Smeeagain

[bobbyshinton 59]

A man is waiting while his wife gives birth.

 

 

The doctor comes out of the theatre afterwards and informs the father that his son was born

without arms, legs, or even a torso - his son is just a head!

 

 

But the dad loves his son and raises him as well as he can, with love and

compassion.

 

After 18 years, the son is old enough for his first drink.

 

Dad takes him to the pub and tearfully tells his son he is proud of

him.

 

Dad orders up the biggest strongest drink for his son.

 

 

With all the patrons looking on curiously and the barman shaking his head in

disbelief, the boy takes his first sip of alcohol.

 

 

Swoosh - a torso pops out!

 

The bar is dead silent, then bursts into a whoop of joy.

 

 

The father, shocked, begs his son to drink again.

 

 

The patrons chant "Drink! Drink!Drink!"

 

 

 

 

The barman still shakes his head in dismay. Swoosh - two arms pop out!

 

The bar goes wild.

 

 

 

The father, crying and wailing, begs his son to drink again.

 

 

 

The patrons chant "Drink! Drink! Drink!"

 

 

The barman ignores the whole affair.

 

 

By now the son is getting tipsy, and with his new hands he reaches down, grabs his drink, and guzzles the last of it.

 

 

Swoosh - Two legs pop out!

 

The bar is in chaos.

 

 

 

The father thanks God.

 

 

 

 

The boy stands up on his new legs and stumbles to the left... then to the right... then through

the front door, into the street, where a truck runs into him and kills

him.

 

 

The bar falls silent.

 

 

The father moans in grief. And the barman cleans his glasses and whistles an old Irish tune.

 

 

 

The father looks at the barman in disbelief and asks,

 

 

 

 

"How can you be so cold and callous?"

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

 

 

 

"That boy should have quit while he was a head," the barman replies

[acrossthepond 901]

Head today, gone tomorrow?