Mac-Toon 1 Posted December 24, 2010 Share Posted December 24, 2010 Just back from Tesco. One fucking check out girl and the self service was all they had on. I was only looking a copy of Home Alone. I did feel a bit weird buying it at 2am. The looks you get when you go into a supermarket at half 2 in the morning and buy a microwave cottage pie, a Playstation Move and a bottle of Pepsi is something to be treasured. Not as bad as moisturising lotion, tissues and a Hannah Montana calendar. They fucking hate that. I bought a game in Tesco the other week and the wife went "oh, is this a present?" And I just went "nar" Her face was saying "what a right sad twat" If I was her, I wouldn't be judging like, not with the tattoos she had. I was in asda on wednesday night and loading up the belt with about a hundred quids worth of shopping. Some old wife appeared behind me with just a loaf of bread and some eggs. I said 'Is that all you've got, flower?' She said Yes so I said 'Ye best fuck off to another checkout then I'm gonna be ages with this lot' Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
luckyluke 2 Posted December 24, 2010 Share Posted December 24, 2010 You horrid cunt. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Park Life 71 Posted December 24, 2010 Share Posted December 24, 2010 Just back from Tesco. One fucking check out girl and the self service was all they had on. I was only looking a copy of Home Alone. I did feel a bit weird buying it at 2am. The looks you get when you go into a supermarket at half 2 in the morning and buy a microwave cottage pie, a Playstation Move and a bottle of Pepsi is something to be treasured. It's much worse if you're buying big bags of fertilizer and wearing a wig. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ayatollah Hermione 13621 Posted December 24, 2010 Share Posted December 24, 2010 Just back from Tesco. One fucking check out girl and the self service was all they had on. I was only looking a copy of Home Alone. I did feel a bit weird buying it at 2am. The looks you get when you go into a supermarket at half 2 in the morning and buy a microwave cottage pie, a Playstation Move and a bottle of Pepsi is something to be treasured. It's much worse if you're buying big bags of fertilizer and wearing a wig. A shovel, some rope and a pair of latex gloves always catches the eye. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Billy Castell 0 Posted December 24, 2010 Share Posted December 24, 2010 Quite a while ago, when I was in Devon, a man of around 24 was in front of me in the queue at the till with condoms, KY Jelly and baby food. Make of that what you will. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Monroe Transfer 0 Posted December 24, 2010 Share Posted December 24, 2010 Preparing for a split condom leading to pregnancy due to rigorous intercourse brought on by over-confidence in the quality of KY Jelly. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dr Kenneth Noisewater 0 Posted December 24, 2010 Share Posted December 24, 2010 Just back from Tesco. One fucking check out girl and the self service was all they had on. I was only looking a copy of Home Alone. I did feel a bit weird buying it at 2am. The looks you get when you go into a supermarket at half 2 in the morning and buy a microwave cottage pie, a Playstation Move and a bottle of Pepsi is something to be treasured. It's much worse if you're buying big bags of fertilizer and wearing a wig. A shovel, some rope and a pair of latex gloves always catches the eye. Cable ties, gaffer tape and a balaclava is another one. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sweetleftpeg 0 Posted December 24, 2010 Share Posted December 24, 2010 I also thought this was about getting dumped at Christmas. On a similar note, lad I work with has just changed his relationship status on Facebook to 'single.' He's engaged to a lass he's lived with for 8 years. Oh dear. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dr Kenneth Noisewater 0 Posted December 24, 2010 Share Posted December 24, 2010 Can't be arsed to go to town for the end of the shopping today faakin freezin in Newcastle and it's still snowing, gonna be a mad last minute dash tomorrow, why change the habit of a life time? That theory has held me in good stead for years and I will continue to utilise it. It makes it all the more exciting seeing thousands of 30 something males storming around town and picking up any owld shite that they think'll dee. Petrol station is open in the morning. No rush. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gejon 2 Posted December 24, 2010 Share Posted December 24, 2010 Not in now until 04/01/2011 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
luckyluke 2 Posted December 24, 2010 Share Posted December 24, 2010 Can't be arsed to go to town for the end of the shopping today faakin freezin in Newcastle and it's still snowing, gonna be a mad last minute dash tomorrow, why change the habit of a life time? That theory has held me in good stead for years and I will continue to utilise it. It makes it all the more exciting seeing thousands of 30 something males storming around town and picking up any owld shite that they think'll dee. Petrol station is open in the morning. No rush. Pacing yourself, like it. Also loving your Christmas avatar! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Monkeys Fist 41362 Posted December 24, 2010 Share Posted December 24, 2010 Just back from Tesco. One fucking check out girl and the self service was all they had on. I was only looking a copy of Home Alone. I did feel a bit weird buying it at 2am. The looks you get when you go into a supermarket at half 2 in the morning and buy a microwave cottage pie, a Playstation Move and a bottle of Pepsi is something to be treasured. It's much worse if you're buying big bags of fertilizer and wearing a wig. A shovel, some rope and a pair of latex gloves always catches the eye. Cable ties, gaffer tape and a balaclava is another one. And stare, silenty and relentlessly , at the lone checkout girl.