Club statement

[acrossthepond 878]

Press Release should have been.

 

1. We thank CH for all his efforts but we will be approaching a number of candidates inc Roy for the job over the coming weeks.

2. With the windfall PL money we will secure PL survival.

3. Keep on keeping on.

 

 

END.

Aye or....

 

1. The board would like to set on record that Mike is indeed a fat cunt, who got lucky early in his life, and couldn't spell obese without using an a till 1994 the thick cunt.

2. The board would like to acknowledge that whilst not only looking like a child molester, Derek Llambias is fully advocates the assertion he is an arsehole and someone with worse communication skills than Steve Hawking when the battery runs out.

3. Will some fuckin arab buy us out for fuck sake.

4. Even a yank, or FFS would do.

 

:(

 

About the only thing worth laughing at in this thread. Once again we've been properly fucked about and no mistake.

[Jusoda Kid 1]

This our only hope:

 

 

[ewerk 31221]

 

[Happy Face 29]

Given the situation, and the fact that Newcastle United have continually been misrepresented by the national media over the past decade.

 

 

I think I was too angry to notice this before.

 

The nerve.

 

Who'd a thunk if you tell the press lies, they'll repeat them.

[Happy Face 29]

Caulkin....

 

It was fun while it lasted, but at some stage, the party had to end. After a season of graft and toil, of embracing unity and team-work, of rebuilding ties with supporters, Newcastle have deserved a few weeks of raucous celebration. After years of mismanagement and underachievement, it has been important that fans should be able to attend matches at St James’ Park without dread nestling in the pit of their stomachs.

 

There have been tipsy smiles plastered across people’s faces and it has been fun to witness, but furrowed brows will almost certainly have replaced them today. With the statement they released on Sunday evening and as only they can do, Newcastle have succeeded in increasing confusion while simultaneously attempting “to send out a clear message". Clarity has seldom felt so opaque.

 

Quite what the purpose is of explaining exactly what they won’t be saying in the future - when they’ve never said anything remotely useful in the past - is debatable, but the meat of the statement lies elsewhere. “The first-team squad that won the Championship this year will form the basis of the team for next season in the Premier League,” it said. “There is no plan for new capital outlay on players.”

 

While even this did not break new ground for openness - does “new capital outlay” mean nothing beyond what is already accounted for or absolutely nothing - at least, more or less, Newcastle fans know where they stand: on quicksand. There will be no significant spending, no statement signings, no fantasy football. The effort of this season will have to be redoubled. But they suspected all that anyway.

In the past few weeks, Chris Hughton has spoken about the examples of Wolverhampton Wanderers and Birmingham City, of clubs being promoted to the Premier League, stabilising and surviving. For the time being, that is Newcastle’s ambition, too.

 

In some ways, there is nothing wrong with that, because arrogance was institutionalised in their boardroom long before Mike Ashley’s arrival and they could do with growing organically rather than frittering away fortunes on ego-driven transfers, but isn’t even that limited goal undermined by a reluctance to spend anything? Is Ashley saying that Newcastle will be the new West Bromwich Albion, solvent bed-hoppers between the divisions? Or, if not, isn’t he risking that?

 

A focus on their academy structure is also welcome, but these things do not blossom overnight and guff about the “Geordie nation” is just that: guff. As nufc.com, the respected independent website, put it: “Academy talent given squad numbers in the 2009/10 season included only a few locally-born players with most bought in from outside the region. Even the U18s squad that reached the semi-final of the FA Youth Cup was mostly made up of non-North Easterners.”

 

The real triumph of the campaign just ended has been the continuing perseverance shown by long-suffering fans with their baffling club, the manner in which Hughton and his players succeeded in coming together in the aftermath of relegation, forging a soaring spirit. The essence of Newcastle’s statement is that more of the same must follow. We’re back in the Premier League, but you’re on your own.

 

http://timesonline.typepad.com/thegame/201...-quicksand.html

[Dr Gloom 22181]

the club is blatantly still up for sale if a buyer comes along

Nah, only if a buyers comes along willing to give him 137M + pay off debt. The cost of the club is well over 200m and no one wil pay that nowadays.

 

it would have to be a mug buyer like. but you can tell from this statment that ashley has zero desire to move the club forwards. doesn't give a monkeys does he.

 

someone needs to make him an offer he can't refuse

Like the last one? Great ©

 

i mean a mug in the sense that someone that is prepared to pay way over the odds, or is happy to write off the debt. but hopefully someone - unlike ashley - whose motivation for running a football club would be to move it forward rather than bleed it dry.

[David Kelly 1260]

We might stay up, we might. I think we can grind out results against shit teams, but we all know we don't have the quality to get results against anyone decent. We might fluke a few home wins against Villa and Everton, above that I can see 0 points from 12 games. We might stay up. It might even be the case we don't go down in the next five years. One thing we're going to do is drift like fuck, exactly like we did from 1984 to 1989, and I wouldn't care we had at least some investment then, we'll just be plain old Newcastle a place with a great stadium, great city, where everyone thinks they can win

 

1996 17 1 1

2003 15 2 2

 

That's on the basis of the current squad we have. After reading this pile of shite can you seriously imagine any of our better players are going to want to stay? The ones who decided to stay and fight this season will just wonder why they ever bothered. And it's going to be a fantastic selling point to players who we are trying to negotiate new contracts with!

