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if you heard a joke today, post it


Dr Gloom
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2 minutes ago, Monkeys Fist said:

Englishman, Irishman and Scotchman walk in to a bar. 
 

The barman says

” Fuck off, it’s Scotsman, you sassenach cunt! “

FYP

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26 minutes ago, Monkeys Fist said:

Englishman, Irishman and Scotchman walk in to a bar. 
 

The barman says

” Fuck off, I’ve heard this one! “

dead wink martindale GIF

  • Haha 3
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1 hour ago, Monkeys Fist said:

Seems like you lads have opinions which are polar opposites …

 

Why don't you just stick driving your arcticulated waggon mate.

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3 hours ago, spongebob toonpants said:

 

Is this how low we've sunk

 

Horse walks into a bar

 

Barman says "Why the long face?

 

a classic of the genre :lol:

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Horse walks into a bar and the barman says "wow, you again, you're in here an awful lot, do you think you could be an alcoholic ?"

 

The horse says "I think I am..." And suddenly just disappears.

 

This joke is a play on Descartes philosophical "I think therefore I am" which I could have pointed out to start with, but it would have spoiled things putting Descartes before the horse.

 

FOIA

  • Haha 5
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16 minutes ago, Toonpack said:

Horse walks into a bar and the barman says "wow, you again, you're in here an awful lot, do you think you could be an alcoholic ?"

 

The horse says "I think I am..." And suddenly just disappears.

 

This joke is a play on Descartes philosophical "I think therefore I am" which I could have pointed out to start with, but it would have spoiled things putting Descartes before the horse.

 

FOIA

 

Grim Reaper Halloween GIF

  • Haha 4
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I’ve just spent £300 on a limousine then discovered the fee doesn’t include a driver.  
 

Can’t believe I’ve spent all that money and nothing to chauffeur it. 

  • Haha 5
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43 minutes ago, Toonpack said:

Horse walks into a bar and the barman says "wow, you again, you're in here an awful lot, do you think you could be an alcoholic ?"

 

The horse says "I think I am..." And suddenly just disappears.

 

This joke is a play on Descartes philosophical "I think therefore I am" which I could have pointed out to start with, but it would have spoiled things putting Descartes before the horse.

 

FOIA

IMG_4022.gif.55a40c79dee284aabfd756a95ad280c4.gif

  • Haha 1
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10 minutes ago, trophyshy said:

I’ve just spent £300 on a limousine then discovered the fee doesn’t include a driver.  
 

Can’t believe I’ve spent all that money and nothing to chauffeur it. 

IMG_3964.gif.13bb7dc7c0faac0fee5b2208dd96a6ca.gif

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7 hours ago, Toonpack said:

Horse walks into a bar and the barman says "wow, you again, you're in here an awful lot, do you think you could be an alcoholic ?"

 

The horse says "I think I am..." And suddenly just disappears.

 

This joke is a play on Descartes philosophical "I think therefore I am" which I could have pointed out to start with, but it would have spoiled things putting Descartes before the horse.

 

FOIA

Not Funny Smh GIF

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6 hours ago, trophyshy said:

I’ve just spent £300 on a limousine then discovered the fee doesn’t include a driver.  
 

Can’t believe I’ve spent all that money and nothing to chauffeur it. 

car crash GIF

  • Haha 2
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