PaddockLad 19228 Posted February 17 Share Posted February 17 11 hours ago, trophyshy said: I’ve just spent £300 on a limousine then discovered the fee doesn’t include a driver. Can’t believe I’ve spent all that money and nothing to chauffeur it. 5 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
wykikitoon 23253 Posted February 18 Share Posted February 18 I just had a physical. The doctor said, "Don't eat anything fatty. I said, "Like bacon and burgers?" "No fatty, don't eat anything!" 6 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sonatine 12043 Posted February 18 Share Posted February 18 6 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RobinRobin 12623 Posted February 18 Share Posted February 18 10 minutes ago, wykikitoon said: I just had a physical. The doctor said, "Don't eat anything fatty. I said, "Like bacon and burgers?" "No fatty, don't eat anything!" 6 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Howmanheyman 36978 Posted February 18 Share Posted February 18 1 hour ago, wykikitoon said: I just had a physical. The doctor said, "Don't eat anything fatty. I said, "Like bacon and burgers?" "No fatty, don't eat anything!" Surely there's some sort of compromise the doctor could make with you? Maybe just one sausage with cooked tomato instead of bacon in wholemeal bread? 4 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ewerk 33501 Posted February 18 Share Posted February 18 Don't listen to him wyki, you still look great. 9 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dazzler 12108 Posted February 18 Share Posted February 18 3 hours ago, ewerk said: Don't listen to him wyki, you still look great. Let us all spare a moment for the poor pervert who sniffs this seat. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sonatine 12043 Posted February 18 Share Posted February 18 4 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RobinRobin 12623 Posted February 19 Share Posted February 19 9 hours ago, Dazzler said: Let us all spare a moment for the poor pervert who sniffs this seat. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Wardi 280 Posted March 11 Share Posted March 11 I witnessed a convicted Dwarf attempting to make good his escape from Durham jail today by shimmying down the prison wall via some tied together blankets. I thought to myself ' that's just a little condescending'. 6 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Monkeys Fist 45713 Posted March 11 Share Posted March 11 I knew a lad, dwarf, who was a heroin addict. I asked him why he got in to drugs and he said ” To get high”. 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RobinRobin 12623 Posted March 12 Share Posted March 12 5 hours ago, Monkeys Fist said: I knew a lad, dwarf, who was a heroin addict. I asked him why he got in to drugs and he said ” To get high”. 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
wykikitoon 23253 Posted March 16 Share Posted March 16 8 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Monkeys Fist 45713 Posted March 16 Share Posted March 16 My lad asked me why boxers usually don’t have sex in the weeks leading to a fight. I said ” They usually don’t like each other mate “ Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Howmanheyman 36978 Posted March 16 Share Posted March 16 5 hours ago, wykikitoon said: Real life was was more surreal than that, tbh. 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Monkeys Fist 45713 Posted March 16 Share Posted March 16 17 minutes ago, Howmanheyman said: Real life was was more surreal than that, tbh. Remember when you turned up to work in a ball gown and the gaffer said ” Go on then, give us a Twirl?” Happy days… 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RobinRobin 12623 Posted March 17 Share Posted March 17 12 hours ago, Monkeys Fist said: My lad asked me why boxers usually don’t have sex in the weeks leading to a fight. I said ” They usually don’t like each other mate “ 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
aimaad22 4824 Posted Thursday at 22:38 Share Posted Thursday at 22:38 (edited) What do you call a gender neutral person who is lactose intolerant? Non buy dairy Edited Friday at 06:54 by aimaad22 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Monkeys Fist 45713 Posted Thursday at 23:19 Share Posted Thursday at 23:19 40 minutes ago, aimaad22 said: What do you call a gender neutral person who is lactose intolerant? Non buy diary 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
aimaad22 4824 Posted Thursday at 23:25 Share Posted Thursday at 23:25 What would you say to console them if that joke was upsetting? Their their 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RobinRobin 12623 Posted Friday at 02:29 Share Posted Friday at 02:29 3 hours ago, aimaad22 said: What do you call a gender neutral person who is lactose intolerant? Non buy diary 3 hours ago, aimaad22 said: What would you say to console them if that joke was upsetting? Their their Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Monkeys Fist 45713 Posted Friday at 08:13 Share Posted Friday at 08:13 “Knock Knock!” ”Whos there?” ”Hike” ” Hike Who” “ Unsuspecting son. Dad waiting with bated breath, Sets the perfect trap” 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dazzler 12108 Posted Friday at 13:45 Share Posted Friday at 13:45 I was working in a shop when the cashier called me over. He said, "These two blokes came in and tried to give me some fake fifty pound notes." "What did they look like?" I asked. He said, "Fifty pound notes." 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Craig 6947 Posted Saturday at 11:34 Share Posted Saturday at 11:34 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Monkeys Fist 45713 Posted Saturday at 12:51 Share Posted Saturday at 12:51 Totally the wrong thread, but can anyone explain to me why Tom Petty is so highly rated? He’s like a shit, middle-of-the-road AC/DC, writes the same song over and over again. The song named in the pic above is the only song of his that I can think of. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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