People who take 5-a-side way to seriously!

[ajax_andy 0]

Played in my usual tuesday night league match up at north shields last night and came across a team of absolute wankers!

 

They were rubbish and we pretty much pissed all over them, and they couldn't handle it... there was this massive talll big fat ginger bloke who ran up to this young skinny lad we had playing for us and just elbowed him in the back when the ref wasn't looking... he then did the same to one of our other players in the chest about 5 mins later... the ref as per usual did nothing!

 

After we went about 15-2 up the game just descended in to a farce, with them not even trying to tackle for the ball and just trying to snap your legs, then kicking off big style if you tackled them claiming you'd roughed them up?!!

 

This big fat ginger tosser then ran up to me when the ref wasn't looking and punched me in the back... not once, not twice but 3 times! I kicked off and the ref was having none of it saying it was "handbags". 2 minutes later this fat twat and his mate came in on me from either side, no intention of trying to get the ball, just to snap my leg. I luckily just about got out of the way, but lost me rag and spun round and kicked one of them really fucking hard... I got sent off!

 

Its ridiculous how some people approach a game of 5-a-side... ITS A GAME OF AMATEUR FOOTBALL FFS!

 

Anyone have any idea if i'll get a ban for being sent off? I wont be happy if I do as the ref should of had more control of the match and prevented it getting to that stage!

[McFaul 35]

I've never been a dirty player, ever. The only time I have, have been revenge missions. This old cunt (smoggeordie will remember), wound me up in a previous game we played against them, he was SUCH a mug, and he shouldn't have got to me, but I told all the lads am ganna dee a Begbie in the first second of the game against him, I did and I got sent off. Lot of politics in 5 a side leagues, but I've never been dirty.

 

Am worse with me own team than I am with the oppo, calmed down a lot last few years though, but had loads of fall outs with mates for bollocking them for being pish, I just like winning.

 

The cunts you mention it's funny how they never do it against lads who are as big or bigger than them, seen types like that all me life.

[ajax_andy 0]

I've never been a dirty player, ever. The only time I have, have been revenge missions. This old cunt (smoggeordie will remember), wound me up in a previous game we played against them, he was SUCH a mug, and he shouldn't have got to me, but I told all the lads am ganna dee a Begbie in the first second of the game against him, I did and I got sent off. Lot of politics in 5 a side leagues, but I've never been dirty.

 

Am worse with me own team than I am with the oppo, calmed down a lot last few years though, but had loads of fall outs with mates for bollocking them for being pish, I just like winning.

 

The cunts you mention it's funny how they never do it against lads who are as big or bigger than them, seen types like that all me life.

 

 

Haha aye I'm the same with team mates sometimes, but its just that I expect everyone to put 100% in and if they dont I get annoyed.

 

I've never been a dirty player either... i'm 31 and thats my 1st ever sending off, i've only ever even been booked once before and that wasn't for anything dirty, I was in goal as used to be a keeper, someone took it round me, I clipped em and got booked for it.

 

The worst part about this big fat lad was that he'd do it when the ref wasn't looking, then deny he'd done it! After he done the young lad in the back I went up to him at half time, tried to be calm and just said "come on its just a game keep the elbows out of it", and he was kicking off saying he'd not done owt. Total fuckin coward! If you are cuntish enough to do it, then why deny you'd done it later?

[Howmanheyman 33282]

This used to piss me off years ago when I was about 16. Played a few times in the old outdoor 5-a-side league at the Wallsend Sports Centre and this type of shite happened now and then. I was too skillful to be into hacking, to be honest. I remember watching a milk cup game in N Ireland when I was about 17 (a tournament for U-16's which we won when Clarky, Watson etc were at the club) and I remember Liverpool were playing some boys club up from Dublin, a Liverpool player got in a run at goal and was pulling the shirt of the Irish kid who was overhauling him. He then gave a shove which made the kid lose his balance and had a free run where he scored. It was done so sly that the ref hadn't a clue and I just couldn't imagine seeing a youngster cheat like that as it would never have crossed my mind, I often wonder if Heighway coached it into him. Seen the same kid a year or so later break into Liverpools side and recognised his face.

