Gemmill 42458 Posted August 22 Share Posted August 22 Sorry to hear that Strawb. Poor bloke sounds like he's been dealt a very shitty hand by life. I hope your mam is OK, and you too. 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Meenzer 15094 Posted August 22 Share Posted August 22 All the best mate. Not sure there's much useful any of us can say other than to hope it goes as smoothly and painlessly as it can for him and for all of you. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Renton 20356 Posted August 22 Share Posted August 22 Nothing I can say, any of us can, that will really help. I guess except to say expect yourself to have upsetting mood swings, maybe have unwanted intrusive thoughts, and expect these at the moments you don't expect them. Possibly for a long time. Be kind to yourself and loved ones. As always, you can talk about it as much or as little as you want on this place, we're a community of fellow dick heads. Take care. 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dr Gloom 21245 Posted August 22 Share Posted August 22 (edited) My mother-in-law lost her protracted battle with cancer a couple of weeks back and it upended our summer. It’s my first experience seeing this fucking devastating and intolerable disease up close. It’s every but as brutal and cruel as you imagine. Solidarity to anyone who has been through this. I expect most of you have lost a loved one to it given it kills one in two of us these days. Grief is a weird thing. I didn’t expect it to hit me so hard. I’ve lost all my grandparents but this hurts more because they were all old and she was just 69. A good mate of mine who lost both parents young put it quite well - the pain never goes away. The world just eventually begins to grow around it and life moves forwards. It has to. Edited August 22 by Dr Gloom 4 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Howmanheyman 31434 Posted August 22 Share Posted August 22 Basically what everyone else has said. Hopefully you all have the support you're all going to need from each other in the coming weeks and months. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Renton 20356 Posted August 22 Share Posted August 22 7 minutes ago, Dr Gloom said: My mother-in-law lost her protracted battle with cancer a couple of weeks back and it upended our summer. It’s my first experience seeing this fucking devastating and intolerable disease up close. It’s every but as brutal and cruel as you imagine. Solidarity to anyone who has been through this. I expect most of you have lost a loved one to it given it kills one in two of us these days. Grief is a weird thing. I didn’t expect it to hit me so hard. I’ve lost all my grandparents but this hurts more because they were all old and she was just 69. A good mate of mine who lost both parents young put it quite well - the pain never goes away. The world just eventually begins to grow around it and life moves forwards. It has to. Aye, that's true. For me personally, the pain gets worse with time and I never, ever expected that. But then you continue living, just live with the pain, get used to it. ALmost like a chronic nagging physical pain. Sibling death, especially at a relatively young age, is very hard I think. For most of us, your sibling should be the longest close relationship you have, so to lose that is tough. And obviously devestating for the parent(s), so the surviving sibling(s) need to cope with that too. There are no answers I'm afraid. Just have to be honest with yourself and get through it. Everybody is different and copes in their own way. 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
wykikitoon 19264 Posted August 22 Share Posted August 22 Ah strawb man All the best pal. Sounds like you're in an alright place mentally with it, but you know us bunch of loons are always available if not and I hope your mam is right too. 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Toonpack 8643 Posted August 22 Share Posted August 22 Nothing really anyone can say tbh, hope you are as OK as can be Strawb (and your mam) 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dr Gloom 21245 Posted August 22 Share Posted August 22 1 hour ago, strawb said: Some of you will know my brother had a brain haemorrhage 13 years ago, he has been semi vegetative since and susceptible to infections. Well has had a chest infection that he couldn’t shift and now has sepsis and is on end of life care. I’m weirdly zen about the whole thing, I’m sat next to him in hospital and he seems calm. Worried about how it will affect my mam though, especially since we lost my dad a couple of years ago. Really sorry to hear of this. Life can be very cruel 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Fish 10404 Posted August 22 Share Posted August 22 2 hours ago, strawb said: Some of you will know my brother had a brain haemorrhage 13 years ago, he has been semi vegetative since and susceptible to infections. Well has had a chest infection that he couldn’t shift and now has sepsis and is on end of life care. I’m weirdly zen about the whole thing, I’m sat next to him in hospital and he seems calm. Worried about how it will affect my mam though, especially since we lost my dad a couple of years ago. Sorry to hear that mate. Like everyone has said, if you need to vent, here's a good place to do it. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kevin Carr's Gloves 3693 Posted August 22 Share Posted August 22 Strawb man that’s awful, thoughts with you mate.😪 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RobinRobin 10656 Posted August 23 Share Posted August 23 Sorry Strawb. All the best. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
