Player Ratings

[Ketsbaia 0]

Given 8 - Kept us in it in the first half

Ramage 7 - Showed tonnes of effort but I feel he lacks ability to be top class

Boumsong 4 - Back off, back off, back off, back off.....

Elliot 3 - Anonymous until the dubious penalty

N'Zogbia 5 - Got forward and left us a bit thin at the back a few times

Solano 5 - Doesn't look himself

Emre 5 - Brightened up in the second half 'till he got injured but wasn't there at all in the first

Parker 6 - The 'protector of the back four' looked half decent

Bowyer 3 - Didn't see him do anything

Luque 5 - Pace, finishing and skill - All words that didn't apply to him in the first half. A little brighter in the second until he was subbed

Shearer 4 - Should let players who can clear a wall take the freekicks

 

SUBS

Chopra 5 - Showed some fight

Brittain 4 - Better than Bowyer but not by a lot

Faye 3 - I can't remember if he did anything to deserve such a low rating but the sense of dread that fills me when I see him go anywhere near the ball means he deserves this mark.

 

Souness 0 - What does he say to the players? "Och, alright lads your a fine bunch of skillfull footballers so I want you to lump it to Alan at any oppourtunity and pass it off the shins of the Wigan players if yee cannae hoof it"

[Holden McGroin 6783]

Given 8 - Kept us in it in the first half

Ramage 7 - Showed tonnes of effort but I feel he lacks ability to be top class

Boumsong 4 - Back off, back off, back off, back off.....

Elliot 3 - Anonymous until the dubious penalty

N'Zogbia 5 - Got forward and left us a bit thin at the back a few times

Solano 5 - Doesn't look himself

Emre 5 - Brightened up in the second half 'till he got injured but wasn't there at all in the first

Parker 6 - The 'protector of the back four' looked half decent

Bowyer 3 - Didn't see him do anything

Luque 5 - Pace, finishing and skill - All words that didn't apply to him in the first half. A little brighter in the second until he was subbed

Shearer 4 - Should let players who can clear a wall take the freekicks

 

SUBS

Chopra 5 - Showed some fight

Brittain 4 - Better than Bowyer but not by a lot

Faye 3 - I can't remember if he did anything to deserve such a low rating but the sense of dread that fills me when I see him go anywhere near the ball means he deserves this mark.

 

Souness 0 - What does he say to the players? "Och, alright lads your a fine bunch of skillfull footballers so I want you to lump it to Alan at any oppourtunity and pass it off the shins of the Wigan players if yee cannae hoof it"

63158[/snapback]

 

 

About right..although Elliott gets a 5 for me. Didnt do too much wrong (apart from dubious penna). The defence was badly exposed by a disorganised midfield and a headless chicken at left back.

Edited November 30, 2005 by Holden McGroin

[Mark 0]

Given - 8

Ramage - 8

Zog - 8

Boum - 10

Elliott - 9.5

Parker - 7

Emre - 8

Solano - 10

Bowyer - 9

Brittain - 9

Faye - 7

Luque - 10

Shearer- 1

 

tbh

[Holden McGroin 6783]

Given - 8

Ramage - 8

Zog - 8

Boum - 10

Elliott - 9.5

Parker - 7

Emre - 8

Solano - 10

Bowyer - 9

Brittain - 9

Faye - 7

Luque - 10

Shearer- 1

 

tbh

63162[/snapback]

 

I wish I lived in a magical, happy world like Mark.

[Dr Kenneth Noisewater 0]

Given - 8

Ramage - 8

Zog - 8

Boum - 10

Elliott - 9.5

Parker - 7

Emre - 8

Solano - 10

Bowyer - 9

Brittain - 9

Faye - 7

Luque - 10

Shearer- 1

 

tbh

63162[/snapback]

 

I wish I lived in a magical, happy world like Mark.

63174[/snapback]

 

Must have had four and a half bottles of Breezer again.

[Mark 0]

Given - 8

Ramage - 8

Zog - 8

Boum - 10

Elliott - 9.5

Parker - 7

Emre - 8

Solano - 10

Bowyer - 9

Brittain - 9

Faye - 7

Luque - 10

Shearer- 1

 

tbh

63162[/snapback]

 

I wish I lived in a magical, happy world like Mark.

63174[/snapback]

 

Must have had four and a half bottles of Breezer again.

63181[/snapback]

 

WKD tbh

[Django Reinhardt 0]

I'm so miffed over the performance I've decided to rate them not according to the quality of their performances but the to quality of their haircuts.

 

Given - 6 - Always neat and tidy, suits the squareness of the face. A slightly above average effort.

Ramage - 5 - Quite closely cropped and not dissimilar to Shay's. It's a shame but I've had to knock off a point in that I doubt any haircut would improve the overall unattractiveness.

Elliot - 7 - A bit more of a fringe gives that slightly windswept effect. Looks like a soldier who's had his helmet knocked off by a stray piece of shrapnel. His gormless expression doesn't betray the lie.

Boumsong - 3 - A shite defender who's an absolute liability to his teammates. What Souness was thinking when he wasted eight million on this joker only himself and the Rangers chairman know. Piss poor.

