Billy Castell 0 Posted July 28, 2009 Share Posted July 28, 2009 Women who paint themselves in fake tan and walk around like a bunch of slutty oranges. Fans of the 'big clubs' who spend all their time sending in texts/letters to anyone who'll listen slagging off other teams. All the 'my dad can batter your dad' act is annoying. Professional cockneys/scousers/northerners etc. who bang on about where they are from, how outsiders are wankers and how their hometown is somehow superior to the rest of the country. Especially if they don't live in that area (e.g. Jimmy Tarbuck, Anne Robinson and Sean Connery). Fat middle aged women who dress like they're 20 year old supermodel. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
trophyshy 7083 Posted July 28, 2009 Share Posted July 28, 2009 I just realised tonight I hate women who have smaller tits than bellies. Whack a bra round the belly and keep yer eyes shut isn't it? someone should take the belly bra to dragons den, what an invention that would be Get that trout faced woman to try it on. Fucking hell, that would be well worth their opulent wrath. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Park Life 71 Posted July 28, 2009 Author Share Posted July 28, 2009 Ashley is probably planning to market the 'belly bra' as we speak. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
charvski 0 Posted July 30, 2009 Share Posted July 30, 2009 I hate it when people at work either: A>Get a tab break before everyone else has had their normal lunch break, or B>Keeps crying for ages and ages that they are in desperate need for a tab even if they have just started work, just had their lunch break, or are about to finish work. The fuckers should be made to wait. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Fish 10857 Posted December 1, 2012 Share Posted December 1, 2012 Those toilet attendants that look offended when you don't put money in their plate. Fuck you sir, I'm not the one being paid to offer soap and towels to blokes in a fucking toilet. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Park Life 71 Posted December 1, 2012 Author Share Posted December 1, 2012 (edited) Those toilet attendants that look offended when you don't put money in their plate. Fuck you sir, I'm not the one being paid to offer soap and towels to blokes in a fucking toilet. I always used to think they were listening when I was doing a line. Consequently they got a paranoia tip. Edited December 1, 2012 by Park Life Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Brock Manson 0 Posted December 1, 2012 Share Posted December 1, 2012 They're fuckers like. Although there was a guy in BZR in Nottingham who used to sing 'freshen up for dee punani' when you were taking a piss who was alright. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gejon 2 Posted December 1, 2012 Share Posted December 1, 2012 Had a massive argument/almost fight with one of them as he wouldn't move from one of the sinks as I tried to wash my hands. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Monroe Transfer 0 Posted December 1, 2012 Share Posted December 1, 2012 Should have smeared your human waste covered hands all over his face. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Happy Face 29 Posted December 1, 2012 Share Posted December 1, 2012 Sam Allardyce Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CleeToonFan 1 Posted December 1, 2012 Share Posted December 1, 2012 We have a dick who just sings 'no spray no lay no spray no lay' to the ole ole song. All the time. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kid Dynamite 7027 Posted December 1, 2012 Share Posted December 1, 2012 I always used to think they were listening when I was doing a line. Consequently they got a paranoia tip. Where in the toilet cubicle were you doing a line? Off the bog seat or cistern? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RobH 0 Posted December 1, 2012 Share Posted December 1, 2012 They're fuckers like. Although there was a guy in BZR in Nottingham who used to sing 'freshen up for dee punani' when you were taking a piss who was alright. He now works at the blue bell inn. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Brock Manson 0 Posted December 1, 2012 Share Posted December 1, 2012 I don't want to sound racist but...why are they always black? Do these guys even work for the clubs or do they just rock up with a tonne of cologne and chupa chups? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gejon 2 Posted December 1, 2012 Share Posted December 1, 2012 I think they do work for the places, probably chuck them a few quid for the privilege. They are always black though . Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jill 0 Posted December 1, 2012 Share Posted December 1, 2012 Joined together paperclips Possibly the largest influence on my blood pressure Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Fish 10857 Posted December 1, 2012 Share Posted December 1, 2012 I don't want to sound racist but...why are they always black? Do these guys even work for the clubs or do they just rock up with a tonne of cologne and chupa chups? Same reason most cleaners and take-away workers are of an ethnic minority. They'll work a demeaning job, for fuck all while your average white Brit would rather sit on the benefits. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ally 0 Posted December 2, 2012 Share Posted December 2, 2012 Getting off planes. Why do people take so long to pick up a bag from the overhead? Always some idiot blocking the aisle while they rearrange the contents of a bag Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ayatollah Hermione 13866 Posted December 2, 2012 Share Posted December 2, 2012 Getting off planes. Why do people take so long to pick up a bag from the overhead? Always some idiot blocking the aisle while they rearrange the contents of a bag A German tried to steal my coat from the overhead bit once when I landed in New York. Had to chase him down the plane, Air Force One style, to get it back. Think yourself lucky, I say. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Happy Face 29 Posted December 3, 2012 Share Posted December 3, 2012 Getting off planes. Why do people take so long to pick up a bag from the overhead? Always some idiot blocking the aisle while they rearrange the contents of a bag I don't understand the daft fuckers that insist on jumping out of their seat as soon as the seatbelt light goes on...or sooner. Surely they know they'll be stood for 20 minutes in the aisle and then another 20 minutes at baggage. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sweetleftpeg 0 Posted December 3, 2012 Share Posted December 3, 2012 People who park where the fuck they like causing massive inconvenience to everyone else because they're the laziest cunts on the planet. This especially goes for supermarkets where non disabled people park in disabled spaces or outside the entrance meaning we all have to sit in a fucking queue due to one lane of traffic. By the way, you can take photos and name and shame these fuckers at the blog 'You Park like a Cunt.' Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LoveTheBobby 1 Posted December 3, 2012 Share Posted December 3, 2012 I like this . Cunts without kids in the car that take the child parking bays too 'as they are just quickly popping in' . The ones that do it with an empty kids seat can fuck off too . More often than not though it's BMW drivers who think its their right to have a bigger bay / their car POLICED . Height of ignorance . Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gemmill 44872 Posted December 3, 2012 Share Posted December 3, 2012 People who don't clear their windows properly when it's icy/snowy. Drove behind this arsehole the other day who had scraped the driver side of their windscreen only. Their kid was sat on the passenger side, so nothing to worry about there. And last week I was scraping my car to leave work and there was this car on the other side of the car park with the wipers on full blast and the heaters on. They waited until there was two tiny portholes that they could see through, about a foot above their dashboard before pulling away. Get out your car and scrape your fucking windows, you lazy stupid cunts. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Alex 35079 Posted December 3, 2012 Share Posted December 3, 2012 What a great read this is btw. I have to agree with everything people have said too. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sweetleftpeg 0 Posted December 3, 2012 Share Posted December 3, 2012 Aye, Gem, spot on. What kind of fucknut thinks it's safe to pull away with about 10% vision from a windscreen? Did anyone ever see Dr Tom Shakespeare's (google him) documentary about people taking the piss out of disabled parking bays? He had an afternoon of naming and shaming at a supermarket where he collared every non blue badge holder who'd parked in a bay. Was cracking stuff. Best bit though, he collars this woman for parking in a disabled bay and she goes 'I'm really sorry, I'm only parking here because I'm a mother of a young baby and loads of people are taking up the Baby and Child spaces.' Fair enough says Dr Tom, and takes sympathy with her saying he kind of understands why she did it and he lets her off. She then goes straight into the supermarket, without a baby. Dr Tom goes 'erm..aren't you forgotten your baby?' to which the lass replies 'oh, I haven't got him with me now, he's in the house.' Fuck me. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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