[ajax_andy 0]

This used to piss me off years ago when I was about 16. Played a few times in the old outdoor 5-a-side league at the Wallsend Sports Centre and this type of shite happened now and then. I was too skillful to be into hacking, to be honest. I remember watching a milk cup game in N Ireland when I was about 17 (a tournament for U-16's which we won when Clarky, Watson etc were at the club) and I remember Liverpool were playing some boys club up from Dublin, a Liverpool player got in a run at goal and was pulling the shirt of the Irish kid who was overhauling him. He then gave a shove which made the kid lose his balance and had a free run where he scored. It was done so sly that the ref hadn't a clue and I just couldn't imagine seeing a youngster cheat like that as it would never have crossed my mind, I often wonder if Heighway coached it into him. Seen the same kid a year or so later break into Liverpools side and recognised his face.

 

 

The thing is (and I dont agree with cheating) that at least that match was important, and trying to get an edge, just any edge is encouraged in their schooling.

 

What I cant stand is thuggish behaviour in a 5-a-side league... its just a match with no meaning what so ever to anything.

[Howmanheyman 33282]

I was also talking about the hardman tactics of grown blokes to young'uns. One of wor lot was a bit of a radge unknown to the bloke in his 30's who tried it on with him during the match, the lad on wor side just told him after the game and right enough as we left the pitch he hit the cunt quicker and harder than the bully was expecting. It only lasted a couple of minutes but the older bloke took a hiding. Most times though it doesn't work out this way for the kids.

[Barney 0]

This used to piss me off years ago when I was about 16. Played a few times in the old outdoor 5-a-side league at the Wallsend Sports Centre and this type of shite happened now and then. I was too skillful to be into hacking, to be honest. I remember watching a milk cup game in N Ireland when I was about 17 (a tournament for U-16's which we won when Clarky, Watson etc were at the club) and I remember Liverpool were playing some boys club up from Dublin, a Liverpool player got in a run at goal and was pulling the shirt of the Irish kid who was overhauling him. He then gave a shove which made the kid lose his balance and had a free run where he scored. It was done so sly that the ref hadn't a clue and I just couldn't imagine seeing a youngster cheat like that as it would never have crossed my mind, I often wonder if Heighway coached it into him. Seen the same kid a year or so later break into Liverpools side and recognised his face.

 

 

The thing is (and I dont agree with cheating) that at least that match was important, and trying to get an edge, just any edge is encouraged in their schooling.

 

What I cant stand is thuggish behaviour in a 5-a-side league... its just a match with no meaning what so ever to anything.

 

I saw journo Jacob Steinberg on twitter a while back saying his 5 a side team were in a final. The opposition were up by one with a minute or so left, their keeper grabbed the only football and booted it as far out of the pitches as he could. Sportsmanship!

[ajax_andy 0]

This used to piss me off years ago when I was about 16. Played a few times in the old outdoor 5-a-side league at the Wallsend Sports Centre and this type of shite happened now and then. I was too skillful to be into hacking, to be honest. I remember watching a milk cup game in N Ireland when I was about 17 (a tournament for U-16's which we won when Clarky, Watson etc were at the club) and I remember Liverpool were playing some boys club up from Dublin, a Liverpool player got in a run at goal and was pulling the shirt of the Irish kid who was overhauling him. He then gave a shove which made the kid lose his balance and had a free run where he scored. It was done so sly that the ref hadn't a clue and I just couldn't imagine seeing a youngster cheat like that as it would never have crossed my mind, I often wonder if Heighway coached it into him. Seen the same kid a year or so later break into Liverpools side and recognised his face.

 

 

The thing is (and I dont agree with cheating) that at least that match was important, and trying to get an edge, just any edge is encouraged in their schooling.

 

What I cant stand is thuggish behaviour in a 5-a-side league... its just a match with no meaning what so ever to anything.

 

I saw journo Jacob Steinberg on twitter a while back saying his 5 a side team were in a final. The opposition were up by one with a minute or so left, their keeper grabbed the only football and booted it as far out of the pitches as he could. Sportsmanship!

 

 

Thats proper shady tactics that!

 

I'd rather lose putting up a good fight than cheat to win!

[ajax_andy 0]

I was also talking about the hardman tactics of grown blokes to young'uns. One of wor lot was a bit of a radge unknown to the bloke in his 30's who tried it on with him during the match, the lad on wor side just told him after the game and right enough as we left the pitch he hit the cunt quicker and harder than the bully was expecting. It only lasted a couple of minutes but the older bloke took a hiding. Most times though it doesn't work out this way for the kids.

 

 

Haha aye glad he got what he deserved.... hopefully it made him think twice about doing it in future!

