Ayatollah Hermione 13873 Posted September 15 Share Posted September 15 Hope we did manage to fix the match with a brown envelope or two. Quite how you could fix it so we score a rocket from 25 yards, I don’t know but worth a go, I suppose 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Toonpack 9432 Posted September 16 Share Posted September 16 9 hours ago, Ayatollah Hermione said: Hope we did manage to fix the match with a brown envelope or two. Quite how you could fix it so we score a rocket from 25 yards, I don’t know but worth a go, I suppose Magnets (or magnates to some) 6 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Renton 21627 Posted September 16 Share Posted September 16 9 hours ago, Ayatollah Hermione said: Hope we did manage to fix the match with a brown envelope or two. Quite how you could fix it so we score a rocket from 25 yards, I don’t know but worth a go, I suppose Aha, youse let it slip there marra. The sawdies put rockets in the ball and guided it in with remote control. 7 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
thebrokendoll 9244 Posted September 17 Share Posted September 17 seven mackems on holiday and instead of one of them singlehandedly windmilling the living fuck out of the entire barcode family they all move to a different part of the beach? something not quite right here.... 5 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
thebrokendoll 9244 Posted September 17 Share Posted September 17 it's inconceivable that had this really happened that the young mackem kiddie in the sunderland training top wouldn't have leapt up like a ninja, and laid waste to the two pitbulls with some nifty SAS like self defence moves. I don't believe a word of it. 5 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Howmanheyman 33246 Posted September 17 Share Posted September 17 (edited) Their neverending tales of bumping into mags everywhere and anywhere in the world where the MLFs present are all fine, respectable pillars of society but the mags are brash, big mouthed scruffs all wearing football tops who are usually publicly humiliated by the debonair descendants of founders of global football clubs always tickles me. Keep it going, marras, lovely to see. Edited September 17 by Howmanheyman 5 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dazzler 9752 Posted September 17 Share Posted September 17 (edited) 34 minutes ago, Howmanheyman said: Their neverending tales of bumping into mags everywhere and anywhere in the world where the MLFs present are all fine, respectable pillars of society but the mags are brash, big mouthed scruffs all wearing football tops who are usually publicly humiliated by the debonair descendants of founders of global football clubs ways tickles me. Keep it going, marras, lovely to see. I love the escalation as they all have to one up each other. "I was a snobbish cunt on a shit beaych holiday in Wales, marra." "Woh yeh? Well aah was a bellend to a mag in Ponteyland Airport." "That's nowt, marra. Aah shouted obscenities at a toddler in a full barcode kit in Marmaris." "Buckle up lads, aah've got yeeyz aah'll beyt. Aah uppercutted Feylix Baumgartner when he landed after his stratosphere base jump because aah read summit on 4chan about him liking Sheyrer as a kid. Not that aah have a problem with big Al marra, eez one of the good ones." Edited September 17 by Dazzler 5 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Alex 35095 Posted September 17 Share Posted September 17 17 minutes ago, Dazzler said: I love the escalation as they all have to one up each other. "I was a snobbish cunt on a shit beaych holiday in Wales, marra." "Woh yeh? Well aah was bellend to a mag in Ponteyland Airport." "That's nowt, marra. Aah shouted obscenities at a toddler in a full barcode kit in Marmaris." "Buckle up lads, aah've got yeeyz aah'll beyt. Aah uppercutted Feylix Baumgartner when he landed after his stratosphere base jump because aah read summit on 4chan about him liking Sheyrer as a kid. Not that aah have a problem with big Al marra, eez one of the good ones." Last one contains far too much detail to be on RTG 4 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Howmanheyman 33246 Posted September 17 Share Posted September 17 Scouse version of Mackemory. 5 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Monkeys Fist 42459 Posted September 17 Share Posted September 17 28 minutes ago, Howmanheyman said: Scouse version of Mackemory. It’s Tough Guy Mick! I wonder if he’s related to the Mackem Micks, Uncal, Little, and Basic? 5 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Renton 21627 Posted September 17 Share Posted September 17 4 hours ago, Dazzler said: I love the escalation as they all have to one up each other. "I was a snobbish cunt on a shit beaych holiday in Wales, marra." "Woh yeh? Well aah was a bellend to a mag in Ponteyland Airport." "That's nowt, marra. Aah shouted obscenities at a toddler in a full barcode kit in Marmaris." "Buckle up lads, aah've got yeeyz aah'll beyt. Aah uppercutted Feylix Baumgartner when he landed after his stratosphere base jump because aah read summit on 4chan about him liking Sheyrer as a kid. Not that aah have a problem with big Al marra, eez one of the good ones." This is it, the silly escalation. "That's nowt. A was walkin down Rurker beaych and a sees 10 thousandz of the curnts all wearin gravey stayained sawdi tops, including the dogs. So ah windmilled the lot of the scruffy curnts, arms, legs and heads flyin everywhere. Well, ahh looked at one of them anyways, and he didn't say nowt back. FTM". 