Dr Kenneth Noisewater 0 Posted March 21, 2007 Share Posted March 21, 2007 Bets On Heather's Leg An online gambling website is offering bets on whether Heather Mills' prosthetic leg will fall off during America's Dancing With The Stars TV show. The site Bodog.com has invited punters to lay money on the estranged wife of Beatles bassist Sir Paul McCartney having such a mishap. Mills lost her leg in a 1993 traffic accident. The website, based in Antigua, made a 'No' outcome the heavy favourite. It said the ex-model's leg "must fall off, not be purposely taken off, during a dance routine for all 'Yes' wagers to be graded a win" The TV show involves couples - a star and a professional dancer - competing in a variety of ballroom performances. Its fourth season in the US is scheduled to begin on March 19, with a line-up of 11 celebrities. Mills told celebrity TV show Extra that she wanted to show people that "even with a prosthetic leg you can dance". She said: "It's very unlikely my leg's going to fly off even though it would be quite funny to knock one of the judges out." Mills and McCartney announced their separation in May 2006 after four years of marriage and the birth of a daughter. The couple's impending divorce has generated a slew of mutual accusations and bitter fighting. http://news.sky.com/skynews/article/0,,701...6,00.html?f=rss I'd like to see a can-can round and the first few rows of the audience give dustbin lids as shields tbh. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tooj 17 Posted March 21, 2007 Share Posted March 21, 2007 Benny Hill music of some sort would also be required. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Fop 1 Posted March 21, 2007 Share Posted March 21, 2007 Mills told celebrity TV show Extra that she wanted to show people that "even with a prosthetic leg you can dance". Aye right, wasn't anything to do with the huge publicity campaign she's on trying to re-celebrity herself (and grief doesn’t she milk that leg, nasty thing to happen to you to be sure, but losing one leg below the knee is about the “best” missing body part to have, and frankly severe arthritis could cripple you more with modern prosthetics). Woman is a loon, before she married him of the pudding bowl hair do, she used to go to job interviews and pretend to be someone else with the same name (because they had better qualifications and job experience than herself - which was basically zero and zero).... how she thought she'd get away with that I dunno, but it shows the level of insanity of the women. Tbh her early porn exploits were probably about her level. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
snakehips 0 Posted March 21, 2007 Share Posted March 21, 2007 Mills told celebrity TV show Extra that she wanted to show people that "even with a prosthetic leg you can dance". Aye right, wasn't anything to do with the huge publicity campaign she's on trying to re-celebrity herself (and grief doesn’t she milk that leg, nasty thing to happen to you to be sure, but losing one leg below the knee is about the “best” missing body part to have, and frankly severe arthritis could cripple you more with modern prosthetics). Woman is a loon, before she married him of the pudding bowl hair do, she used to go to job interviews and pretend to be someone else with the same name (because they had better qualifications and job experience than herself - which was basically zero and zero).... how she thought she'd get away with that I dunno, but it shows the level of insanity of the women. Tbh her early porn exploits were probably about her level. I get the distinct impression she's not on your Christmas card list. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Fop 1 Posted March 21, 2007 Share Posted March 21, 2007 Mills told celebrity TV show Extra that she wanted to show people that "even with a prosthetic leg you can dance". Aye right, wasn't anything to do with the huge publicity campaign she's on trying to re-celebrity herself (and grief doesn’t she milk that leg, nasty thing to happen to you to be sure, but losing one leg below the knee is about the “best” missing body part to have, and frankly severe arthritis could cripple you more with modern prosthetics). Woman is a loon, before she married him of the pudding bowl hair do, she used to go to job interviews and pretend to be someone else with the same name (because they had better qualifications and job experience than herself - which was basically zero and zero).... how she thought she'd get away with that I dunno, but it shows the level of insanity of the women. Tbh her early porn exploits were probably about her level. I get the distinct impression she's not on your Christmas card list. Heh no not really, just amazing how far someone can get if they play their cards right. (she'll probably be the first US female and non US-born President therefore ) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Renton 22641 Posted March 21, 2007 Share Posted March 21, 2007 What porn exploits? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jusoda Kid 1 Posted March 21, 2007 Share Posted March 21, 2007 Two heather mills of the same name both with a wooden leg FFS who's she kidding. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Fop 1 Posted March 21, 2007 Share Posted March 21, 2007 What porn exploits? She did some soft and bordering on hardcore stuff when younger, allegedly also worked abroad as a "high class" prostitute. The stuff about her pretending to be other people is more interesting tbh, it must take amazing cheek and nerve (or just being mental) to do that, as you're bound to be caught out in the end (apparently she was in one or two interviews when the interviewers actually knew the person she was pretending to be). She’s lead an interesting life to put it mildly, but I think she’s probably more than a little mentally ill tbf and is certainly a fantasist at the least, but she does work the publicity machine very well. