Teachers you thought were cunts

[Alex newcastle fc Collett 0]

mr laneua he was our spanish teacher he called me a retard

 

he got sacked 2 days later

[Matt 0]

Beck was my form tutor in the second year and came across as a funny bloke, If a little arrogant like! Stevie, did you have much to do with Mr Shaw, he was another one who I didn't really get on with!

I hated Shaw more than any teacher in that school. Not because he ranted and raved but he was a wierd little evil bastard. He managed the A team in the fourth year, and he was and is the only person that's ever dropped me, it was purely personal, he made it clear he didn't like me and he's a fuckin total mug. There was something deeply sinister about him that was difficult to quantify, all I can say is I wouldn't like to know what he gets up to in private.

 

And worse the same Uncle Ben's logo tracksuit for decades, it seems.

[sweetleftpeg 0]

Mrs Ridley - Sour faced RE teaching bitch who came back after one summer break with the most obvious facelift you've ever seen. Kept me in detention for two weeks after I questioned Mary Magdalene's real relationship with JC. After that the fucker had my card marked all year and gave me detentions for fuck all, the worst of which was for my saying Jaws wasn't actually that scary. I hope your facelift has gone all Leslie Ash you stupid bitch.

[Golden Glory 0]

We had a South African RS teacher a couple of years back, Miss Alexander. She said she was of Indian origin, I think, but I reckon it was Oompa Loompa. She was about 4 foot tall, fat and ugly. Not only this but she claimed she had a pet lion back at home, which was never substantiated with pictoral evidence. She also thinks she saw her friend get raped in a bush in Wimbledon, she said she did nothing about it either. Fucking loon. Those lessons weren't half fun though, hiding underneath desks. Spending whole lessons (the entire class) facing the opposite direction, murmurs of 'oompah loompah doopety doo' going around the class. And the probing questions when we covered sexual ethics. Great times.

Edited July 24, 2008 by Golden Glory

[Tooj 17]

We had a South African RS teacher a couple of years back, Miss Alexander. She said she was of Indian origin, I think, but I reckon it was Oompa Loompa. She was about 4 foot tall, fat and ugly. Not only this but she claimed she had a pet lion back at home, which was never substantiated with pictoral evidence. She also thinks she saw her friend get raped in a bush in Wimbledon, she said she did nothing about it either. Fucking loon. Those lessons weren't half fun though, hiding underneath desks. Spending whole lessons (the entire class) facing the opposite direction, murmurs of 'oompah loompah doopety doo' going around the class. And the probing questions when we covered sexual ethics. Great times.

[Guest Tuco Ramirez]

Anth, bumped in to Dave Stapes outside the match on Sunday actually, he looks like a fat old ginger Jeff Capes, he recognised me though.

[Ruler of Planet Houston 1]

Miss Matthewson - Art teacher used to put me on detention every lesson!

 

Ms Tuffield - English elf used to put me on detention almost every lesson

 

Mr Bohill - PE, used to treat us like we were on that US Marines training documentary and make us do it in our underpants if we forgot our stuff.

[Happy Face 29]

Miss Matthewson - Art teacher used to put me on detention every lesson!

 

Ms Tuffield - English elf used to put me on detention almost every lesson

 

Mr Bohill - PE, used to treat us like we were on that US Marines training documentary and make us do it in our underpants if we forgot our stuff.

 

 

I know you don't I?

[Ruler of Planet Houston 1]

You're darn tootin!

[Happy Face 29]

You're darn tootin!

 

 

I thought so the day you joined with that username.

[Renton 21579]

Mrs Ridley - Sour faced RE teaching bitch who came back after one summer break with the most obvious facelift you've ever seen. Kept me in detention for two weeks after I questioned Mary Magdalene's real relationship with JC. After that the fucker had my card marked all year and gave me detentions for fuck all, the worst of which was for my saying Jaws wasn't actually that scary. I hope your facelift has gone all Leslie Ash you stupid bitch.

 

Missed this thread first time round.

 

Aye, Mrs Ridley indeed, horrible cow and a mad hypocrite to boot. Was Mr Theobalds still alive when you were at Thomas Moore SLP?

[Ruler of Planet Houston 1]

You're darn tootin!

 

 

I thought so the day you joined with that username.

 

Aye...well recommended! But I am struggling to get my work done now cos I keep reading stuff on here!

[The Mighty Hog 518]

Mrs (or Ms, I can't remember) McDonald - For some reason she took a real dislike to me and told me I'd be lucky to get a grade in Business Studies and stuck me in for the foundation paper. Needless to say I was over the moon to get a C, which was the top grade for that paper. She stunk of tabs and lethally strong coffee and thought an Extra Strong mint would cover it up.

