. 

The bit about the bar not having a Sunderland top on the wall certainly rings true 

[Monkeys Fist 43413]

3 minutes ago, Alex said:

The bit about the bar not having a Sunderland top on the wall certainly rings true 

 Fewm. 

[Alex 35810]

Even in their made-up stories, like the snubbing a Mag in France one, they have to explain to people who Sunderland are. The stupid fucking cunts. 

[Renton 22259]

6 minutes ago, Alex said:

Even in their made-up stories, like the snubbing a Mag in France one, they have to explain to people who Sunderland are. The stupid fucking cunts. 

 

As well as point how incredibly petty they are in their made up heads. 

[Howmanheyman 34305]

I love how their tales abroad always involve either mocking, chinning or putting a Mag in his place or all three combined. It's quite a talent they have.

[Monkeys Fist 43413]

I lived in France, Switzerland and Spain for about 10 years, didn’t meet a single mackem in the entire time. 
 

Lucky escape by the sound of it 

[Tom 14021]

Aye they can't just go away, have a nice time and come home  

[Alex 35810]

They’re too busy hitting Juve fans with plastic gladiator swords and shouting 6 in a row

Edited July 1, 2022 by Alex

[Howmanheyman 34305]

Once met a lad in Spain in 92 on holiday with mates who joined us for a couple of pints on a night out, said he was from Durham and a Newcastle fan, being young lads and on the piss we started singing NUFC songs towards the end of the night and our new 'Durham mate' sang along to them all with us with equal gusto. He then said he had to get back to wherever the fuck he was staying and said it was great crack etc, wished us well and when he was at a safe distance he pulled his shirt up and pointed to something we couldn't see and started chanting 'sunalin, sunalin, sunalin' before legging it as we made as if to start chasing him and kicking his head in for being a bizarre person but I think this encounter does lift a veil into their true psyche. We seemed to get attention without courting it, unlike, I presume he did, everyone knew where Newcastle was, we had just stayed up so weren't exactly pulling up trees but still didn't have to explain that we were 'near Sunderland'. Geordie wannabes iyam. 

[Monkeys Fist 43413]

“ Got one over on some Maggie bastids last night- spent the entire night pretending to be one of them…”

 

[Howmanheyman 34305]

3 minutes ago, Monkeys Fist said:

“ Got one over on some Maggie bastids last night- spent the entire night pretending to be one of them…”

 

I haven't thought about it for about twenty years but can you imagine the reverse scenario? I mean, why would you?

[Monkeys Fist 43413]

What’s also a bit weird is - why was he on his own? 
Either his mates had enough of his rancid patter and fucked him off , or he was on holiday, in his 20s, with his Mam and Dad, and his old man gave him some pocket money to go out so he could get amongst the Mrs. 
 

 

[ewerk 31369]

Quiff was a mackem all along?

[Howay 12496]

8 hours ago, Monkeys Fist said:

I lived in France, Switzerland and Spain for about 10 years, didn’t meet a single mackem in the entire time. 
 

Lucky escape by the sound of it 

From the definitely true stories they shared surely you met a few that pretended they couldn’t speak any English and snubbed you in some minor way? 

[Monkeys Fist 43413]

7 minutes ago, Howay said:

From the definitely true stories they shared surely you met a few that pretended they couldn’t speak any English and snubbed you in some minor way? 

Actually, now that you mention it…

 

… no. 
 

Speak whatever language they like, you can’t mask the stench of years Uncal Mick’s jism shampoos. 

[RobinRobin 11746]

10 hours ago, ewerk said:

Quiff was a mackem all along?

Would explain a great deal

[thebrokendoll 9559]

in their 1400 post, week old, sixth edition since october sportswashing thread there appears to be two new contributors.

sweep, a supposed newcastle supporter who agrees with everything they say or even manages to surpass their vitriol for our club.

I mean, I can't believe for one second even if you were a bastion of human rights, the last place on earth you'd choose to go and discuss it would be the football messageboard of a shithole town renowned for its bigotry and contempt for anyone born outside their midden, particularly foreigners.

very suspect.

the re-emergence of zig81, the angriest man on the internet who flounced with his boyfriend reiver to not606 at time of the great dell/penelope cruz debacle. think the insane cunt used to have the rifle infantry cap badge as his avatar and claimed his anger issues were a result of ptsd. already offering to meet up with folk in the bird in washington for a dust up.

fucking hilarious, to quote the great lulu, it's only a matter of time before his heart goes boom bang a BANG. 

[Alex 35810]

If you think it’s bad now, wait until the season starts 

[Howay 12496]

 

Makes you think. 

[Ayatollah Hermione 14186]

Only in Sunderland would having “BOT” in your name be considered a genuine bad thing. No puffs in that village, no sir

[NJS 4442]

I bet the thick cunt was so proud when they thought of that clever word play of interjecting trade centre into that sentence as well - probably the brightest thought they've ever had. 

[Tom 14021]

Their NUFC thread is so funny  

[Alex 35810]

Not sure why they’d bring up the World Trade Centre to have a pop given their deep concern re: the fate of Bin Laden’s best mate 

[Howay 12496]

2 hours ago, Alex said:

Not sure why they’d bring up the World Trade Centre to have a pop given their deep concern re: the fate of Bin Laden’s best mate 

It’s yet another sign that they also don’t care about the actual discussion/issues around our ownership too. There is extremely strong evidence that the Saudis funded those organizations but MBS has worked to move away from that, he cut funding and turned his back to look more west - there’s absolutely no doubt he’s a total piece of shit but trying to shoehorn something like that in again just shows their lack of interest in the actual situation. They can keep up this faux outrage but the fact is they’re using horrific events where people died to have pops at fans of a rival team, trivializing the event imo and not even getting the facts straight. Trying to take the high road but not even being bothered enough to pick the right issues to raise when there’s a fucking mountain of easy material to pick from. Thick paedophile supporting cunts. 

 

If Portsmouth had our owners they’d not care, it’s that simple and transparent. They’ll keep trivializing terrorist attacks and believing that Ross Stewart would get the better of up and coming world beaters, it’s just what they do. “Classy”.