7 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dazzler 9752 Posted September 17 Share Posted September 17 (edited) 4 hours ago, Renton said: This is it, the silly escalation. "That's nowt. A was walkin down Rurker beaych and a sees 10 thousandz of the curnts all wearin gravey stayained sawdi tops, including the dogs. So ah windmilled the lot of the scruffy curnts, arms, legs and heads flyin everywhere. Well, ahh looked at one of them anyways, and he didn't say nowt back. FTM". “Aah member this one time I was at the hospital coz ower lass was having a babbey an this mag was a bed ower with his tewn top on feydin his newborn (alsoah in eeyz bar code onesey) Anyways, aah hockled in his fayace and said tak that yi jawdey cunt. Never said a word. His dad chinned ez tho.” Edited September 17 by Dazzler 8 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Howmanheyman 33246 Posted September 17 Share Posted September 17 22 minutes ago, Dazzler said: “Aah member this one time I was at the hospital coz ower lass was having a babbey an this mag was a bed ower with his tewn top on feydin his newborn (alsoah in eeyz bar code onesey) Anyways, aah hockled in this fayace and said tak that yi jawdey cunt. Never said a word. His dad chinned ez tho.” Ah waz in sunalin general as our lass had just dropped another bairn, (she said it was definitely mine, like), anyways, the head nuss pulls me over to one side and sez, 'eea, marra, ah dinna knaaz how to tell ya but thuz beyn a mix up of the babies. The three here got mixed up, there's a black asylum seykaz bairn, a Mags bairn and a MLF's bairn.' Ah just took the darkey bairn and when the nuss looked at iz ah sez, 'Ah canna tak a chance, marra'. The rest of the ward had gathered by now and all applauded my logic to a man. FTM. 10 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dazzler 9752 Posted September 17 Share Posted September 17 3 hours ago, Howmanheyman said: Ah waz in sunalin general as our lass had just dropped another bairn, (she said it was definitely mine, like), anyways, the head nuss pulls me over to one side and sez, 'eea, marra, ah dinna knaaz how to tell ya but thuz beyn a mix up of the babies. The three here got mixed up, there's a black asylum seykaz bairn, a Mags bairn and a MLF's bairn.' Ah just took the darkey bairn and when the nuss looked at iz ah sez, 'Ah canna tak a chance, marra'. The rest of the ward had gathered by now and all applauded my logic to a man. FTM. There aah was crawling out of the plane wreckage in a feeld in Pennsylvania around September 2001, ahm not sheweh of the day but it might have beyn the 11th. Anyways, there was this Saudi fella on the plane in his mag shirt, coz tha gay bashers have fancied the scum for over 20 years. Eez giving it big licks with a screwdriver tacking shots at the cockpit door and that when aah gets up, walk cleyn over tiv em and hewk em cleyn on the jaw. Aah’ll tell ya what eez alla wasn’t hew Akbar that day. Anyways, to cut a long storey longer, the pilot gets on the tannoy and blasts a belta rendition of he shags wee he wants, oh Adam Johnson ee shags wee he wants. Accidentally knocks the autopilot off and nosedives us into a feeld. Everyone else was too busey patting iz on the back and saying nice things about Quinney and Peeteh Reeyd coz wa massive in middle America. Obviously, aah was the only survivor and aah dinnit like talking about it because as a fan of massive lads am peweh humble. 9 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tdansmith 3259 Posted September 17 Share Posted September 17 🤣 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ayatollah Hermione 13873 Posted September 17 Share Posted September 17 Couldn’t be any worse than the family of thick mackem cunts I was sat near on this transfer to the hotel who, as we passed through a police checkpoint, started shouting “El Police-o!” at the top of his voice and laughing out loud. Wouldn’t have grated too much but how fucking thick do you have to be to not know it’s “Policia”? Then it dawned on me that he almost certainly didn’t know they speak Spanish over in Mexico 7 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dazzler 9752 Posted September 18 Share Posted September 18 7 hours ago, Ayatollah Hermione said: Couldn’t be any worse than the family of thick mackem cunts I was sat near on this transfer to the hotel who, as we passed through a police checkpoint, started shouting “El Police-o!” at the top of his voice and laughing out loud. Wouldn’t have grated too much but how fucking thick do you have to be to not know it’s “Policia”? Then it dawned on me that he almost certainly didn’t know they speak Spanish over in Mexico El-po-Lee-so-a for anyone wondering how that would sound. 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Howmanheyman 33246 Posted September 18 Share Posted September 18 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dazzler 9752 Posted September 18 Share Posted September 18 "Clearly in a different league to us albeit lower" They do know how the footballing pyramid works, don't they? Also they don't get to pass judgement on horse assaults anymore. That ship sailed very recently. 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Monkeys Fist 42459 Posted September 18 Share Posted September 18 37 minutes ago, Howmanheyman said: A family Trattoria Sunlin’ when Papa Berb M was in charge Sunlin’ when the Pocket Money Kid took over 5 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Alex 35095 Posted September 18 Share Posted September 18 39 minutes ago, Howmanheyman said: He almost got there. He just needed to make them a kebab shop that does cheesy chips 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Alex 35095 Posted September 18 Share Posted September 18 18 minutes ago, Dazzler said: "Clearly in a different league to us albeit lower" They do know how the footballing pyramid works, don't they? Also they don't get to pass judgement on horse assaults anymore. That ship sailed very recently. On the river where they want to stop the boats… 1 1 13 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ayatollah Hermione 13873 Posted September 18 Share Posted September 18 I see they’re doing alright atm. If we win on Saturday and they lose, let’s see how the mood is on RTG 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
thebrokendoll 9244 Posted September 19 Share Posted September 19 what an absolute hoot this cunt is.... 1 2 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Alex 35095 Posted September 19 Share Posted September 19 Driving a car they’ve stolen whilst pissed before dumping it is really something to be proud of like. 5 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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