 

Mrs Mallett - Very rarely had her and never had a run in with her, more just to say the poor woman was a fill in teacher and mercilessly has the the piss ripped out of her all the time. I think she was German and no one respected her let alone listened to her. I think she would nearly have a nervous break down every lesson.

[Happy Face 29]

You're darn tootin!

 

 

I thought so the day you joined with that username.

 

Aye...well recommended! But I am struggling to get my work done now cos I keep reading stuff on here!

 

I was advancing through the ranks in my job quite well until I found this place.

[Brock Manson 0]

My personal tutor at university, Professor John Ashworth.

 

In the first year we had to meet them and have a brief session to get to know eachother (oo-er not like that).

 

Talked about how the course was going and the extra-curricular stuff I was doing, and then he asked how the social side was. I'd been dumped by the ex 3 days before the meeting, so wasn't in the best of places. When I relayed this information, his response was a mumbled "Dumped as in what sense of the word?" Prick.

 

When I had failed one of the core modules (it was a 10 credit american history module; we had no seminars and no help, and I'd never written a history essay before so I flunked it), I had to see him. Looking at my results (which were all fine apart from that one) he says "You did badly in that one, didn't you?"

 

I told him that he was a terrible personal tutor and that I'd be making a complaint and requesting a switch. Don't know what happened about the complaint, but I got a better tutor out of it all.

[donaldstott 0]

Yous can all sod off.

 

I'm 29. Which means I went to Central from... *counts on fingers* 1988 to 1992. Ouch.

 

Which means I must have been in the year above you.

 

I saw Doc Coch in Osbornes years later, by himself, still learing over lasses far too young for him.

 

FWIW I didn't like the maths teacher who grew his ginger beard in the winter to stave off the cold, can't remember his name, only that he was a joyless bastard.

 

I liked Norbury and Knill, the latter who I saw throw an eraser full pelt across the classroom at a kid called Jonny Maxstead, who wasn't paying attention. I also told him to 'fuck off and get a life' while pissed on a school trip to Malton, he did nowt.

[Kevin 1]

Ms mclaughlin have her for another year. The stupidest teacher i have ever, ever, ever had. When i was off in April when my granny died she started roaring at me why i wasn't in and why i didn't have my coursework done, told her why, she got in another teacher and i quote "kevin has no coursework done and he 'claims' his grandmother died, no note, no phonecall no nothing, seems a bit dodgy to me". I was ready to punch the cunt Hope the bitch gets hit by a bus.

[DanTheMan 0]

My personal tutor at university, Professor John Ashworth.

 

In the first year we had to meet them and have a brief session to get to know eachother (oo-er not like that).

 

Talked about how the course was going and the extra-curricular stuff I was doing, and then he asked how the social side was. I'd been dumped by the ex 3 days before the meeting, so wasn't in the best of places. When I relayed this information, his response was a mumbled "Dumped as in what sense of the word?" Prick.

 

When I had failed one of the core modules (it was a 10 credit american history module; we had no seminars and no help, and I'd never written a history essay before so I flunked it), I had to see him. Looking at my results (which were all fine apart from that one) he says "You did badly in that one, didn't you?"

 

I told him that he was a terrible personal tutor and that I'd be making a complaint and requesting a switch. Don't know what happened about the complaint, but I got a better tutor out of it all.

 

I don't really understand what you're complaining about there- aren't personal tutors supposed to keep an eye out for bad marks?

[ewerk 30558]

My personal tutor at university, Professor John Ashworth.

 

In the first year we had to meet them and have a brief session to get to know eachother (oo-er not like that).

 

Talked about how the course was going and the extra-curricular stuff I was doing, and then he asked how the social side was. I'd been dumped by the ex 3 days before the meeting, so wasn't in the best of places. When I relayed this information, his response was a mumbled "Dumped as in what sense of the word?" Prick.

 

@ you for confusing your personal tutor with your personal therapist.

[Brock Manson 0]

My personal tutor at university, Professor John Ashworth.

 

In the first year we had to meet them and have a brief session to get to know eachother (oo-er not like that).

 

Talked about how the course was going and the extra-curricular stuff I was doing, and then he asked how the social side was. I'd been dumped by the ex 3 days before the meeting, so wasn't in the best of places. When I relayed this information, his response was a mumbled "Dumped as in what sense of the word?" Prick.

 

When I had failed one of the core modules (it was a 10 credit american history module; we had no seminars and no help, and I'd never written a history essay before so I flunked it), I had to see him. Looking at my results (which were all fine apart from that one) he says "You did badly in that one, didn't you?"

 

I told him that he was a terrible personal tutor and that I'd be making a complaint and requesting a switch. Don't know what happened about the complaint, but I got a better tutor out of it all.