 

Thats the thing, I dont think they expect anyone to stand up to them. I always end up getting involved when its like that as everyone else on my team is a soft shite lol, and I feel its my responsibilty to stand up to them and let them know they aint gonna get away with it. This despite me being a 10 stone weakling lol!

[McFaul 35]

This kid Noonie who used to play for me, about 5 years older than me biggest babbie you ever saw in your life, 6ft4 18st, the definition of attitude, he used to do that Barney if a decision went against him, he'd pick the ball up and drop kick it miles off the pitch. Was funny when we were young, but it's amazing how your perception of people changes when you get older. What a mug.

[Barney 0]

This kid Noonie who used to play for me, about 5 years older than me biggest babbie you ever saw in your life, 6ft4 18st, the definition of attitude, he used to do that Barney if a decision went against him, he'd pick the ball up and drop kick it miles off the pitch. Was funny when we were young, but it's amazing how your perception of people changes when you get older. What a mug.

 

 

ridiculous!

 

Our centre back and manager had a huge row last week. we pissed away a 2-goal lead to find ourselves 3-2 down when we won a free kick. The manager was screaming for the centre half to go up for it(big fella and good in the air). He shouted back that the box was too full, the manager started shouting "do what you're told and get in the box you cunt".

 

The centre back just walked off the pitch and I'm still not sure how it didn't turn into fisticuffs. Anyway, we won 4-3 and all is resolved.

 

Our centre back was saying he'd never been spoken to like that in all his years playing football.

[McFaul 35]

This kid Noonie who used to play for me, about 5 years older than me biggest babbie you ever saw in your life, 6ft4 18st, the definition of attitude, he used to do that Barney if a decision went against him, he'd pick the ball up and drop kick it miles off the pitch. Was funny when we were young, but it's amazing how your perception of people changes when you get older. What a mug.

 

 

ridiculous!

 

Our centre back and manager had a huge row last week. we pissed away a 2-goal lead to find ourselves 3-2 down when we won a free kick. The manager was screaming for the centre half to go up for it(big fella and good in the air). He shouted back that the box was too full, the manager started shouting "do what you're told and get in the box you cunt".

 

The centre back just walked off the pitch and I'm still not sure how it didn't turn into fisticuffs. Anyway, we won 4-3 and all is resolved.

 

Our centre back was saying he'd never been spoken to like that in all his years playing football.

hahaha

 

I wouldn't have stood for that like. At half time one manager had a go at me for not passing (I hit the post) when another kid had an open goal, proper go at me, and I thought am the striker, fucking I'd do it again I should've scored I missed, so I said "ye naa Kev I'd dee the same thing again", he lost his temper and went "ya not cos ya comin off ya prick", I tried to get at him showing me up in front of people, but people stopped me, and we made up the next week, but I still remember it eight years on. It's a passionate game, if people can't understand that they should fuckin get fat and play dominoes or something.

 

Good win last neet Barney, mind Italy are pretty pish though, that was near their strongest team too, and probs 4 of yours would be in your strongest team. Even McShane played well

[Barney 0]

Captain McShane?

 

Good win alright, Italy were hugely hyped by their press as a new outfit after they 'did a Spain' on Estonia the other night.(huge posession, lots of 1 touch passing). They have a few new faces in there too, with Rossi and Pazzini looking to nail down a starting spot.

 

Estonia then went and got beaten by the Faroe Islands last night(!).

[McFaul 35]

Captain McShane?

 

Good win alright, Italy were hugely hyped by their press as a new outfit after they 'did a Spain' on Estonia the other night.(huge posession, lots of 1 touch passing). They have a few new faces in there too, with Rossi and Pazzini looking to nail down a starting spot.

 

Estonia then went and got beaten by the Faroe Islands last night(!).

Ireland deserved it though, but I tell you how shite I think Italy are, England are a very poor side, but we're better than him. Thought Keith Andrews was excellent in midfield, Stephen motm though.

[Barney 0]

Blackburn fans fucking hate Andrews(correct me if I'm wrong, Billy C.), he always does a job for us.

 

I agree about Italy though, some decent individuals. We showed them way too much respect in previous encounters.

[ajax_andy 0]

Our lunchtime games aren't too bad since it's the same crowd and teams get changed every week, everyone knows it's not stupidly competitive and don't fly into tackles/go in if you think your likely to clip someone.

That being said there is a few feuds that run, one with myself and another lad, high up civil servant real arrogant thinks he's king dick, about my height but good 4 stone heavier easily.

