Retro review

[Howmanheyman 33820]

Ayresome Park

 

Make your way to Newcastle Central Station, there you will find a 'football special' train service arranged to take you the thirty odd miles south to Thornaby station, just outside of the 'Boro', once at Thornaby station you will be met by some helpful local men from a group known as the 'Cleveland Police force', here they will meet and greet you with a late 'Champagne breakfast', (this is because the game will be at a twelve noon).

 

After introducing themselves and their cute pets, (lovely Alsatians), and inquiring if you had a pleasant trip, they will then arrange for you to be transported from the station to Ayresome park by a fleet of local buses, they will then take you on a small tour of Teeside where you will be in no rush to get to the stadium, you may find the Chemical plant of particular interest, on approaching Ayresome park, you will drive through a housing estate, don't miss the opportunity to wave at the families gathered at their windows waving and smiling at you, you can't miss them, Mams, dads and young infants in vests and knickers standing on the windowsill's with smiling, happy faces.

 

On arrival at Ayresome Park, you will be helpfully escorted from your bus by the lovely 'Cleveland police' and their cute little puppies, at the turnstile, you will be admitted into the ground by an elderly local employee of Middlesbrough FC who has been thoroughly trained to NVQ level on how to efficiently get as many people into a ground as fast and safely as is possible, he will obviously wish you all the best for the game and may the best team win.

 

Once inside the stadium, you will be chaperoned by more of the lovely police and puppies and they will keep an eye on you to make sure you're ok and everything is to your comfort, at the end of the game they will let you have a twenty minute rest, before escorting you back to your bus which will then again take you through the estate, be sure to remember to wave goodbye to the families wishing you a fond farewell, when you arrive at Thornaby Station you will then have punch at the station whilst you await your carriage back to civilization Newcastle.

[shackbleep 0]

Jesus what a shit-hole of a ground that was. Went there twice. 2 times too many IMO.

[PaddockLad 17642]

If you go back to the days of the 12 o'clock kick offs it was always far scarier going there than going to the village of the damned for me....worst time was an evening game

in the league cup around the time Keegan was first here....big lumps of concrete being hoyed over into our bit

[Tooj 17]

[Guest Tuco Ramirez]

Jesus what a shit-hole of a ground that was. Went there twice. 2 times too many IMO.

We nearly always played shite there as well. In fact the most shocked I've ever been about any NUFC result was when we won 3-1 in the league cup in 1992, I think that was the first time we won at Boro in my life time.

[NJS 4411]

Jesus what a shit-hole of a ground that was. Went there twice. 2 times too many IMO.

We nearly always played shite there as well. In fact the most shocked I've ever been about any NUFC result was when we won 3-1 in the league cup in 1992, I think that was the first time we won at Boro in my life time.

 

What was good about that was it was right on the cusp of us becoming a good team imo - I remember That twat Page trying to be clever saying "half time will be 15 minutes as that's what we use in the premier as opposed to the lower leagues" - that made us absolutely destroying the bastards all the sweeter.