 

I don't really understand what you're complaining about there- aren't personal tutors supposed to keep an eye out for bad marks?

 

I went to him because I had a bad mark. The cunt didn't help by stating the obvious, nor did he offer any useful advice.

 

The department would send emails telling us all to book a mandatory appointment with a tutor. Like clockwork there'd be a blanket email coming from him telling us that he was busy and only wanted us to book if we had 'real' conerns.

[ewerk 30558]

Ms mclaughlin have her for another year. The stupidest teacher i have ever, ever, ever had. When i was off in April when my granny died she started roaring at me why i wasn't in and why i didn't have my coursework done, told her why, she got in another teacher and i quote "kevin has no coursework done and he 'claims' his grandmother died, no note, no phonecall no nothing, seems a bit dodgy to me". I was ready to punch the cunt Hope the bitch gets hit by a bus.

 

Should've quickly changed your story so that the other granny died, then settled on your girlfriend having a miscarriage.

[DanTheMan 0]

My personal tutor at university, Professor John Ashworth.

 

In the first year we had to meet them and have a brief session to get to know eachother (oo-er not like that).

 

Talked about how the course was going and the extra-curricular stuff I was doing, and then he asked how the social side was. I'd been dumped by the ex 3 days before the meeting, so wasn't in the best of places. When I relayed this information, his response was a mumbled "Dumped as in what sense of the word?" Prick.

 

@ you for confusing your personal tutor with your personal therapist.

 

Aye, that's what I was thinking- I'd probably change the subject too!

[DanTheMan 0]

My personal tutor at university, Professor John Ashworth.

 

In the first year we had to meet them and have a brief session to get to know eachother (oo-er not like that).

 

Talked about how the course was going and the extra-curricular stuff I was doing, and then he asked how the social side was. I'd been dumped by the ex 3 days before the meeting, so wasn't in the best of places. When I relayed this information, his response was a mumbled "Dumped as in what sense of the word?" Prick.

 

When I had failed one of the core modules (it was a 10 credit american history module; we had no seminars and no help, and I'd never written a history essay before so I flunked it), I had to see him. Looking at my results (which were all fine apart from that one) he says "You did badly in that one, didn't you?"

 

I told him that he was a terrible personal tutor and that I'd be making a complaint and requesting a switch. Don't know what happened about the complaint, but I got a better tutor out of it all.

 

I don't really understand what you're complaining about there- aren't personal tutors supposed to keep an eye out for bad marks?

 

I went to him because I had a bad mark. The cunt didn't help by stating the obvious, nor did he offer any useful advice.

 

The department would send emails telling us all to book a mandatory appointment with a tutor. Like clockwork there'd be a blanket email coming from him telling us that he was busy and only wanted us to book if we had 'real' conerns.

 

Fair enough- I think personal tutors are generally a waste of time really- if people can't manage their own affairs by the time they get to uni then there's no hope for them.

Edited August 24, 2010 by DanTheMan

[Guest alex]

My personal tutor at university, Professor John Ashworth.

 

In the first year we had to meet them and have a brief session to get to know eachother (oo-er not like that).

 

Talked about how the course was going and the extra-curricular stuff I was doing, and then he asked how the social side was. I'd been dumped by the ex 3 days before the meeting, so wasn't in the best of places. When I relayed this information, his response was a mumbled "Dumped as in what sense of the word?" Prick.

 

When I had failed one of the core modules (it was a 10 credit american history module; we had no seminars and no help, and I'd never written a history essay before so I flunked it), I had to see him. Looking at my results (which were all fine apart from that one) he says "You did badly in that one, didn't you?"

 

I told him that he was a terrible personal tutor and that I'd be making a complaint and requesting a switch. Don't know what happened about the complaint, but I got a better tutor out of it all.

 

I don't really understand what you're complaining about there- aren't personal tutors supposed to keep an eye out for bad marks?

 

I went to him because I had a bad mark. The cunt didn't help by stating the obvious, nor did he offer any useful advice.

 

The department would send emails telling us all to book a mandatory appointment with a tutor. Like clockwork there'd be a blanket email coming from him telling us that he was busy and only wanted us to book if we had 'real' conerns.

I might be missing something but that sounds ideal to me.

[Kevin 1]

Ms mclaughlin have her for another year. The stupidest teacher i have ever, ever, ever had. When i was off in April when my granny died she started roaring at me why i wasn't in and why i didn't have my coursework done, told her why, she got in another teacher and i quote "kevin has no coursework done and he 'claims' his grandmother died, no note, no phonecall no nothing, seems a bit dodgy to me". I was ready to punch the cunt Hope the bitch gets hit by a bus.

 

Should've quickly changed your story so that the other granny died, then settled on your girlfriend having a miscarriage.

 

Hilarious.