The Fish 10857 Posted March 8, 2013 Share Posted March 8, 2013 the only time i'm going to the effort of wiping standing up is if i'm at a festival or something and the toilet seat is so fowl that i'm forced to perform a hover shit Does that count as a chicken shit? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dr Gloom 21921 Posted March 8, 2013 Share Posted March 8, 2013 foul even Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BigWalrus 0 Posted March 8, 2013 Share Posted March 8, 2013 The toilet seat is designed so your cheeks perch on either side, forcing open the anus and allowing the shit to be ejected / slide out. Sitting down to wipe involves using the tilted perch to keep your rectum parted allowing maximum access to the dirty ringpiece. Stood up, you have to either semi-crouch to open your arsehole up, or use the free hand to hold open your backside, risking dirtying the free hand. Standing is a filthy habit. Horrible. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ruler of Planet Houston 1 Posted March 8, 2013 Share Posted March 8, 2013 Stander: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BigWalrus 0 Posted March 8, 2013 Share Posted March 8, 2013 Also, when you stand, you're miles away from the bog. Huge risk of shit particles falling from your arse during the wiping process, which could land anywhere. You could end up with them on your sock, which then transfers to your carpet and your settee and your loved ones. At least, when sitting, any loose particles will safely fall into the safety of the bowl, or at worst on to the edge of the seat, where they can be easily identified by the contrasting colours, and dealt with accordingly. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ayatollah Hermione 13866 Posted March 9, 2013 Share Posted March 9, 2013 BigWalrus speaking immeasurable amounts of sense here. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Shaun 0 Posted March 9, 2013 Share Posted March 9, 2013 I wiped my arse sitting down once and my finger slid right up. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ayatollah Hermione 13866 Posted March 9, 2013 Share Posted March 9, 2013 I wiped my arse sitting down once and my finger slid right up. And in and out again and again, no doubt, you sexual deviant. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gejon 2 Posted March 9, 2013 Share Posted March 9, 2013 (edited) That's unfair, is that the avatar of a sexual deviant? Oh right, yeah. Actually given the lean in that picture Edited March 9, 2013 by Gejon Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Howmanheyman 33196 Posted March 9, 2013 Share Posted March 9, 2013 I've said it before, It's Brian Blessed's Grandson. That's an audition pic for his college. He's in for the role of Zeus in their amateur production musical version of 'Jason and the Argonauts'. Good luck, Shaun! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest TC16 Posted March 9, 2013 Share Posted March 9, 2013 I don't wipe. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Shaun 0 Posted March 9, 2013 Share Posted March 9, 2013 I've said it before, It's Brian Blessed's Grandson. That's an audition pic for his college. He's in for the role of Zeus in their amateur production musical version of 'Jason and the Argonauts'. Good luck, Shaun! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Monkeys Fist 42440 Posted March 9, 2013 Share Posted March 9, 2013 I'll wipe up your mess, Sweetcheeks. Kinky Bitch! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Fish 10857 Posted July 22, 2014 Share Posted July 22, 2014 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rayvin 5223 Posted July 22, 2014 Share Posted July 22, 2014 that is a brilliant article. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JawD 99 Posted July 23, 2014 Share Posted July 23, 2014 Fantastic. Though no mention of sitting or standing. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
aimaad22 4156 Posted July 23, 2014 Share Posted July 23, 2014 Water Dont think I could ever just wipe and walk off feeling normal Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ewerk 30609 Posted July 23, 2014 Share Posted July 23, 2014 I never understood how that works. How do you not soak your clothes and how do you dry off? I think both sitters and standers can agree that you're a fucking weirdo. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
aimaad22 4156 Posted July 23, 2014 Share Posted July 23, 2014 I suppose it depends on what you've been doing since as a childNot soaking your clothes comes naturally with practice, you could always put them aside if its that much of a problem. Use tissues for drying up. The concept of not using water is just so well......icky... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ChezGiven 0 Posted July 23, 2014 Share Posted July 23, 2014 Me too. I'm a stickler for a pristine ring-piece Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Andrew 4748 Posted July 23, 2014 Share Posted July 23, 2014 So what happens if you need to go somewhere with stalls? You must've had to shit at work some time? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
adios 717 Posted July 23, 2014 Share Posted July 23, 2014 have to agree with aimaad here. I finish off with a baby wipe, and rarely need one away from home. mind you, I also wipe after I piss, so the pair of us are probably giant weirdos Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gemmill 44872 Posted July 23, 2014 Share Posted July 23, 2014 I wipe the toilet seat after I piss. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Christmas Tree 4725 Posted July 23, 2014 Share Posted July 23, 2014 have to agree with aimaad here. I finish off with a baby wipe, and rarely need one away from home. mind you, I also wipe after I piss, so the pair of us are probably giant weirdos Men using baby wipes for anal cleansing is a big no no. It removes necessary oils from the skin and is thought to be responsible for severe anal itching. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
adios 717 Posted July 23, 2014 Share Posted July 23, 2014 I wax the floor. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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