Jump to content

mackem messageboard gold


Gene_Clark
 Share

Recommended Posts

This has to be a joke :lol:

 

John Foster is a jaded Sunderland supporter who unwittingly makes a deal with a mysterious well-dressed man that he befriends on a night out. Soon after, he finds himself in an exciting new relationship with the beautiful and previously unobtainable Aimee and successful business partnership with nightclub promoter Gary. John then discovers he has sold his soul to the devil so Sunderland can beat Newcastle six times in a row. What he doesn't realise is that he must experience each victory through the eyes of six very different fans... - Ryan has lost £200 and subsequently missed out on a Newcastle away ticket, but his worst fear is his dad finding out. - Katie has just said goodbye to the most important person in her life, and this will be the first time she sits next to his empty seat at the Stadium of Light. - Samuel is a posh boy trying to prove to his mummy he is sensible enough to go to the cup final. But can Sam hack the sesh at Newcastle away? - Greg works for a marketing company, but when he has to work door-to-door in Newcastle on derby day, he questions whether he has found his calling in life. - Kasey is a frustrated housewife and doting mother whose family doesn't appreciate her, until she plots a diabolical plan to ruin each of their derby days. - Peter is a Newcastle fan who has seen his team lose five derbies in a row. He hates Mackems already, but defeat number six may just push him over the edge. This fiction-based-on-fact black comedy tells the tale of John Foster and his struggle to find his place in the underworld of Sunderland, while Sunderland AFC struggle to retain their place in the Premier League. In order to become a winner, John must first battle his own demons; literally and figuratively. Nightclubs. Football. Sex. Drugs. Flossys.

 

wtf :lol:

Link to comment
Share on other sites

i particularly enjoyed 

 

 

 

 

:lol:

 

And how he 'discovers' that he sold his soul to the devil. Next time you put your soul up on ebay and then change your mind remember to take the ad down!!

Link to comment
Share on other sites

If we'd finished above them last season and they'd stopped up they'd have probably done more this summer. The jubilation that ensued at us going down caused their entire club to be lured into a false sense of security, where the manager that survived by 1 point is a messiah and they were creating threads claiming that some kind of special revolution was happening at their club :lol: I genuinely believe our relegation has contributed to their current state of affairs.

I think there's something to that. Our relegation made them view last season as a success.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

This has to be a joke :lol:

 

John Foster is a jaded Sunderland supporter who unwittingly makes a deal with a mysterious well-dressed man that he befriends on a night out. Soon after, he finds himself in an exciting new relationship with the beautiful and previously unobtainable Aimee and successful business partnership with nightclub promoter Gary. John then discovers he has sold his soul to the devil so Sunderland can beat Newcastle six times in a row. What he doesn't realise is that he must experience each victory through the eyes of six very different fans... - Ryan has lost £200 and subsequently missed out on a Newcastle away ticket, but his worst fear is his dad finding out. - Katie has just said goodbye to the most important person in her life, and this will be the first time she sits next to his empty seat at the Stadium of Light. - Samuel is a posh boy trying to prove to his mummy he is sensible enough to go to the cup final. But can Sam hack the sesh at Newcastle away? - Greg works for a marketing company, but when he has to work door-to-door in Newcastle on derby day, he questions whether he has found his calling in life. - Kasey is a frustrated housewife and doting mother whose family doesn't appreciate her, until she plots a diabolical plan to ruin each of their derby days. - Peter is a Newcastle fan who has seen his team lose five derbies in a row. He hates Mackems already, but defeat number six may just push him over the edge. This fiction-based-on-fact black comedy tells the tale of John Foster and his struggle to find his place in the underworld of Sunderland, while Sunderland AFC struggle to retain their place in the Premier League. In order to become a winner, John must first battle his own demons; literally and figuratively. Nightclubs. Football. Sex. Drugs. Flossys.

If that had just been some shite someone on their forum had put on for a laugh it would have been ok (not particularly witty, I'm sure it could be done a lot better) but if someone has actually written it as a book, it defies belief.  It's even worse if someone has published it.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

An interview with the author. :lol:

 

 

If you could choose three local celebrities to go out on your promo tour with you, who would they be?

 
We're talking Sunderland here, so first of all it's got to be Steve Cram. I think that's almost a prerequisite. I dunno what I'd have craic with him about, mind, probably running. He could tell me what the furthest he's ever run is, and I could pretend to be interested. The second person would have to be Wearside Jack, the Yorkshire Ripper hoax-caller bloke, as I reckon if we got him pissed we could convince him to do anything. He'd be a canny lad to have on tour but I imagine we'd end up getting sick of him quite soon. Maybe we could just leave him at a service station somewhere, like we do to misbehaving kids on ALS coaches. Thirdly, moving out of Sunderland a little bit, I'd have to choose Robson Green. My mam reckons that he once stood on her foot coming out of Woolworths in Chester Le Street, and didn't apologise, so I'd love to knock that c**t out. Plus he's a mag.
Link to comment
Share on other sites

:lol: :lol: Genuinely hope that's a pisstake because if it's in anyway serious or it's a mackem trying to be funny it's pathetic. It's also fucking hilarious when you think those two are probably two of the most notable mackems (even then Cram is from Jarrow which is 50/50 anyway), what a useless place.

Edited by Howay
Link to comment
Share on other sites

jesus christ, this isn't a wind up then? 

 

the lead line to one of the questions 

 

 

 

If this book becomes really, really popular and makes you really, really famous...

 

:spit:

Link to comment
Share on other sites

I've said it before on this board; it's pure genius and I was I thought about it myself.

The unwashed are going to snap this book up and stuff it into the stockings of all their rugrats and husbands this Christmas.   Almost every copy will go unread and those that can read and realise it's shit won't speak out because it's "6 in a row!".  Easy money for the author.

Edited by MiddleAgeCool
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now
 Share

×
×
  • Create New...

Important Information

We have placed cookies on your device to help make this website better. You can adjust your cookie settings, otherwise we'll assume you're okay to continue.