Howmanheyman 33173 Posted April 26, 2015 Share Posted April 26, 2015 Face Newcastle United press corps? I'd rather go to the dentist, jokes John Carver 16:31, 24 April 2015 By Lee Ryder John Carver remains upbeat despite the criticism coming his way after Newcastle United's record run of Premier League losses John Carver tried to lighten the mood at Newcastle United’s weekly Press conference by joking he was looking forward to a trip to the dentist more than facing the Tyneside media corps this week. Carver has had plenty of stick since being appointed as head coach back in January, with even those journalists who report on his comments sometimes accused of backing the man who has won just twice in 2015. :lol: J'accuse, Lee! Fucking J'accuse!! (It's French, Lee). Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Howmanheyman 33173 Posted April 26, 2015 Share Posted April 26, 2015 I've noticed that Lee LOVES using a word in caps. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Howmanheyman 33173 Posted April 26, 2015 Share Posted April 26, 2015 (edited) John Carver feels that the return of key players can help Newcastle turn the corner 06:30, 25 April 2015 By Lee Ryder After a torrid spate of injuries at Newcastle United, John Carver is ready to reintroduce three players in the next week or so John Carver feels his Newcastle team are beyond their lowest point. "John Carver feels his Newcastle team are beyond their lowest point." Edited April 26, 2015 by Howmanheyman Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ayatollah Hermione 13863 Posted April 26, 2015 Share Posted April 26, 2015 Also, Ryder is always using the injury line as a means of defence for Carver but why does he never question the number of injures? As in, what the fucking hell are they doing in training to get so many of them? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gemmill 44853 Posted April 26, 2015 Share Posted April 26, 2015 (edited) "John Carver feels his Newcastle team are beyond their lowest point." "I have successfully guided the club to rock bottom. We intend to spend some time here, taking in the sights." I assume he means in the sense that when you've lost 7 games in a row, what's another defeat between friends? Edited April 26, 2015 by Gemmill Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
StoneColdStephenIreland 74 Posted April 27, 2015 Share Posted April 27, 2015 (edited) This Newcastle United team are the worst in the club's Premier League history http://t.co/mbZX9hTRPT #NUFC #northeast http://t.co/M5YVIMYVzn It's still everyone else's fault but not Carvers apparently. Edit. http://www.chroniclelive.co.uk/sport/football/football-news/newcastle-united-team-worst-clubs-9124806 Edited April 27, 2015 by StoneColdStephenIreland Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JaMoUsE 0 Posted April 27, 2015 Share Posted April 27, 2015 (edited) The players are shit. Mostly championship standard. But Carver made a rod for his own back in January when he said he was happy with the squad and happy letting Santon leave and supported the decision for mbiwa to leave. Edited April 27, 2015 by JaMoUsE Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sonatine 11374 Posted April 27, 2015 Share Posted April 27, 2015 The players are shit. Mostly championship standard. But Carver made a rod for his own back in January when he said he was happy with the squad and happy letting Santon leave and supported the decision for mbiwa to leave. More than happy to badmouth Santon a few weeks ago as well. I fail to have too much sympathy for Charver tbh, he's just Pardew without the (limited) ability and smarm. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Fish 10856 Posted April 28, 2015 Share Posted April 28, 2015 How is this horseshit acceptable? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
David Kelly 1245 Posted April 28, 2015 Share Posted April 28, 2015 Why would anyone ask Ryder his opinion on anything much less that? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Fish 10856 Posted April 28, 2015 Share Posted April 28, 2015 Why would anyone ask Ryder his opinion on anything much less that? No idea but, I could ask him? for the giggles? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
David Kelly 1245 Posted April 28, 2015 Share Posted April 28, 2015 No idea but, I could ask him? for the giggles? Go for it. From the answer he gives above it must just be some automatically generated answer mind! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ayatollah Hermione 13863 Posted April 28, 2015 Share Posted April 28, 2015 Love how he completely ignores the manager question because he doesn't want to outright admit he's pulling for his mate to get it Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ewerk 30598 Posted April 29, 2015 Share Posted April 29, 2015 http://www.chroniclelive.co.uk/sport/football/football-news/jurgen-klopp-still-without-club-9146719 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gemmill 44853 Posted April 29, 2015 Share Posted April 29, 2015 He would get laughed off any NUFC forum with that patter, and he's picking up a fucking wage for writing it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Howay 12496 Posted April 30, 2015 Share Posted April 30, 2015 He's fucking incredible, he probably thought he was being all cultured when he wrote that seeing that he spelt Klopp right. Did he bring up that he saw Dortmund play? I didn't bother reading much of the article as I dont want a headache but I'd be shocked if he could resist bragging. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kid Dynamite 7025 Posted May 1, 2015 Share Posted May 1, 2015 http://www.chroniclelive.co.uk/sport/football/football-news/can-john-carver-ever-win-9160306 Chief sports writer He struggles to write in sentences ffs Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
David Kelly 1245 Posted May 1, 2015 Share Posted May 1, 2015 "I never thought back in 1991 that I would end up speaking to him as a journalist while he was manager of Newcastle United!" I don't think anyone would have ever thought that of either of you two fuckwits Lee! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
StoneColdStephenIreland 74 Posted May 1, 2015 Share Posted May 1, 2015 He wrote it like a love letter to his dearest John. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gemmill 44853 Posted May 1, 2015 Share Posted May 1, 2015 But those who know Carver, and I guess the same goes for the two lads who went to the training ground today, quickly realise he is a football man who cares deeply about Newcastle United. Is that enough to be a success at Newcastle? Maybe not. :lol: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Howmanheyman 33173 Posted May 1, 2015 Share Posted May 1, 2015 I give up. lads, I just can't beat any of that shit. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Howay 12496 Posted May 1, 2015 Share Posted May 1, 2015 (edited) a squad that- in my opinion - I dont deem fit for purpose in the Premier League That's fucking brilliant, simply saying "a squad that I don't deem fit for purpose" would be enough, the "in my opinion" is completely redundant. Does he proofread? I stopped reading after that as I'm sure that's not the worst of it. Edited May 1, 2015 by Howay Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kid Dynamite 7025 Posted May 1, 2015 Share Posted May 1, 2015 Yeah I lol'ed at that bit too. I'm sure he just writes what's in his head and presses 'publish' sometimes, with about as much thought as goes into posting a message on here Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ayatollah Hermione 13863 Posted May 1, 2015 Share Posted May 1, 2015 a squad that- in my opinion - I dont deem fit for purpose in the Premier League That's fucking brilliant, simply saying "a squad that I don't deem fit for purpose" would be enough, the "in my opinion" is completely redundant. Does he proofread? I stopped reading after that as I'm sure that's not the worst of it. reminds me of Tony Parsehole in The Viz. "Oh, still got 100 words left. The princess looked really, really, really, really, indescribably, beautiful. She really, really, really did" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dr Gloom 21915 Posted May 1, 2015 Share Posted May 1, 2015 Indeed, between chief scout Graham Carr, managing director Lee Charnley and owner Mike Ashley they will decide on what happens next. Appalling number of wasted words Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts
Create an account or sign in to comment
You need to be a member in order to leave a comment
Create an account
Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!
Register a new accountSign in
Already have an account? Sign in here.
Sign In Now