 

If we're defending a corner, he'll literally stand facing me with his back to the corner the balls coming from he's just a tosser.

I'm still pretty quick from my running days for being one of the bigger lads, anytime I ghost past him he'll basically take a slide in for a swipe trying to catch me before i get away, pathetic like, too fat/slow so you can see it coming a mile away to avoid it.

 

 

Not worth risking wrecking someone in those games, lad about a month ago, no one near him or anything just stood on the ball, whole leg just buckled underneath him awful looking. to quote his email

 

"Fellow footballing well wishers ,

 

I thought I would update you on the results of my MRI which I got this morning. To quote the doctor "You've done a proper job on your knee".

 

He later went on to explain that this meant the damage was:

Cruciate Ligament (torn ACL),

Medial Ligament (torn MCL),

Meniscus tear (possibly an old injury),

Small tear in the Patellar tendon, and Bruising to the bones."

 

Need to be properly hate someone to risk giving them that sort've knock!

 

 

Ouch!

 

Yeah I play on Thursday with mates and its a very mild mannered game with no real fouls or a lot of appologising if there is one, and its always an accident.

 

Tbh thats a bit tame for me though... I like a game where people get stuck in, however only if its a fair attempt to get the ball. What I cant stand is people doing sly stuff off it, or deliberatly trying to break your leg, or do proper damage when you have the ball.

Edited June 8, 2011 by ajax_andy

[Gemmill 44996]

Nowt worse than the amateur sportsman that thinks everything's the FA cup final. Particularly the gimp that barks orders and gets completely stressed out with teammates, draining any joy out of what is a meaningless fucking kickabout.

[donaldstott 0]

Anyone have any idea if i'll get a ban for being sent off? I wont be happy if I do as the ref should of had more control of the match and prevented it getting to that stage!

 

I doubt the 5-a-side league has any afiliation with the FA, so it won't affect Sunday or Saturday football. The 5 a-side league I ref in would ban you from future games though.

 

As for the second half of that sentence it's amazing how many times you hear that - "I'm ganna lamp him and it'll be your fault" - which is just utter bollocks. I'm afraid you've got to take responsibility for your own actions.

[ajax_andy 0]

Anyone have any idea if i'll get a ban for being sent off? I wont be happy if I do as the ref should of had more control of the match and prevented it getting to that stage!

 

I doubt the 5-a-side league has any afiliation with the FA, so it won't affect Sunday or Saturday football. The 5 a-side league I ref in would ban you from future games though.

 

As for the second half of that sentence it's amazing how many times you hear that - "I'm ganna lamp him and it'll be your fault" - which is just utter bollocks. I'm afraid you've got to take responsibility for your own actions.

 

 

No denying I shouldn't have kicked out, but at the end of the day this had been going on all game. If the ref doesn't deal with it then eventually its going to boil over and something will happen. I wasn't looking for a fight, I was trying to get on with the game, and what I did was in a mad moment of retaliation.

 

I'm not gonna have some divvy punching me in the back and then trying to break my leg without eventually reacting.

 

Aye I dont play Saturday or Sunday footy so its a ban from the 5-a-side that i'm worried about, how long do you think i'll get if I do get one?

[sweetleftpeg 0]

What I'm noticing more and more from young uns coming into our 5-a-side league is cheating and timewasting. It's so bad it's actually gone from annoying to comical. It's the Sky generation who learnt stuff off the tele. I've always defended football when non-footballing fans have a rant about footballers being bad role models and saying that kids don't really copy them. However, when you see kids picking the ball up, jogging away with it, then dropping it behind their back like their in some sort of Champions League quarter final that argument falls flat. Cheating and poor sportsmanship is especially bad these days, stealing yards, timewasting (it's 5 a fucking side man!) and worst of all diving. It's got pretty pathetic amongst some of the younger lads now like.

[donaldstott 0]

Anyone have any idea if i'll get a ban for being sent off? I wont be happy if I do as the ref should of had more control of the match and prevented it getting to that stage!

 

I doubt the 5-a-side league has any afiliation with the FA, so it won't affect Sunday or Saturday football. The 5 a-side league I ref in would ban you from future games though.

 

As for the second half of that sentence it's amazing how many times you hear that - "I'm ganna lamp him and it'll be your fault" - which is just utter bollocks. I'm afraid you've got to take responsibility for your own actions.

 

 

No denying I shouldn't have kicked out, but at the end of the day this had been going on all game. If the ref doesn't deal with it then eventually its going to boil over and something will happen. I wasn't looking for a fight, I was trying to get on with the game, and what I did was in a mad moment of retaliation.