 

I live in hope that HF's alternative reading is correct but I don't expect it will be

[Guest Barrack Road]

But fellow fanzine editor Steve Wraith, of Players’ Inc, welcomed the club’s honesty.

 

“It feels like its bursting the promotion bubble but it’s a realistic statement, it’s a short, sharp, shock for fans,” he said. “If Newcastle are relegated in 12 months time no-one could accuse them of leading us up the garden path.

 

“It’s a wake-up call telling us not to get out expectancy levels too high. It’s a heavy dose of reality, which is probably what football supporters need.”

 

 

 

If I hadn't had this misfortune of being in this cunts presence on a few occasion, I wouldn't believe it possible that anyone could be such a cunt. I actually said earlier in the thread, I bet he's been some sly advisory party to the club, and I tell you what it is, the spin he's put on this, I think it's entirely plausible. Oh my god.

Edited May 10, 2010 by Barrack Road

[Phil 6]

I wonder how much money is due in from former player sales and how it figures into this daft statement.

 

Dekka has a way with words.

[Giraffidae 0]

that statement proves yet again, that they really need help in how to run a football club.

 

As a PR point of view, that statement was clearly going to do more harm than good (to the fans, players and coaching staff) — how could they not see it.

 

Not only will are they damaging revenues through season ticket sales, but how do they expect to bring monies in from sponsorship, corporate business? — madness.

 

The use of ‘Geordie this’ and ‘Geordie nation that’ shows exactly what they are — absolute clueless morons.

 

If they are staying on, forget about doing it ‘your way’ Ashley — get someone in who can help you run a football club — NOW.

 

 

To think that the last statement they put out was an attempt to put an end to the Ashley out songs!!!!!!!!!!

[Guest alex]

the club is blatantly still up for sale if a buyer comes along

Nah, only if a buyers comes along willing to give him 137M + pay off debt. The cost of the club is well over 200m and no one wil pay that nowadays.

 

it would have to be a mug buyer like. but you can tell from this statment that ashley has zero desire to move the club forwards. doesn't give a monkeys does he.

 

someone needs to make him an offer he can't refuse

Like the last one? Great ©

 

i mean a mug in the sense that someone that is prepared to pay way over the odds, or is happy to write off the debt. but hopefully someone - unlike ashley - whose motivation for running a football club would be to move it forward rather than bleed it dry.

I knew what you meant but, similar to the way in which Ashley paid over the odds, you'd have to question the nouse of anyone giving him his asking price, no matter how much money they have. Having silly money doesn't really go hand in hand with being daft enough to pay what he wants though, does it?

[Guest alex]

But fellow fanzine editor Steve Wraith, of Players’ Inc, welcomed the club’s honesty.

 

“It feels like its bursting the promotion bubble but it’s a realistic statement, it’s a short, sharp, shock for fans,” he said. “If Newcastle are relegated in 12 months time no-one could accuse them of leading us up the garden path.

 

“It’s a wake-up call telling us not to get out expectancy levels too high. It’s a heavy dose of reality, which is probably what football supporters need.”

 

 

 

If I hadn't had this misfortune of being in this cunts presence on a few occasion, I wouldn't believe it possible that anyone could be such a cunt. I actually said earlier in the thread, I bet he's been some sly advisory party to the club, and I tell you what it is, the spin he's put on this, I think it's entirely plausible. Oh my god.

Aye, if we go down, at least we haven't been led up the garden path. What a weird way of looking at it.

[Howmanheyman 33881]

Well, well, well, get up off night shift and wake up to this fucking nugget of gold from Ashley/Llambias, Christ! First we are to emulate Arsenal, then it's Villa and now we seem to be going down the West Brom route of not spending on players in case we get relegated with an expensive squad and we get into financial difficulties. Just how MA thinks we are going to survive for four to five years in the PL without any kind of investment is simply staggering. What a time to come out with such an announcement, too! Thinking of getting a season ticket? Well here's a statement for you to chew on, you Geordie monkey!

 

So basically, the likes of Wigan, Bolton, Stoke et al, (our nearest competitors!), can spend to strengthen their squads but we will not. Till 2016. What division will we be in on that date, Mike? What happens if we get injuries? What happens if some of our tight knit band of brothers are just not good enough for the PL?

 

If anyone had any inkling that Mike was coming to terms with running this club and was putting his heart into it after learning a few harsh lessons then this statement puts those illusions firmly in their place. Spending money on the right kind of player and careful investment is one thing, this statement is quite another. Lets say we manage to stay up in that timescale that they have imposed. Where would the considerable money we would have earned gone to? Mike cleared our debts did he? No, Mike is banking on NUFC paying him for mistakes he and predecessors have made and his statement is a 'fuck you' to the support make no mistake, 'Geordie Nation'? He's taking the piss out of us, man! The statement is a rambling shambles and is a bit reminiscent of the 'fact' statement they put out after the KK fiasco.

