Kevin Carr's Gloves 4290 Posted January 6 Share Posted January 6 On 06/01/2025 at 20:28, Dr Gloom said: A book just fell on my head. I only have my shelf to blame Expand 4 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dr Gloom 23871 Posted January 6 Author Share Posted January 6 I wasn’t sure about my beard at first But then it grew on me 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RobinRobin 12625 Posted January 7 Share Posted January 7 On 06/01/2025 at 20:28, Dr Gloom said: A book just fell on my head. I only have my shelf to blame Expand On 06/01/2025 at 21:14, Dr Gloom said: I wasn’t sure about my beard at first But then it grew on me Expand 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Toonpack 11683 Posted January 7 Share Posted January 7 On 06/01/2025 at 21:14, Dr Gloom said: I wasn’t sure about my beard at first But then it grew on me Expand 6 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dr Gloom 23871 Posted January 7 Author Share Posted January 7 i saw an old man fall into a well. i guess he couldn't see that well Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dr Gloom 23871 Posted January 7 Author Share Posted January 7 the wife threatened to leave me if don't give up my disgusting habits. i was so shocked, i nearly spat out my toenails Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Toonpack 11683 Posted January 7 Share Posted January 7 Someone’s been raiding bins for Christmas cracker jokes. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Monkeys Fist 45719 Posted January 7 Share Posted January 7 On 07/01/2025 at 12:58, Toonpack said: Someone’s been raiding bins for Christmas cracker jokes. Expand Mrs. F. threatened to leave me if I didn’t stop constantly quoting Oasis lyrics. I said “Maybe”. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
wykikitoon 23274 Posted January 7 Share Posted January 7 Some might say that's nasty of her. 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Toonpack 11683 Posted January 7 Share Posted January 7 On 07/01/2025 at 14:37, Monkeys Fist said: Mrs. F. threatened to leave me if I didn’t stop constantly quoting Oasis lyrics. I said “Maybe”. Expand 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RobinRobin 12625 Posted January 8 Share Posted January 8 On 07/01/2025 at 12:49, Dr Gloom said: i saw an old man fall into a well. i guess he couldn't see that well Expand On 07/01/2025 at 12:51, Dr Gloom said: the wife threatened to leave me if don't give up my disgusting habits. i was so shocked, i nearly spat out my toenails Expand I refer the honourable gentleman to my previous post. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Alex 37149 Posted January 8 Share Posted January 8 On 06/01/2025 at 20:28, Dr Gloom said: A book just fell on my head. I only have my shelf to blame Expand 4 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Toonpack 11683 Posted January 22 Share Posted January 22 You can't tell if a joke is a bad joke unless it's full groan. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dr Gloom 23871 Posted January 22 Author Share Posted January 22 The wife and I had a massive row about whose turn it was to do the laundry. I finally threw in the towel. 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Howmanheyman 36993 Posted January 22 Share Posted January 22 A private jet has about twenty minutes of fuel left before it's about to crash, there's four passengers on board the stricken aircraft but only three parachutes. The passengers discuss their options but realise one of them is going to miss out on safety. The first passenger doesn't mess around, he says, 'I'm Cristiano Ronaldo, I have millions of fans all around the world who would miss me if I die.' So with that he grabs the first chute and jumps out. No sooner than he does that the next man says, 'I'm President Trump, the greatest and smartest president in the history of the United States of America, my people couldn't live if their president died.' He then grabs the second chute and jumps out. The third person is Kevin Keegan and the last person is a young lad. Keegan says to the boy, 'I've lived most of my life, son, you've got yours ahead of you, you take the last chute and make the most of your life.' The kid then says, 'Its alright King Kev, there's parachutes for us both, the greatest and smartest president in the history of the United States of America took my satchel instead.' 5 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ewerk 33533 Posted January 23 Share Posted January 23 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Toonpack 11683 Posted January 28 Share Posted January 28 Lad I’ve known since middle school punched me so hard in the stomach I shat myself !! With friends like that who needs enemas 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Monkeys Fist 45719 Posted January 28 Share Posted January 28 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RobinRobin 12625 Posted January 29 Share Posted January 29 On 28/01/2025 at 19:35, Toonpack said: Lad I’ve known since middle school punched me so hard in the stomach I shat myself !! With friends like that who needs enemas Expand 5 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Fish 11333 Posted January 29 Share Posted January 29 On 28/01/2025 at 19:35, Toonpack said: Lad I’ve known since middle school punched me so hard in the stomach I shat myself !! With friends like that who needs enemas Expand 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dr Gloom 23871 Posted January 29 Author Share Posted January 29 My mate keeps telling me to cheer up, things could be worse: you could be stuck in a hole underground full of water. I know he means well 6 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Howmanheyman 36993 Posted January 29 Share Posted January 29 On 29/01/2025 at 10:16, Dr Gloom said: My mate keeps telling me to cheer up, things could be worse: you could be stuck in a hole underground full of water. I know he means well Expand Pinching that. 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Monkeys Fist 45719 Posted January 29 Share Posted January 29 About a month before he died, my uncle fell in a vat of lard. After that, he went downhill rapidly. 5 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dr Gloom 23871 Posted January 29 Author Share Posted January 29 On 29/01/2025 at 10:22, Monkeys Fist said: About a month before he died, my uncle fell in a vat of lard. After that, he went downhill rapidly. Expand 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Monkeys Fist 45719 Posted January 29 Share Posted January 29 Got some blood test results from the doc yesterday … Doc- ” Mr. Fist, I’ve never seen this before in my career- your DNA is back to front” Me- “ And?” 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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