strawb 4067 Posted August 30 Share Posted August 30 On 22/08/2024 at 13:54, strawb said: Some of you will know my brother had a brain haemorrhage 13 years ago, he has been semi vegetative since and susceptible to infections. Well has had a chest infection that he couldn’t shift and now has sepsis and is on end of life care. I’m weirdly zen about the whole thing, I’m sat next to him in hospital and he seems calm. Worried about how it will affect my mam though, especially since we lost my dad a couple of years ago. Well this has been a cluster fuck of epic proportions. We were told day one he has sepsis, and there was nothing they could do. We agree that he should be put on end of life care and tried coming to terms with it. The next day a different consultant said during rounds “ah the antibiotics seem to be working, let’s get him some more and send him home”. He had not had any antibiotics, as he was on end of life care.. so we disagreed. He was moved wards to free a bed, and another new consultant sat us both down and told us he was happy to treat him again but it was unlikely to work and we should prepare ourselves that he might not make it. So he was taken off end of life care, and has been treated with antibiotics for the last 2 days. They finally got his bloods back yesterday and he is recovering.. I don’t claim to be medically trained in anyway whatsoever, but do doctors not talk to each other/read notes on patients? My mam is nearly 70, and has been told twice this week by separate consultants that her first born is going to die when all he seemingly needed was some antibiotics. Also trying to sleep in a hospital chair for days on end has fucked my back, on the plus side I’m sat outside james cook now (4.45am) and it’s the first time I’ve not seen any smack heads around here all week. Swings and roundabouts. 7 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Howmanheyman 31434 Posted August 30 Share Posted August 30 2 hours ago, strawb said: Well this has been a cluster fuck of epic proportions. We were told day one he has sepsis, and there was nothing they could do. We agree that he should be put on end of life care and tried coming to terms with it. The next day a different consultant said during rounds “ah the antibiotics seem to be working, let’s get him some more and send him home”. He had not had any antibiotics, as he was on end of life care.. so we disagreed. He was moved wards to free a bed, and another new consultant sat us both down and told us he was happy to treat him again but it was unlikely to work and we should prepare ourselves that he might not make it. So he was taken off end of life care, and has been treated with antibiotics for the last 2 days. They finally got his bloods back yesterday and he is recovering.. I don’t claim to be medically trained in anyway whatsoever, but do doctors not talk to each other/read notes on patients? My mam is nearly 70, and has been told twice this week by separate consultants that her first born is going to die when all he seemingly needed was some antibiotics. Also trying to sleep in a hospital chair for days on end has fucked my back, on the plus side I’m sat outside james cook now (4.45am) and it’s the first time I’ve not seen any smack heads around here all week. Swings and roundabouts. Fucking hell, I've seen stuff like this before but not that degree and outcome. Your head and your Mam's must be all over the place. 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gemmill 42458 Posted August 30 Share Posted August 30 Aye, good outcome but a shite way to get there. Hope your mam's OK. 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PaddockLad 16474 Posted August 30 Share Posted August 30 Sorry to hear of your troubles Strawb, awful for you all to be dicked about. 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sammynb 3123 Posted August 30 Share Posted August 30 @strawb hope everything works out, look after your mum and yourself. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Renton 20356 Posted August 30 Share Posted August 30 (edited) Horrible, sorry mate. I had Hobsons choice with my Dad of having his leg amputated to give him some more time, or let nature take its course. It was all thrust on me despite me not having LPA. I chose the latter but the death took months. And you get no psychological support. It's really damaged my MH as testified on here but there you are. Take care. Don't blame the clinicians. There is inherent uncertainty in all of this. Hope he recovers. Edited August 30 by Renton 4 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Monkeys Fist 41272 Posted August 31 Share Posted August 31 Sorry to hear this @strawb mate- I can’t imagine how you or your Mam are feeling. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
wykikitoon 19264 Posted August 31 Share Posted August 31 Aye strawb it's shite man 😢 look after your mam pal. My wife's mates had a shit time recently. Her nephew was diagnosed with schizophrenia recently. He's fed using to take his meds. Anyways midweek he turned up at home with a fucking machete. Night after he tried attacking his mam (not with the machete thank fuck). Tonight he's finally been taken into hospital. Seems so shit that those who are having shite just get shite on shite. Anyways. Tell your loved ones you love em more often. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dr Gloom 21245 Posted September 2 Share Posted September 2 Just back from my mother in law’s wake. I’m in pieces. I won’t lie. A truly wonderful woman gone far too soon 12 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gemmill 42458 Posted September 3 Share Posted September 3 Sorry to hear your news Gloomy, hope you and the family are OK after yesterday. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kevin Carr's Gloves 3693 Posted September 3 Share Posted September 3 Sorry to hear that Gloomy man, deepest condolences bud. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
wykikitoon 19264 Posted September 3 Share Posted September 3 Sorry Gloomy man. Hope you're feeling a little better today pal. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Fish 10404 Posted September 3 Share Posted September 3 Sorry to hear that Gloomy. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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