 

How anyone can take any positives out of this joke statement and defend Ashley defies belief. How thoroughly depressing for anyone who loves this club.

 

Next club to emulate? What about Leeds and their target for promotion to the 2nd division, Mike?

[Barney 0]

from.com

 

A truly bizarre statement that seems to be a vague and clumsy attempt to lower expectations ahead of the new season.

 

No "new capital outlay on players" means what precisely?

 

Are we really expecting to survive in the Premier League with the current squad plus some youngsters from the Academy?

 

"Promoting Regional football" by elevating youngsters from the Academy (which is apparently "brimming with talent") to "truly represent the values of the Geordie nation" will be interesting.

 

Academy talent given squad numbers in the 2009/10 season included only a few locally-born players with most bought in from outside the region. Even the U18s squad that reached the semi-final of the FA Youth Cup was mostly made up of non-North Easterners.

 

The Board will not be commenting on anything from now on. So what's changed there then? All we've had is sporadic, bewildering and unhelpful utterances like the above.

 

We presume (and hope) that the cosy emails from our owner to Sky reporters will also stop now....

[Guest Barrack Road]

[Dr Gloom 22181]

just when we thought there was light at the end of the tunnel they pull us back in

 

[Happy Face 29]

The clowns who pollute message boards and phone -ins with talk of mega signings and top six finishes certainly aren't representative of the real life, common sense Newcastle supporters we know.

 

That's what everyone on here expects.

 

...and don't deny it.

 

Edited May 10, 2010 by Happy Face

[Guest Barrack Road]

The clowns who pollute message boards and phone -ins with talk of mega signings and top six finishes certainly aren't representative of the real life, common sense Newcastle supporters we know.

 

That's what everyone on here expects.

 

...and don't deny it.

 

Speak for to yourself Chichester, I said 17th would do me.

[Craig 6700]

Please tell me those daft sods at N-O aren't still defending that useless fat cunt?

 

As for all those 'so-called' pundits on BBC, Sky Sports etc. who said they didn't know why were were still moaning and should get behind Ashley....

 

Really?

[LeazesMag 0]

It's a sick joke. I've said it before I'll say it again. Newcastle United SHOULD be and should always have been one of the very biggest clubs in this country, why? The fanbase, the players, every single thing about the club. I think it's more than mismanagement and bad luck. We have to be cursed, we are cursed, there's no doubt about it, we're the sickest joke in world sport, I mean that genuinely.

 

yep. He couldn't even let us be slightly optimistic for a few months until the panic set in towards the end of August.

[Guest Barrack Road]

Please tell me those daft sods at N-O aren't still defending that useless fat cunt?

 

As for all those 'so-called' pundits on BBC, Sky Sports etc. who said they didn't know why were were still moaning and should get behind Ashley....

 

Really?

They're a true stain and embarrassment on this once great club. Not one person has put a positive spin on this on here, and so there shouldn't be, if there are only 5 or 6 on NO sticking up for them, then it might as well be a thousand as far as I'm concerned. The definition of clueless fuckwits.

[LeazesMag 0]

Please tell me those daft sods at N-O aren't still defending that useless fat cunt?

 

As for all those 'so-called' pundits on BBC, Sky Sports etc. who said they didn't know why were were still moaning and should get behind Ashley....

 

Really?

 

they will be secretly pleased with this article.

[Guest Barrack Road]

Does anyone feel as bad today as the day we were relegated? Maybe it's just me, but there are wide implications far in to the future.

[LeazesMag 0]

Please tell me those daft sods at N-O aren't still defending that useless fat cunt?

 

As for all those 'so-called' pundits on BBC, Sky Sports etc. who said they didn't know why were were still moaning and should get behind Ashley....

 

Really?

They're a true stain and embarrassment on this once great club. Not one person has put a positive spin on this on here, and so there shouldn't be, if there are only 5 or 6 on NO sticking up for them, then it might as well be a thousand as far as I'm concerned. The definition of clueless fuckwits.

 

 

the trouble also is that because it is the bigger site, some hacks will probably report in their press that the "majority" of fans are behind this move.

 

THAT is embarrassing. Massively embarrassing.

[LeazesMag 0]

Press Release should have been.

 

1. We thank CH for all his efforts but we will be approaching a number of candidates inc Roy for the job over the coming weeks.

2. With the windfall PL money we will secure PL survival.

3. Keep on keeping on.

 

 

END.

Aye or....

 

1. The board would like to set on record that Mike is indeed a fat cunt, who got lucky early in his life, and couldn't spell obese without using an a till 1994 the thick cunt.

2. The board would like to acknowledge that whilst not only looking like a child molester, Derek Llambias is fully advocates the assertion he is an arsehole and someone with worse communication skills than Steve Hawking when the battery runs out.

3. Will some fuckin arab buy us out for fuck sake.

4. Even a yank, or FFS would do.

 

superb