N'Zogbia - 6 - Grown out the crew cut and now approaches mini afro status. Not a bad effort.

Solano - 7 - 50s schoolboy haircut serves him well with that lovely shiny slickness that those mediterranean types often have.

Emre - 8 - Thick and healthy ploomage, looks like a minature Tony Danza. Perhaps the best of the bunch.

Parker - 6 - Strictly short back and sides for Scott, I'll wager his hair now is identical to that in his primary school class photo. Steady.

Bowyer - 5 - Spiked up, receding. Not a great deal to be said. Mousey coloured. Junior Alan.

Luque - 9 - A marvel of opacity, his head could glowing a radioactive green and we'd never know. Impressive.

Shearer - 4 - Bald. No styling possible it's just a case of preservation. His participation has been reduced to a careful comb now and again.

 

The subs all get 5 since I've rapidly become bored with the whole concept and my ire is no longer sufficient to fuel my fingers.

Edited November 30, 2005 by Django Reinhardt

[Isegrim 9897]

I'm so miffed over the performance I've decided to rate them not according to the quality of their performances but the to quality of their haircuts.

 

Given - 6 - Always neat and tidy, suits the squareness of the face. A slightly above average effort.

Ramage - 5 - Quite closely cropped and not dissimilar to Shay's. It's a shame but I've had to knock off a point in that I doubt any haircut would improve the overall unattractiveness.

Elliot - 7 - A bit more of a fringe gives that slightly windswept effect. Looks like a soldier who's had his helmet knocked off by a stray piece of shrapnel. His gormless expression doesn't betray the lie.

Boumsong - 3 - A shite defender who's an absolute liability to his teammates. What Souness was thinking when he wasted eight million on this joker only himself and the Rangers chairman know. Piss poor.

N'Zogbia - 6 - Grown out the crew cut and now approaches mini afro status. Not a bad effort.

Solano - 7 - 50s schoolboy haircut serves him well with that lovely shiny slickness that those mediterranean types often have.

Emre - 8 - Thick and healthy ploomage, looks like a minature Tony Danza. Perhaps the best of the bunch.

Parker - 6 - Strictly short back and sides for Scott, I'll wager his hair now is identical to that in his primary school class photo. Steady.

Bowyer - 5 - Spiked up, receding. Not a great deal to be said. Mousey coloured. Junior Alan.

Luque - 9 - A marvel of opacity, his head could glowing a radioactive green and we'd never know. Impressive.

Shearer - 4 - Bald. No styling possible it's just a case of preservation. His participation has been reduced to a careful comb now and again.

 

The subs all get 5 since I've rapidly become bored with the whole concept and my ire is no longer sufficient to fuel my fingers.

63189[/snapback]

 

Well at least I now go to bed smiling...

[Dr Kenneth Noisewater 0]

I'm so miffed over the performance I've decided to rate them not according to the quality of their performances but the to quality of their haircuts.

 

Given - 6 - Always neat and tidy, suits the squareness of the face. A slightly above average effort.

Ramage - 5 - Quite closely cropped and not dissimilar to Shay's. It's a shame but I've had to knock off a point in that I doubt any haircut would improve the overall unattractiveness.

Elliot - 7 - A bit more of a fringe gives that slightly windswept effect. Looks like a soldier who's had his helmet knocked off by a stray piece of shrapnel. His gormless expression doesn't betray the lie.

Boumsong - 3 - A shite defender who's an absolute liability to his teammates. What Souness was thinking when he wasted eight million on this joker only himself and the Rangers chairman know. Piss poor.

N'Zogbia - 6 - Grown out the crew cut and now approaches mini afro status. Not a bad effort.

Solano - 7 - 50s schoolboy haircut serves him well with that lovely shiny slickness that those mediterranean types often have.

Emre - 8 - Thick and healthy ploomage, looks like a minature Tony Danza. Perhaps the best of the bunch.

Parker - 6 - Strictly short back and sides for Scott, I'll wager his hair now is identical to that in his primary school class photo. Steady.

Bowyer - 5 - Spiked up, receding. Not a great deal to be said. Mousey coloured. Junior Alan.

Luque - 9 - A marvel of opacity, his head could glowing a radioactive green and we'd never know. Impressive.

Shearer - 4 - Bald. No styling possible it's just a case of preservation. His participation has been reduced to a careful comb now and again.

 

The subs all get 5 since I've rapidly become bored with the whole concept and my ire is no longer sufficient to fuel my fingers.

63189[/snapback]

thats up there with the old Andy RATINGS.

[Jimbo 175]

Given 8

 

the rest 0

 

I've never felt so let down before, and thats saying something !

 

Souness should be dragged out of Newcastle by his hair !

[sammynb 3508]

Souness should be dragged out of Newcastle by his hair !

63203[/snapback]

 

Continuing Django Reinhardt's ratings:

 

Souness - Dumb arse, fucking useless, sophicticated sweep which is greying around the edges.

Not so much a hair style but a disguise so the footballing world doesn't realise this man is a useless cock. Unlike our chariman and the fooballing media that continues to support this dick, we, Newcastle's supporters, all know that placing a tie around it and a toupee on the end doesn't change him from being a worthless penis.