… Then give her a wink when you get your change from her trembling hand, Mwahahaha! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dr Kenneth Noisewater 0 Posted December 24, 2010 Share Posted December 24, 2010 Can't be arsed to go to town for the end of the shopping today faakin freezin in Newcastle and it's still snowing, gonna be a mad last minute dash tomorrow, why change the habit of a life time? That theory has held me in good stead for years and I will continue to utilise it. It makes it all the more exciting seeing thousands of 30 something males storming around town and picking up any owld shite that they think'll dee. Petrol station is open in the morning. No rush. Pacing yourself, like it. Also loving your Christmas avatar! Canny rack on her, Mrs Claus Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Barney 0 Posted December 24, 2010 Share Posted December 24, 2010 I also thought this was about getting dumped at Christmas. On a similar note, lad I work with has just changed his relationship status on Facebook to 'single.' He's engaged to a lass he's lived with for 8 years. Oh dear. Might be just keeping her on her toes. Happy Christmas, homos. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gemmill 42766 Posted January 2, 2011 Author Share Posted January 2, 2011 Fuck-a-duck, it seems like yesterday I was starting this thread. How the fuck do holidays go by so fast?! I always get dead miserable post-Christmas when I'm watching stuff on Sky+ and it's all the Christmas graphics, and "Here's what's coming up on Christmas Day...!" and stuff. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dr Gloom 21347 Posted January 2, 2011 Share Posted January 2, 2011 I've got the fear about going back to work already and it's still two days away Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest You FCB Get Out Of Our Club Posted January 3, 2011 Share Posted January 3, 2011 I've got the fear about going back to work already and it's still two days away Me too. Don't get me wrong I like what I do, it's more interesting than lots of jobs, and who you are, how you speak to people and influence them often dictates how successful you are. However, I'd gladly never work again if I had a million pound in the bank. If I sound like a lazy cunt I don't care, if I had the money I'd develop a company with a business plan and get someone else to run it, instead of being just another little ant in an organisation running round after the queen. Seems two minutes ago I was heading down to London for our christmas do, and it's nearly three fuckin weeks. I wish it was the 15th December again. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Barney 0 Posted January 3, 2011 Share Posted January 3, 2011 I feel the same. I had lots of plans this Christmas that I never went through with(meeting up with certain people/stuff around the house etc). On the plus side I'm back in the gym tomorrow and have my first footy match in 3 weeks tomorrow night. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
NJS 4266 Posted January 3, 2011 Share Posted January 3, 2011 I'm looking forward to the world re-opening so I can get on with getting a new fucking job. I'm sure people have been sitting on CVs and sanctioning recruitment using the "leave it till the new year" shit so they'd better be getting their arses in gear now. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jusoda Kid 1 Posted January 3, 2011 Share Posted January 3, 2011 I've rarely been out, just lay about watching shit on the telly and stuffing my face, as I'd planned. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gemmill 42766 Posted January 3, 2011 Author Share Posted January 3, 2011 I've rarely been out, just lay about watching shit on the telly and stuffing my face, as I'd planned. Ditto. I'm gonna have one last mince pie tonight, tears streaming down my face, lamenting the lost freedom. Face frozen in a silent sob of anguish, sweet mince drool hanging off my chin. You get the picture. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Besty 4 Posted January 3, 2011 Share Posted January 3, 2011 Took tomorrow off. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jusoda Kid 1 Posted January 3, 2011 Share Posted January 3, 2011 I've rarely been out, just lay about watching shit on the telly and stuffing my face, as I'd planned. Ditto. I'm gonna have one last mince pie tonight, tears streaming down my face, lamenting the lost freedom. Face frozen in a silent sob of anguish, sweet mince drool hanging off my chin. You get the picture. I've had every intention of getting up early and doing things but when it's came to it I've managed to get the bairns to go back to sleep and for another couple of hours, then got up and just lazed around. Dreading this month though, I hate January. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gemmill 42766 Posted January 3, 2011 Author Share Posted January 3, 2011 Aye me too. If I could sleep through January I would. My boss isn't back in til next Monday so I'm gonna try and keep a low profile this week and do fuck all, finish on time every day etc. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Toonraider 0 Posted January 3, 2011 Share Posted January 3, 2011 I've rarely been out, just lay about watching shit on the telly and stuffing my face, as I'd planned. Ditto. I'm gonna have one last mince pie tonight, tears streaming down my face, lamenting the lost freedom. Face frozen in a silent sob of anguish, sweet mince drool hanging off my chin. You get the picture. Yeah, and very attractive it is too Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts
Create an account or sign in to comment
You need to be a member in order to leave a comment
Create an account
Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!
Register a new accountSign in
Already have an account? Sign in here.
Sign In Now