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gemmill 47569 Posted March 27, 2007 Share Posted March 27, 2007 Fair play to the lass. They showed a clip on the telly this morning, and she even did a backflip type thing. She looked alright an'all. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tooj 17 Posted March 27, 2007 Share Posted March 27, 2007 Fair play to the lass. They showed a clip on the telly this morning, and she even did a backflip type thing. She looked alright an'all. *Inserts joke about something involving Gemmill and a leg over.* Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tooj 17 Posted March 27, 2007 Share Posted March 27, 2007 On that note I really couldn't shag a woman with a prosthetic leg, I dunno there's just something about it. I mean if she left the leg on it would feel a bit dodgy stroking up and down the leg and thigh to create a bit of a tease sensation if you will when she blatantly wouldn't be feeling anything at all. Then what if she doesn't actually leave it on? I mean can you imagine you're about to slip in the old pork sword then you get the "Oh wait a minute there pet I'm just gonna unscrew me leg." Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
duckerDavies 0 Posted March 27, 2007 Share Posted March 27, 2007 Fair play to the lass. They showed a clip on the telly this morning, and she even did a backflip type thing. She looked alright an'all. *Inserts joke about something involving Gemmill and a leg over.* Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Baggio 0 Posted March 27, 2007 Share Posted March 27, 2007 On that note I really couldn't shag a woman with a prosthetic leg, I dunno there's just something about it. I mean if she left the leg on it would feel a bit dodgy stroking up and down the leg and thigh to create a bit of a tease sensation if you will when she blatantly wouldn't be feeling anything at all. Then what if she doesn't actually leave it on? I mean can you imagine you're about to slip in the old pork sword then you get the "Oh wait a minute there pet I'm just gonna unscrew me leg." Have you seen Deuce Bigalow, mate? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gemmill 47569 Posted March 27, 2007 Share Posted March 27, 2007 On that note I really couldn't shag a woman with a prosthetic leg, I dunno there's just something about it. I mean if she left the leg on it would feel a bit dodgy stroking up and down the leg and thigh to create a bit of a tease sensation if you will when she blatantly wouldn't be feeling anything at all. Then what if she doesn't actually leave it on? I mean can you imagine you're about to slip in the old pork sword then you get the "Oh wait a minute there pet I'm just gonna unscrew me leg." Do you seriously think she would leave her leg on like? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tooj 17 Posted March 27, 2007 Share Posted March 27, 2007 On that note I really couldn't shag a woman with a prosthetic leg, I dunno there's just something about it. I mean if she left the leg on it would feel a bit dodgy stroking up and down the leg and thigh to create a bit of a tease sensation if you will when she blatantly wouldn't be feeling anything at all. Then what if she doesn't actually leave it on? I mean can you imagine you're about to slip in the old pork sword then you get the "Oh wait a minute there pet I'm just gonna unscrew me leg." Do you seriously think she would leave her leg on like? I honestly have no idea mate as I've never watched a film with an amputee in there or plan on shagging one. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gemmill 47569 Posted March 27, 2007 Share Posted March 27, 2007 Neither have I, but common sense tells me that the leg will be removed. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tooj 17 Posted March 27, 2007 Share Posted March 27, 2007 Neither have I, but common sense tells me that the leg will be removed. Prosthesis has evolved a lot though, I mean just look at Cuba Gooding in Men Of Honour. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tooj 17 Posted March 27, 2007 Share Posted March 27, 2007 I'm also expecting a full report from Gemmill but not including diagrams the next time he shags someone with a prosthetic leg. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gemmill 47569 Posted March 27, 2007 Share Posted March 27, 2007 Unlikely to happen, but if it does, I'll PM you with the details. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sweetleftpeg 0 Posted March 27, 2007 Share Posted March 27, 2007 I hear the police have bollocked her for making so many 999 calls. Mind, she's been getting some death threats which would make anyone paranoid. Reckon her autobiography is a load of shite as well, claiming she was homeless and what not. Utter bollocks apparently. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tinofbeans 91 Posted March 27, 2007 Share Posted March 27, 2007 (edited) scary person, obsessed with fame and money at all costs. Doubt anything in her autobiography is true... except the obvious things like getting married and stuff. still can't beleive what one of pauls daughters got her for the wedding present, a bottle of immac for one leg and an orbital sander for the other! Edited March 27, 2007 by canofbeans Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gemmill 47569 Posted March 27, 2007 Share Posted March 27, 2007 The famous scouse wit. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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