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Wiping your arse


Holden McGroin
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It cost them the War. Whereas the Wehrmacht required suitable squatting stations for pissing and wiping thereby slowing their advance (and retreat), the Tommies could just " piss & go".… assuming they didn't trip over their massive floppy foreskins.

Haha aye the big Schnozzle's are nee good

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  • 1 year later...

I write this as a lifelong stander.

 

Over the last few weeks I've been experimenting with sitting. It has been a life changing experience. Not really suffered from the much feared butterfly effect previously so wasn't convinced by the arguments. What I have found is that by sitting you improve the access to your ring piece dramatically, perhaps by 100 percent. Standing closes of the angle so you end up using realms of paper. No more.

 

Out of habit this evening, I forgot and stood up, as has happened on a few occasions during this time, where I would continue to wipe standing as normal. Tonight, I actually sat down again to wipe. This wasn't just staying where I was, this was making a choice to sit.

 

Thank you toontastic, for without you I would never have made this change.

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I would guess the standers are the same people that drop their pants around their ankles to have a piss too

 

:lol: Yes! Another trait that very odd people retain from their childhood. Stood at the urinal like funny little man-boys.

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i'm yet to see a convincing argument made by the standers

 

I still can't get how you access your arse while on the seat.

 

The only way to do so it to partially stand.

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Resurrecting a 5 year old thread to build an alliance of sitters long after the debate was lost is a dirty trick. Much like wiping your arse by sticking your hand into the toilet.

 

Tramps.

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Lift one side up and pop your hand under. Holding toilet paper, I mean.

 

That absolutely destroys any argument that sitters make about the butterfly effect.

 

I just tried to sit down wipe, you cannot lift one side without the parted cheeks coming back together.

 

You MUST keep the cheeks parted with one hand, stand for purchase and wipe with the other. Anything else flies in the face of millions of years of evolution.

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There's something grotesquely wrong with your arse HF, you filthy shit smearer.

 

You've resorted to ad hominem attack without arguing methodology. Another sit down wiper unable to defend their dreadful behaviour.

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When you sit down, do you just sit down like? Do you not pull them ample cheeks apart a little to avoid smearage?

 

The seat does that for you man. It's all about using your environment to maximum effect. Like Macgyver.

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The seat does that for you man. It's all about using your environment to maximum effect. Like Macgyver.

 

Not when you're hanging off it, balanced on one leg trying to stick your hand into the bowl.

 

I often wondered about those people you hear about who fall off the toilet and in some cases die :lol: . Clearly sit down wiping contortionism explains it.

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