Schools deserted

[Meenzer 15722]

http://www.thedailymash.co.uk/news/society...d-201004302693/

 

SCHOOLS DESERTED

30-04-10

 

BRITAIN'S schools stood empty today, apart from 440,000 joyful teachers swinging tube socks filled with two-pence pieces.

 

As a jury rubber-stamped the explosive violence lurking just below the surface of an entire profession, teachers across the country said it was like getting another 14 weeks of holiday entitlement, but with much more screaming.

 

The teaching unions have now issued each of their members with a large photograph of acquitted teacher Peter Harvey and advised them to frame it and hang it above the blackboard.

 

A spokesman for the National Association of Schoolmasters and Women Teachers said: "This is what we call a 'game changer'."

 

He added: "Hello children, today's word is 'precedent'. Can you use it in a sentence?"

 

Meanwhile, Helen Archer, a chemistry teacher from Hatfield with two tube socks and a bike chain, said: "Where are they? Where are they? It's alright, I can wait. I can wait forever."

 

Tom Logan, an English teacher from Peterborough who has been called an 'arse bandit' 800 times this year, added: "In its wisdom the British judicial system has handed me a massive blank cheque.

 

"I intend to fill it in and then quietly and methodically cash the absolute fucking shit out of it."

 

Julian Cook, a geography teacher form York, arrived early this morning carrying Jenny, his favourite cricket bat.

 

He said: "I am going to introduce Jenny to Kyle Stephenson in 4C. She's going to be his new girlfriend and she's going to go all the way...

 

"I'm ever so depressed."

[soccermom 0]

Am Lovin it!

[Sonatine 11545]

Excellent

[Rob W 0]

I can remember a new English teacher - first day at school some snotty nosed 3rd year ran into him at full pelt in the corridor - he just picked the lad up and threw him against the wall (about five feet off the ground) and resumed his walk without breaking sweat or saying anything - amazing how little trouble he ever had ever after

Edited May 2, 2010 by Rob W

[TheMoog 0]

I can remember a new English teacher - first day at school some snotty nosed 3rd year ran into him at full pelt in the corridor - he just picked the lad up and threw him against the wall (about five feet off the ground) and resumed his walk without breaking sweat or saying anything - amazing how little trouble he ever had ever after

 

How it should be tbh

[Andrew 4858]

I can remember a new English teacher - first day at school some snotty nosed 3rd year ran into him at full pelt in the corridor - he just picked the lad up and threw him against the wall (about five feet off the ground) and resumed his walk without breaking sweat or saying anything - amazing how little trouble he ever had ever after

 

How it should be tbh

 

I only left high school 6 years ago and I agree, some right cunts around and nothing was ever done, as one of the ones who behaved it pissed me off no end

[The Fish 10968]

I can remember a new English teacher - first day at school some snotty nosed 3rd year ran into him at full pelt in the corridor - he just picked the lad up and threw him against the wall (about five feet off the ground) and resumed his walk without breaking sweat or saying anything - amazing how little trouble he ever had ever after

 

How it should be tbh

 

I only left high school 6 years ago and I agree, some right cunts around and nothing was ever done, as one of the ones who behaved it pissed me off no end

 

NEEEEeeerd!

[Andrew 4858]

taught how to behave in public

[The Fish 10968]

taught how to behave in public

Whatever, poindexter... play Dungeons and Dragons on your own time

[Andrew 4858]

taught how to behave in public

Whatever, poindexter... play Dungeons and Dragons on your own time

 

...I do...

[Rob W 0]

big error - should play it it someone elses time