mackem messageboard gold

[Dazzler 11892]

5 minutes ago, Monkeys Fist said:

The Normans weren’t even French either. 

Aye they were Norse/Viking raiders weren't they? That's where the name actually comes from

[Alex 36748]

5 minutes ago, Dazzler said:

Aye they were Norse/Viking raiders weren't they? That's where the name actually comes from

And every single English monarch since is directly descended from them anyway iirc 

 

[NJS 4568]

Directly is pushing it in a couple of wobbly cases. 

[Alex 36748]

1 minute ago, NJS said:

Directly is pushing it in a couple of wobbly cases. 

Officially then  

[Howmanheyman 36669]

1 hour ago, Alex said:

I find it grimly fascinating that people can be obsessed with British colonial and military history whilst knowing so little about it. It’s the same people who think paying for a package holiday should give you free rein in a foreign country 

 

 

'Had to conka half the globe, marra. How else was wa gan to fom ahl thesyse forrin futbal clubs?'

 

[Alex 36748]

They’re not going to know what to think if they hear about the entirely fictitious support the then nonexistent Sunderland gave to the Scots in the English civil war. 

[Howmanheyman 36669]

"Wa formed Athletic Bilbo!"

 

 

 

Athletic Bilbao:

 

 

 

"The mysterious cabal of Tyneside businessmen said they'd add 'Sunderland' to 'Newcastle international airport if wa helped paya for it."

 

 

One of the cabal:

 

 

 

"Ahv heard KLD has made inquiries about Potter and that bloke from France."

 

 

Potter:

 

 

 

"In tha English civil war wa fought against the mags and that's why wa get fuck ahl compared to them."

 

 

 

 

Legitimate historian:

 

 

 

"The Mags would never have bent ova backwards and gave in because they were skint like us and neyded the money."

 

 

NUFC board member:

[Alex 36748]

 

[aimaad22 4704]

Athletic Bilbo  

 

[OTF 8428]

Athletic Bilbo

 

Non-Athletic Bilbo

[Kid Dynamite 7645]

*Ponteland airport

[Renton 23734]

Mackem report. 

So, from what I can tell, they deleted our match thread when we scored, reinstated it once Blackburn scored, and that thread was 30 pages long at the time of writing. 

 

I looked at the last page, and this amused me. If we get a home draw (at last) , it's due to Saudi bribery apparently. Our Arab overlords are absolute masterminds. 

 

[Renton 23734]

This is proper paranoia. The ref fixed which end the pens were taken by making the toss best out of three! Of course in reality there is one toss for the end and another to choose who goes first. But what I can't get my head around, is why this brain donor believes the Blackburn captain, after having won the first toss, agrees to best of three? 🙃

 

[aimaad22 4704]

Ok let me have a go at one of these

 

 

 

 

 

"Habibi FA quarterfinal fe St James Bark!!"

 

 

 

" That'll be 20,000 quid, cash or card?"

 

 

 

 

 

 NUFC HQ

[Howay 12496]

Unbelievable that he’s not mentioned the best footballing side in England! 

[Gemmill 50042]

He won't want to mak it too obvious marra, but this looks like a job application to me.

[Renton 23734]

Klopp "Can I see your golf course dossier before I make my mind up?" 

Frat kid "Erm, we have some crazy golf at Seaham.... which we could renovate with money from the crisps whip round. Do you like skiing my marrow? We have the biggest dry ski slope in, erm, Sunderland, at Silky". 

[ewerk 33242]

1 hour ago, Renton said:

Klopp "Can I see your golf course dossier before I make my mind up?" 

Frat kid "Erm, we have some crazy golf at Seaham.... which we could renovate with money from the crisps whip round. Do you like skiing my marrow? We have the biggest dry ski slope in, erm, Sunderland, at Silky". 

 

'Silk Cut? Where do I sign?'

[Dazzler 11892]

4 hours ago, Renton said:

Klopp "Can I see your golf course dossier before I make my mind up?" 

Frat kid "Erm, we have some crazy golf at Seaham.... which we could renovate with money from the crisps whip round. Do you like skiing my marrow? We have the biggest dry ski slope in, erm, Sunderland, at Silky". 

 

Klopp 10 minutes into the welcome party at the new monkey:

[Howay 12496]

On 25/02/2024 at 07:31, Howmanheyman said:

 

 

 

 

 

🎶

Come sit down eeya, marra

I'll tell you 'bout the Mags at work

They dinna want Howe any longer

They want that José bloke.

 

Many tales I have to tell you

Many fantasies relived

Sometimes they are tragic

Sometimes the green eye shows

But always.... A happy.....six in a.... roooow.

🎵

 

  

 

The best part of that screenshot is they’re discussing us being involved in a competition they’ve never ever been involved in, have been hammered by us this season but will still be absolutely convinced they’re a better and bigger club with a brighter future  then to cap it all off they’ll be adamant we’re the deluded ones. 

[Dazzler 11892]

3 minutes ago, Howay said:

  

 

The best part of that screenshot is they’re discussing us being involved in a competition they’ve never ever been involved in, have been hammered by us this season but will still be absolutely convinced they’re a better and bigger club with a brighter future  then to cap it all off they’ll be adamant we’re the deluded ones. 

I think "visiting owl" was largely on the button to be honest, it's the tragic cunt replying to them that is mental/lying.

 

I do think a portion of our overweight, topless ticket holding wall punchers would have probably started to turn had we gone out last night. It would have been a minority though. I loved the commentator trying to make the same point last night saying he'd spoken to fans before the game that had said lose this and they would turn - only to be completely drowned out by chants of "Eddie Howe's black and white army"

[Renton 23734]

Ahh fuck. Just learnt the mackems would have beat us in the third round had it not been for the Frat kid owner who ordered them to stand down. It does beg the question, why would you support the players of a team that obeyed this order, cunningly disguising themselves as being dog shit instead of playing their usual Brazil 70 selves? I expect a lot more bewwwws at the SoL next match following this revelation. 

 

[Howmanheyman 36669]

 

 

 

[Dazzler 11892]

17 hours ago, Renton said:

Ahh fuck. Just learnt the mackems would have beat us in the third round had it not been for the Frat kid owner who ordered them to stand down. It does beg the question, why would you support the players of a team that obeyed this order, cunningly disguising themselves as being dog shit instead of playing their usual Brazil 70 selves? I expect a lot more bewwwws at the SoL next match following this revelation. 

 

I fucking it! I knew there had to be a reason we won that game that couldn't be explained by "a premier league team with a smidgen of remaining confidence (at the time), and quality players overpowers middling championship team with zero premier league quality, whilst never getting out of second gear".

 

Fucking Saudis man, ruining the game - just like they ruin the carpets in embassies - bastards.

[Alex 36748]

In the last two seasons they’ve played 3 competitive matches against PL opposition. They’ve drawn one away and lost two at home. Maybe they just aren’t as good as the teams a division above

#MakesYouThink 

Although Roker Mackem should maybe ease off on the thinking for a bit