Meenzer 16346 Posted January 24, 2024 Share Posted January 24, 2024 8 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Howmanheyman 36328 Posted January 24, 2024 Share Posted January 24, 2024 On 24/01/2024 at 17:22, Monkeys Fist said: A bear walks into a butchers to buy a steak.... The butcher is taken aback but gathers himself and says, "That'll be £60 sir". "Here you go", says the bear, paying with two £50 notes. "You know, we don't see many talking bears buying steaks and paying cash here”, says the butcher as he returns the change to the bear. Bear says, " I'm hardly fucking surprised at that price”. Expand 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Monkeys Fist 44978 Posted January 24, 2024 Share Posted January 24, 2024 On 24/01/2024 at 17:23, Meenzer said: Expand 1 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Monkeys Fist 44978 Posted January 24, 2024 Share Posted January 24, 2024 On 24/01/2024 at 17:28, Howmanheyman said: Expand Grin and bear it. 1 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Toonpack 11291 Posted January 24, 2024 Share Posted January 24, 2024 7 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Howmanheyman 36328 Posted January 24, 2024 Share Posted January 24, 2024 On 24/01/2024 at 17:36, Toonpack said: Expand "Fuck off." 5 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Monkeys Fist 44978 Posted January 24, 2024 Share Posted January 24, 2024 On 24/01/2024 at 17:36, Toonpack said: Expand Also 6 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dazzler 11627 Posted January 24, 2024 Share Posted January 24, 2024 On 24/01/2024 at 17:22, Monkeys Fist said: A bear walks into a butchers to buy a steak.... The butcher is taken aback but gathers himself and says, "That'll be £60 sir". "Here you go", says the bear, paying with two £50 notes. "You know, we don't see many talking bears buying steaks and paying cash here”, says the butcher as he returns the change to the bear. Bear says, " I'm hardly fucking surprised at that price”. Expand 4 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RobinRobin 12410 Posted January 25, 2024 Share Posted January 25, 2024 On 24/01/2024 at 14:57, Monkeys Fist said: How many Spaniards does it take to change a light bulb? Just Juan. Expand 6 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tdansmith 3260 Posted January 26, 2024 Share Posted January 26, 2024 Every year, Smitty and his wife Martha went to the State Fair. And every year, Smitty would say, “Martha, I’d like to ride in that there airplane.” And every year, Martha would reply, “I know, Smitty, but that airplane ride costs ten dollars, and ten dollars is ten dollars.” This one year Smitty and Martha went to the fair and Smitty said, “Martha, I’m 71 years old. If I don’t ride that airplane this year I may never get another chance. ” Martha replied, “Smitty, that there airplane ride costs ten dollars, and ten dollars is ten dollars.” The pilot overheard them and said, “Folks, I’ll make you a deal. I’ll take you both up for a ride. If you can stay quiet for the entire ride and not say one word, I won’t charge you, but if you say one word it’s ten dollars.” Smitty and Martha agreed, and up they went. The pilot performed all kinds of twists and turns, rolls and dives, but not a word is heard. He even does a nose dive, pulling up 15 feet above the ground, but still not a word. They land and the pilot turns to Smitty, “By golly, I did everything I could think of to get you to yell out, but you didn’t.” Smitty replied, “Well, I was gonna say something when Martha fell out, …but ten dollars is ten dollars!” 5 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tdansmith 3260 Posted January 26, 2024 Share Posted January 26, 2024 I asked my date to meet me at the gym. She never showed up. That’s how I knew we weren’t going to work out. 🤪 2 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Monkeys Fist 44978 Posted January 26, 2024 Share Posted January 26, 2024 On 26/01/2024 at 23:34, Tdansmith said: I asked my date to meet me at the gym. She never showed up. That’s how I knew we weren’t going to work out. 🤪 Expand 4 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RobinRobin 12410 Posted January 27, 2024 Share Posted January 27, 2024 On 26/01/2024 at 23:34, Tdansmith said: I asked my date to meet me at the gym. She never showed up. That’s how I knew we weren’t going to work out. 🤪 Expand 4 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Fish 11313 Posted January 29, 2024 Share Posted January 29, 2024 On 26/01/2024 at 23:42, Monkeys Fist said: Expand What film is that from? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PaddockLad 18915 Posted January 29, 2024 Share Posted January 29, 2024 On 29/01/2024 at 11:30, The Fish said: What film is that from? Expand Gregory’s Girl, the directors cut 5 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Fish 11313 Posted January 29, 2024 Share Posted January 29, 2024 On 29/01/2024 at 11:33, PaddockLad said: Gregory’s Girl, the directors cut Expand You, sir, are a goddamn liar. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PaddockLad 18915 Posted January 29, 2024 Share Posted January 29, 2024 On 29/01/2024 at 11:51, The Fish said: You, sir, are a goddamn liar. Expand 5 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RobinRobin 12410 Posted January 30, 2024 Share Posted January 30, 2024 On 29/01/2024 at 11:33, PaddockLad said: Gregory’s Girl, the directors cut Expand Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dr Gloom 23464 Posted January 30, 2024 Author Share Posted January 30, 2024 On 19/01/2024 at 14:21, Gemmill said: This thread has basically become old man Facebook. Expand 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dr Gloom 23464 Posted January 30, 2024 Author Share Posted January 30, 2024 On 24/01/2024 at 17:36, Toonpack said: Expand my wife threatened to leave me if I didn’t give up my disgusting habits. i was so surprised I almost spat out my toenails 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RobinRobin 12410 Posted January 30, 2024 Share Posted January 30, 2024 On 30/01/2024 at 09:32, Dr Gloom said: my wife threatened to leave me if I didn’t give up my disgusting habits. i was so surprised I almost spat out my toenails Expand 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Monkeys Fist 44978 Posted January 30, 2024 Share Posted January 30, 2024 On 30/01/2024 at 09:32, Dr Gloom said: my wife threatened to leave me if I didn’t give up my disgusting habits. i was so surprised I almost spat out my toenails Expand Mrs. F. told me if I didn’t stop quoting Oasis lyrics she’d be kicking me out She asked “ Is that what you want, Fist?” I said “Maybe”. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
trophyshy 7279 Posted January 30, 2024 Share Posted January 30, 2024 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dazzler 11627 Posted January 30, 2024 Share Posted January 30, 2024 On 30/01/2024 at 12:27, Monkeys Fist said: Mrs. F. told me if I didn’t stop quoting Oasis lyrics she’d be kicking me out She asked “ Is that what you want, Fist?” I said “Maybe”. Expand 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Fish 11313 Posted January 30, 2024 Share Posted January 30, 2024 On 30/01/2024 at 12:27, Monkeys Fist said: Mrs. F. told me if I didn’t stop quoting Oasis lyrics she’d be kicking me out She asked “ Is that what you want, Fist?” I said “Maybe”. Expand 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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