 

I'm not gonna have some divvy punching me in the back and then trying to break my leg without eventually reacting.

 

Aye I dont play Saturday or Sunday footy so its a ban from the 5-a-side that i'm worried about, how long do you think i'll get if I do get one?

 

Depends how on the ball the league are. Our lot would probably ban you for a couple of games.

What I would do though is complain about the other team, see if they are causing other teams problems. Threaten to leave if necessary, invariably teams like that get kicked out of the leagues I ref at.

 

It doesn't sound like the ref you've got is particularly strong, but it is difficult especially when players are deliberately kicking off behind their backs. No ref in their right mind would take action on something they haven't seen.

[ajax_andy 0]

Anyone have any idea if i'll get a ban for being sent off? I wont be happy if I do as the ref should of had more control of the match and prevented it getting to that stage!

 

I doubt the 5-a-side league has any afiliation with the FA, so it won't affect Sunday or Saturday football. The 5 a-side league I ref in would ban you from future games though.

 

As for the second half of that sentence it's amazing how many times you hear that - "I'm ganna lamp him and it'll be your fault" - which is just utter bollocks. I'm afraid you've got to take responsibility for your own actions.

 

 

No denying I shouldn't have kicked out, but at the end of the day this had been going on all game. If the ref doesn't deal with it then eventually its going to boil over and something will happen. I wasn't looking for a fight, I was trying to get on with the game, and what I did was in a mad moment of retaliation.

 

I'm not gonna have some divvy punching me in the back and then trying to break my leg without eventually reacting.

 

Aye I dont play Saturday or Sunday footy so its a ban from the 5-a-side that i'm worried about, how long do you think i'll get if I do get one?

 

Depends how on the ball the league are. Our lot would probably ban you for a couple of games.

What I would do though is complain about the other team, see if they are causing other teams problems. Threaten to leave if necessary, invariably teams like that get kicked out of the leagues I ref at.

 

It doesn't sound like the ref you've got is particularly strong, but it is difficult especially when players are deliberately kicking off behind their backs. No ref in their right mind would take action on something they haven't seen.

 

Aye I could handle a couple of games ban, I shouldn't have kicked out and so would accept that punishment... anymore and i'd be pretty pissed off tho.

 

No the ref isn't strong at all, he sits on the boards looking disinterested half the time, and if he'd had a better grip on the match I dont think as much stuff would have been going on off the ball.

 

Good idea to complain about the other team, i'll do that as I didnt get the impression this was just them having a bad day, it's clear they behave like this all the time!

[ajax_andy 0]

Ok so I just e-mailed the venue with the following (not sure how serious they'll take it seeing as I was the one sent off for violent conduct):

 

 

 

We played a team last night in our division 3 match and would like to put in a complaint about their behaviour.

 

On several occasions one of their players punched on of our team in the back (off the ball) when the referee wasn’t looking, he also elbowed another member of our team in the back (off the ball) when the referee was again looking elsewhere. These incidents were deliberate acts of violence.

 

They also spent the majority of the game making no attempt to play the ball when going in for tackles. This culminated in 2 of them diving in from either side of one of our players with no intention other than to injure him.

 

Their behaviour was not what I would expect from a team playing in a 5-a-side league at your establishment, and I’m sure that you would agree punching/elbowing people off the ball, and trying to deliberately injure someone isn’t acceptable in the slightest!

 

Unfortunately the referee missed the off the ball incidents and therefore was unable to act upon them. I ask that you inform referees to be aware of this team’s behaviour so that other teams are not subjected to this and referees can stop incidents like this escalating and turning matches in to a complete farce (as was the case last night)

 

This team had no intention of playing the game, and I am certain you will have further problems with their behaviour in the future.

 

I have spoken to my team and they have all agreed that if we face this team again and they demonstrate the same behaviour we will withdraw from the league.

[Besty 4]

Used to get a fine down the Pitz for a red I think, not that anyone paid. Not sure what it's like at other places.

[McFaul 35]

Can't mind the fine at the Pitz like, but if you even got a yellow card at Eldon Rec you were banned for the next game. That fuckin ref Trevor used to dish them oot like he was dishin oot benefits to asylum seekers. Me and Alex have discussed him before, what a cunt he was like really, someone you remember 15 years on that's how much.

 

Considering retiring to be honest, knees are nee good pardon the pun, this game might be me testimonial.