Monkeys Fist 42004 Posted April 18, 2020 Share Posted April 18, 2020 So you just head butted it flat? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TheGingerQuiff 2412 Posted April 18, 2020 Share Posted April 18, 2020 Come on now, it's not cone shaped 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ayatollah Hermione 13768 Posted April 18, 2020 Share Posted April 18, 2020 Christ, CT will be shitting no thicker than thread 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Monkeys Fist 42004 Posted April 18, 2020 Share Posted April 18, 2020 14 minutes ago, Christmas Tree said: No, other than putting a plate down and cutting around it as you do with pastry but then it would have been too small. Kids reckoned I should throw and stretch it but we all know how that would have panned out Here’s a little instruction clip. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Monkeys Fist 42004 Posted April 18, 2020 Share Posted April 18, 2020 Here’s some tips for you next time you make a pizza. 1. Don’t use a fucking plasterers trowel to apply the topping- for a 10 inch pizza ( thats the diameter, not thickness), use 1 tablespoon (absolute maximum, use less tbh) of pizza sauce. 2. Don’t put fucking bolognaise on a pizza. ( but if you must, see above, put a few teaspoons of it dotted around). 3. Cheese- use fresh, diced or sliced mozzarella if you can. If not, the pre-grated stuff is fine. Not cheddar! Again, don’t go fucking apeshit with it. 4. Practice rolling things in to a circular shape beforehand- try not to bite through your tongue when you’re doing it though. 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Christmas Tree 4679 Posted April 18, 2020 Share Posted April 18, 2020 9 minutes ago, Monkeys Fist said: Here’s some tips for you next time you make a pizza. 1. Don’t use a fucking plasterers trowel to apply the topping- for a 10 inch pizza ( thats the diameter, not thickness), use 1 tablespoon (absolute maximum, use less tbh) of pizza sauce. 2. Don’t put fucking bolognaise on a pizza. ( but if you must, see above, put a few teaspoons of it dotted around). 3. Cheese- use fresh, diced or sliced mozzarella if you can. If not, the pre-grated stuff is fine. Not cheddar! Again, don’t go fucking apeshit with it. 4. Practice rolling things in to a circular shape beforehand- try not to bite through your tongue when you’re doing it though. Cheers, I did wonder if there was too much topping tbh but surprisingly it was very nice. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Renton 21231 Posted April 18, 2020 Share Posted April 18, 2020 I say this honestly CT. The collection of photos you have put on this thread are magnificent. Organise them into book format with the recipe instructions, get a book deal (or I'm sure nowadays you can do this yourself or with minimal crowd funding, @Rayvin might know), and get this out. Have your face on the inside cover, and brief biog. Hard back coffee table style. Honestly think it could be a huge hit. You've got enough material now. 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Alex 34786 Posted April 18, 2020 Share Posted April 18, 2020 34” base 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rayvin 5164 Posted April 18, 2020 Share Posted April 18, 2020 16 minutes ago, Renton said: I say this honestly CT. The collection of photos you have put on this thread are magnificent. Organise them into book format with the recipe instructions, get a book deal (or I'm sure nowadays you can do this yourself or with minimal crowd funding, @Rayvin might know), and get this out. Have your face on the inside cover, and brief biog. Hard back coffee table style. Honestly think it could be a huge hit. You've got enough material now. I never check this thread but tbh I can quite believe what Renton is saying. If you need any support self publishing anything CT, just give me a shout. 1 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Monkeys Fist 42004 Posted April 18, 2020 Share Posted April 18, 2020 “Salt. Fat. Fuck it.Eat. Mastering the Art of Duck Pizza” It’ll sell in the tens of copies Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Isegrim 9717 Posted April 18, 2020 Share Posted April 18, 2020 55 minutes ago, Renton said: I say this honestly CT. The collection of photos you have put on this thread are magnificent. Organise them into book format with the recipe instructions, get a book deal (or I'm sure nowadays you can do this yourself or with minimal crowd funding, @Rayvin might know), and get this out. Have your face on the inside cover, and brief biog. Hard back coffee table style. Honestly think it could be a huge hit. You've got enough material now. You'd better sell the book with a tomato on top tbh. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Monkeys Fist 42004 Posted April 18, 2020 Share Posted April 18, 2020 50 minutes ago, Alex said: 34” buttery biscuit base Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gemmill 44265 Posted April 19, 2020 Author Share Posted April 19, 2020 That fucking pizza. Looks like a tramp shit on a naan bread. 4 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Meenzer 15371 Posted April 19, 2020 Share Posted April 19, 2020 2 minutes ago, Gemmill said: That fucking pizza. Looks like a tramp shit on a naan bread. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Monkeys Fist 42004 Posted April 19, 2020 Share Posted April 19, 2020 He did. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Howmanheyman 32713 Posted April 20, 2020 Share Posted April 20, 2020 9 hours ago, Gemmill said: That fucking pizza. Looks like a tramp shit on a naan bread. "It's the way he cooks 'em!" 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Alex 34786 Posted April 20, 2020 Share Posted April 20, 2020 On 18/04/2020 at 20:01, Renton said: I say this honestly CT. The collection of photos you have put on this thread are magnificent. Organise them into book format with the recipe instructions, get a book deal (or I'm sure nowadays you can do this yourself or with minimal crowd funding, @Rayvin might know), and get this out. Have your face on the inside cover, and brief biog. Hard back coffee table style. Honestly think it could be a huge hit. You've got enough material now. ‘Ruined by Gluttony’. A sort of culinary version of that Crap Postcards book. The title can also be used to caption every photo in the tome (and as an epitaph on CT’s tomb). 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Monkeys Fist 42004 Posted April 20, 2020 Share Posted April 20, 2020 The follow-up. “ 365 Hobbies in 365 Days- How to fill the Gaping Maw of Sadness” All proceeds donated to Budgie Rescue in memory of dear, departed Peter. 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gemmill 44265 Posted April 21, 2020 Author Share Posted April 21, 2020 First sourdough loaf. I mean, it's "rustic" but I'm happy enough with it. Haven't had a taste yet cos it's just out the oven. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ewerk 30221 Posted April 21, 2020 Share Posted April 21, 2020 You realise you can just buy one from Tesco for a couple of quid? It’s a real timesaver. #lifehacks 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gemmill 44265 Posted April 21, 2020 Author Share Posted April 21, 2020 I don't enter shops anymore. I thrive on being in the house. Lockdown is my jam. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dr Gloom 21801 Posted April 21, 2020 Share Posted April 21, 2020 great effort. good-looking crust. maybe could have risen a bit more - how was the crumb? what have you got in your starter? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Monkeys Fist 42004 Posted April 21, 2020 Share Posted April 21, 2020 Get fucking Gloom Hollywood here! 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dr Gloom 21801 Posted April 21, 2020 Share Posted April 21, 2020 my kitchen has been like a boulangerie the past few weeks Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Meenzer 15371 Posted April 21, 2020 Share Posted April 21, 2020 Now we're talking. https://www.insider.com/ikea-swedish-meatball-and-gravy-recipe-to-make-at-home-2020-4 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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