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Wiping your arse


Holden McGroin
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After years of defending standers on here I just actually thought about it whilst in the act and realised I'm a sitter. Wiping your arse must be a bit like driving a familiar route.

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Thalidomide would also make it tricky.

 

Conversely I now picture sitters as having chimp/orang type arms to reach that far or perhaps prehensile monkeys tails.

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The idea that you can't reach your arse with your hand whilst in a sitting position is bizarre. Are you some sort of T-Rex.

 

I can reach it in my arms being long enough sense but there is no access without lifting it from the seat ie standing.

 

I think you don't get that "standing" means maintaining a squat only with the body supported by the legs instead of the seat which also means the cheeks stay spread.

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Just realised that some post on here in the last 24 hours (Gloom?), suggested a back to front motion. I worry that this requires access from the front and parting your legs like a tart.

 

I hope this is wrong. :(

 

Ignore it! Never wipe back to front!

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I wonder if women go front to back as it were in order to converse toilet paper and clean both orifices in one motion.

 

Do you really wonder that? :lol:

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By sawing, I assume you mean rubbing backwards and forwards. Which is a fucking disgrace. Especially for a hairy bastard like you.

 

Must be like Brian May's plughole back there, and you're adopting a sawing motion to sort things out.

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:lol: at this thread.

 

A woman can't back to front wipe obviously, but a man, unless he's a mong can go either way.

 

I'm traditionally a sitter, but have experimented with standing. To be more accurate I'd call it squatting as you can maintain the same sitting stance while improving the angle and at the same time it's good for your quadriceps.

 

Sitting is lazier than this variation of squatting/standing but both can be effective.

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Too much sitting and not enough standing I think you'll find. But I will not imagine wiping that thing, I just won't.

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