strawb 4251 Posted June 5, 2019 Share Posted June 5, 2019 7 hours ago, Monkeys Fist said: Got a start offshore this Friday. Just a week for the first trip, out of Aberdeen, for Global Energy Group. Buzzing Do you know which rig you are on mate? I might be able to give you a few names for a few faces 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Monkeys Fist 42449 Posted June 5, 2019 Share Posted June 5, 2019 Apparently the Northern Producer? I’m grinding my way through an interminable set of seemingly never ending online induction courses right now, but I gather that’s the best training for the offshore experience Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
strawb 4251 Posted June 5, 2019 Share Posted June 5, 2019 Depends. It won’t prepare you for getting into a warm bunk after a 20 clem jock, but if you are on a floatel it will probably cover the basics. Apart from the amount of porn. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
strawb 4251 Posted June 5, 2019 Share Posted June 5, 2019 Oh and I will ask around about the NP mate 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Monkeys Fist 42449 Posted June 5, 2019 Share Posted June 5, 2019 Are we talking old school porn- i.e. actual mags? I gather the Northern Producer is relatively small as rigs go, but that link rates it fairly well as far as conditions etc. I think I’ve to get a plane from Aberdeen to Sullum Voe, then chopper to the rig. Whoopee Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
strawb 4251 Posted June 5, 2019 Share Posted June 5, 2019 Every denomination of porn mate. Any and all mediums. Its north of Shetland then? Honestly not heard of it but will ask around, assuming it’s on the thistle field? 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Renton 21626 Posted June 5, 2019 Share Posted June 5, 2019 17 minutes ago, strawb said: Every denomination of porn mate. Any and all mediums. Its north of Shetland then? Honestly not heard of it but will ask around, assuming it’s on the thistle field? Dons field apparently. Watch out for Big Don, aka Ding or King. Homestly MF, I'm nervous for you. And what's this? Rig Advisor! https://rigadvisor.co.uk/northernproducer/ 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Monkeys Fist 42449 Posted June 5, 2019 Share Posted June 5, 2019 Renton, just imagine how many fucking seagulls there’ll be. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Monkeys Fist 42449 Posted June 7, 2019 Share Posted June 7, 2019 Flying out at 12:00pm. Arse is like a goldfish’s gob. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Monkeys Fist 42449 Posted June 7, 2019 Share Posted June 7, 2019 This is apparently the rig I’m going too 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dr Gloom 21924 Posted June 7, 2019 Share Posted June 7, 2019 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
wykikitoon 20146 Posted June 7, 2019 Share Posted June 7, 2019 Been nice knowing you kid RIP 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TheGingerQuiff 2412 Posted June 7, 2019 Share Posted June 7, 2019 God himself could not sink that rig Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Monkeys Fist 42449 Posted June 7, 2019 Share Posted June 7, 2019 I’m on it now. It’s fucking older than me Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ayatollah Hermione 13869 Posted June 8, 2019 Share Posted June 8, 2019 Get a grip, you silly bastard. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TheGingerQuiff 2412 Posted June 8, 2019 Share Posted June 8, 2019 Northern producer will flounder Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Monkeys Fist 42449 Posted June 8, 2019 Share Posted June 8, 2019 Not now, I’m here to fix it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Monkeys Fist 42449 Posted July 3, 2019 Share Posted July 3, 2019 Off for three weeks to the Heather platform in an hour. 2nd trip and I’m running the ropes show. Shiting it Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Fish 10857 Posted August 3, 2019 Share Posted August 3, 2019 Knackered. Son was born June 27th. Mrs Fish had 28hrs labour before ending up with a c-section because little man was in the wrong position and wasn't so little. Born at 01:57 am, weighing a hefty 10lbs (4.5kg). All fine and dandy, however the hospital boots people out at midnight, so we finally get down to the ward at about 4, and the midwife immediately tells me I have to leave. Normal birth that might not have been a problem, but Mrs Fish had been in hospital since 8am Monday, had been nil-by-mouth since tuesday night and hadn't slept properly in days. She could barely sit up, let alone pick up the chunky little bugger. Other parents from the Antenatal group said the partners were allowed to stay overnight in the other hospital we were considering. Anyway, he's mint, got the first couple of proper smiles last night. 4 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ewerk 30611 Posted August 3, 2019 Share Posted August 3, 2019 Glad to hear that everything including the wife’s vag is okay. 4 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Monkeys Fist 42449 Posted August 3, 2019 Share Posted August 3, 2019 Congrats on the Tiddler, Mr & Mrs. Fish. Just remember, when the two of you are bouncing crockery off each other and craving just five fucking minutes of sweet, sweet sleep, it’s your own fault- you could’ve just spaffed on her tiddies. Welcome to fatherhood Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TheGingerQuiff 2412 Posted August 3, 2019 Share Posted August 3, 2019 Get some powdered milk in, in case he's like his barrel-emptying fatha 4 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dr Gloom 21924 Posted August 4, 2019 Share Posted August 4, 2019 Congrats Fish! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Anorthernsoul 1221 Posted August 4, 2019 Share Posted August 4, 2019 On 03/08/2019 at 21:24, The Fish said: Knackered. Son was born June 27th. Mrs Fish had 28hrs labour before ending up with a c-section because little man was in the wrong position and wasn't so little. Born at 01:57 am, weighing a hefty 10lbs (4.5kg). All fine and dandy, however the hospital boots people out at midnight, so we finally get down to the ward at about 4, and the midwife immediately tells me I have to leave. Normal birth that might not have been a problem, but Mrs Fish had been in hospital since 8am Monday, had been nil-by-mouth since tuesday night and hadn't slept properly in days. She could barely sit up, let alone pick up the chunky little bugger. Other parents from the Antenatal group said the partners were allowed to stay overnight in the other hospital we were considering. Anyway, he's mint, got the first couple of proper smiles last night. Congratulations mate. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PaddockLad 17262 Posted August 4, 2019 Share Posted August 4, 2019 Mr & Mrs Fish & young smolt Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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